Using your Artistic Skills

[bigneil]

So you've reached a lull in the relationship. Nothing is wrong per se, but the original spark was so intense that things are relatively lackluster.

First, we recall point 16 in Art of Seduction: Prove Yourself: Most people want to be seduced. If they resist your efforts, it is probably because you have not gone far enough to allay their doubts - about your motives, the depth of your feelings, and so on. One well-timed action that shows how far you are willing to go to win them over will dispel their doubts.

Time for the artist in you to express himself.

*If you can draw, draw her.
*If you can paint, paint her.
*If you can sing, serenade her.

It has to be based on your own creative genius, something you are the best at.

Tonight I drew a caricature of my girl and she loved it. Now she's texting me about having her body painted.

 

[zekko]

I like your quote from the Art of Seduction about allaying her doubts. It's interesting that it seems to contradict what they tell you around here, which is basically to keep her doubts alive.

I've lost women to the artistic type before (also the cowboy type and athletic type), so I agree this is something women are attracted to. Conversely, I've never lost a woman to a jerk/bad boy type. That's one reason I think half the stuff on here is BS.

I used to play in bands and gained a lot of women that way so I'm kind of an artistic type myself. I'm not sure why they find this attractive (art doesn't seem very alpha) but they do.

 

[bigneil]

We want to allay their doubts about our reliability while simultaneously keeping them in doubt of our feelings toward them.

A youtube video of a song is probably the modern equivalent of a serenade.

Women also love a cartoon likeness of themselves. I used to draw Hooters girls and months later I'd see them and they'd still have my drawing of them in their notepad.

Artwork immortalizes them (their ultimate dream) but be sure not to overwork it or you'll appear to have spent too much time. One hour of time invested max (i.e. the amount of time you spend at a Hooters visit).

 

[bigneil]

Wow, not a lot of artists here.

 

[zekko]

We want to allay their doubts about our reliability while simultaneously keeping them in doubt of our feelings toward them.

But your quote says to allay their doubts about the depth of our feelings for them, so you're looking at this through DJ tinted glasses. I tend to agree though.

The proper frame to keep here is "I find you attractive, now I want to see what you're about. If you turn out to be worthy, I may give you a chance".
When it says allay her doubts about your motives, I think that means letting her know "I'm not a player, I'm not looking to just use you for sex, I genuinely find you interesting".

Of course a lot of guys think that letting her know you ARE a player and the biggest pimp on the planet is the best way to attract her. But I think this mainly only works with certain types of women, or if you find a girl who is just looking for a quick roll in the hay. Otherwise, I think you're better off "allaying her doubts about your motives".

I bet your artist trick of drawing them would make a big impression. An interesting bit of fun for them, and probably feeds their ego while showing you are a talented guy.

Wow, not a lot of artists here.

It's early yet, you only posted this up this morning.

 

[Alex DeLarge]

Art and music do not seem very "alpha" per se.. But a lot of women like guys who are artistic because it shows a communication of feelings. I am a guitar player, but I've never written a song about a girl but I've recorded songs and sent them to girls I was seeing back in highschool (they all loved it!).

I'm quite talented with drawing, just cartoons though. I would always fool around and draw funny comic strips in my high school classes and show my friends, maybe a few girls I'm interested in as well. I could see a little spike in interest.

Sure, being artistic isn't macho or anything.. But it's talent. Talent is a reflection of your personality because..

1.) It shows you put a lot of time and effort toward a goal of mastering your talent.
2.) It shows a communication of emotions.
3.) It's a sign of creativity.. You're gonna be more fun than a lot of other guys.

Any girl that thinks being artistic is "pvssy sh1t" can go date a guy from the Jersey shore tv show instead lol.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Artistry deomonstrates mastery and passion, two big turn-ons for women. It also incites emotions in her, and that is always a good thing.

If you're a guitarist and you want to melt a woman into a pile of butter (not recommended for the lactose intolerant among us), play and sing James Taylor's "Close Your Eyes" for her.

You will actually see those little hearts flying out of her like in a Betty Boop cartoon.

 

[MisterD]

There are a lot of positive elements that go along with being seen as artistic. It shows you're creative, it shows you can express yourself, it shows focus, it shows talent. It shows depth of character, it shows you're interesting. It shows you're good at something (if you are in fact good at what you do). It definitely gives you an edge. Although I'm sure this, like many other things, works on different kinds of women. I don't know if it has a magic bullet effect. But bottom line, if you're artistic, show her that side of you.

 

[Jariel]

I like your quote from the Art of Seduction about allaying her doubts. It's interesting that it seems to contradict what they tell you around here, which is basically to keep her doubts alive.

I've lost women to the artistic type before (also the cowboy type and athletic type), so I agree this is something women are attracted to. Conversely, I've never lost a woman to a jerk/bad boy type. That's one reason I think half the stuff on here is BS.

I'm with you on that. Or at least, during the seduction process. Making her feel special and appreciated will set you apart from all the clueless and shallow guys trying to impress her with witty lines, party tricks or playing the jerk.

As with all good things, however, do this kind of thing too often and she'll take it for granted. I have learned that there comes a point once you have her interest where you need to back off and let her pursue you and your attention.

 

[bigneil]

I'm quite talented with drawing, just cartoons though. I would always fool around and draw funny comic strips in my high school classes and show my friends, maybe a few girls I'm interested in as well. I could see a little spike in interest.

The key is not to spend too much time on it or you seem like a stalker. So cartoons are ideal. If you can pull off the one minute doodle likeness, even better. Remember the rule of drawing women: Keep them pretty!

Expressing yourself with art won't create interest, but it can amplify interest when you are already involved. It's the 3 month mark for me, so it was time.

Remember, the woman wants to be adored. She wants to be famous and have things that she can show her friends to prove she is special. Art can not only provide that, but can actually immortalize her. It must be professional quality to appear Alpha.

An occasional poetry line (I like to quote stuff from the 1800's) can go a long way also.

 

[handle]

I'm an artist and a writer but I don't think I would ever do this... I have a big show coming up, don't think my girlfriend even knows about it. Probably because I get so annoyed with people who bring up their art in everyday conversations. If they're around me enough then they'll learn that I have a studio space and all that jazz.

 

[bigneil]

I agree handle that it's best they "discover" the talent. Such as bringing her to the show without letting her know it was your work.

More from Art of Seduction point 16:

"Never appear discouraged by people's resistance, or complain. Instead, meet the challenge by doing something extreme or chivalrous. Conversely, spur others to prove themselves by making yourself hard to reach, unattainable, worth fighting over."

The last thing you want to do is seek praise after.

 

[Griever114]

I was an art major in college so i can pretty much draw, paint and sing anything... now WHERE ARE MAH B1TCHES!!!

Lol

 

[Victory Unlimited]

Wow, not a lot of artists here.

Yo Big Neil,


I'm an artist, illustrator, writer, and a music composer. I've found that the only way I've been able to use ANY of those skills, gifts, and talents to get women is by them "accidentally" discovering that I can do these things. Or, better yet-----whenever they actually SEE me in the act of doing these things naturally.

I've NEVER personally been able to attract women by "showing off". Usually if I can find a way to casually mention that I can do these things in casual conversation (naturally), then that can help to BOOST her attraction, but it's never caused her to become attracted.

All in all, when a woman actually sees me doing these things in a way that has NOTHING whatsoever to do with trying to impress "her" in particular---------THEN, I usually can get some kind of mileage out of these gifts.


Peace.

 

[Juan Don]

So you've reached a lull in the relationship. Nothing is wrong per se, but the original spark was so intense that things are relatively lackluster.

First, we recall point 16 in Art of Seduction

is this a book?

 

[bigneil]

Yes, by Robert Greene. A classic reference (too much to read in linear fashion due to excepts in margins).

Practice drawing waitresses. If you can pull off the napkin job by the time they get the fries, in a manner that they are willing to show off to friends, you are in.

Does anyone do body painting?

 

[Juan Don]

cool thanks i'll have to read it

 

[handle]

Still have to disagree with you, op. Seems like a very odd approach (drawing your waitress? taking your girlfriend to your own show as a surprise?). But whatever works for you. Maybe we differ because of how the art is incorporated into our lives. I'm out there trying to get shows, get pieces sold etc... Which makes it a different thing than just a hobby. But even still, I don't like to bring it up or show it off because I really dislike when others do the same.

 

[zekko]

Handle, you seem like a modest fellow. It's a good trait, but don't overdo it, you may miss some opportunities.

I said I've lost women to artistic types before. The one girl I was casually dating (a plate, basically) took an art class and got involved with a guy there. He was the "star student" and very talented apparently so he actually was sort of alpha in that respect (he was the top, or best, artist in the class).

Anyway, after she met this guy her interest in me dropped. I could have continued with it but by then I figured what was the point.

Lol at the tip about practicing drawing waitresses. Makes sense, I must admit, if you're going to be flirting with them.

 

[Atom Smasher]

Atom Smasher is talking with a girl on the phone.

All of a sudden there is a noise and Atom Smasher proclaims "Oh no!"

Girl - "What happened? What was that noise"

Atom - "Oh, nothing. I just accidentally kicked my guitar, but thank God, it looks like it's ok."

Girl - "Oh, play me something, please!!"

Atom - "IDK, it's a little hard to play while you're holding the phone."

Girl - "Oh, please?! You can put the phone down."

Atom - "Maybe sometime." [Starts to talk about other things]

Girl brings up the guitar again and because I am such a kind, giving soul I relent and play something for her.

Girl sitting in puddle...

The moral of the story is that you can slyly make her aware of your art as if "Oops, I accidently let the cat out of the bag." Then be "reluctant" to perfom/accomplish it in front of her (to indicate that you are modest). She must beg for a performance.

Be careful... If you don't understand the nuance of this, it will be painfully obvious that you are orchestrating it. It should be entirely "accidental".

The payoff is twofold... One, that you have mastery over a talent, and two, that you are very secure in it and don't need to show off to gain her approval. This is very attractive to her.