hungary1234
Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 7, 2014
- Messages
- 13
- Reaction score
- 0
Hey Im new here and I really like this site..wish I knew about it years ago!!! :woo:
Ok.....so I met a young female shes 19 and Im 30, and we are neighbours!!
She has a baby about 9mnths old and the "ex" was an ******* who left her when she fell pregnant (which is true by the way and also assaulted her too which is proved by police reports) has very little to do with her and her child.
So I come into the picture one day , we start hanging then sex and then before I know it relatonship!! She loved me in 3 weeks and after 4 months we move in together (new house) and I am the childs dad now and helping everything to do possible with raising her!! (great man arent I?)
So after a miscarriage and 8 months of a really fun but rocky relationship and i must admit we hardly broke up it was just her nonsense and most of it I handled not too bad apart from some of her games.
But sure enough by valentines day she broke up with me, we both were working extremely long hours and i was doing night shift at a bakery while she was doing waitressing in the peak holiday season and we were raising a baby and I was doing a majority of cooking and all that **** cos she couldnt handle it.
She just started acting distant and broke down and I mean really break down
saying I didnt love her anymore and she loved me too much she couldnt focus on her baby...maybe this was the BPD talking were they get too engulfed and abandoned???
So she leaves 2 weeks later...Im cool about it all but then gutted and I must admit I had a massive go at her about everything cos she was stringing me on sleeping around and still trying to use me.
Then a month later she gets a new bf..one from her past who is her babies dads best mate!! lol his no better than the dad, I hear they were dead beats in there school days...
But the whole time I was in some triangle for like 3 months mainly cos I was still daddy to her kid and the kid actually started bonding with me and saw me as a parent...
It was tough to take on the chin cos we bonded pretty good and I must admit I loved her and still do..(both of them to be honest)
Well that new guy dumped her cos it was long distnace and he didnt want kids...I can tell having a child will be a massive obsticale for her in the future..so she ends up moving to her sisters another state away..
this is where 2 guy friends (orbiters) live but both are chumps and would die for her!!! lol
I should of seen the red flags early it was all there and I didnt realise it till it was too late...eg
*19 year old raising a baby single with father in a new relationship
*emotionally cold parents who dont really care for her
*extreme jelousy early on and has lots of guy friends and basically no girl friends as she always fights and burns bridges by using everyone
*was triangulating me and everyone else the whole time
*extreme mood swings
*no empathy for me at all and would say some ****ed up ****
*switches her emotions off sometimes in an "instant"
*had this lost stare in her eyes I knew straight away it wasnt right
*will have sex very easy with me and wasnt afraid to admit it and also said if she drinks she will pretty much go off with anyone
*extremely self centered and highly judgmental of everyone she knows
*hated my family and cut me off from everyone in the end! lol
*ended up falling pregnant to me (miscarried)
*bad personal hygiene , very messy unorganised
*cant handle the tiniest bit of stress and loses it over anything
*obsessed with love stories and disney movies
*and loves "ZOO's"
The list goes on and on I could sit here all day! lol I know she sounds like a typical young chick but everyone who knows here and my mates and family all said she has serious mental problems and is in denial...
So ppl...can I get your advice thanks and honest serious answers too I have copped alot of **** and been invalidated by everyone I know about it! lol
Ive realised she wont let me go ever and I highly doubt she will find someone like me again...I'm a "nice guy" but also not your average one, I still didnt take her **** or walk on egg shells and stood up to her alot and still do. I helped her alot with her BPD meltdowns by calming her and I gave her space when she was planning to break up a few times over nothing.
Its been 9months now after break up and Is there any chance to get her interested again?? She might be into the last guy still but there over it was only a fb thing...
She still goes on about missing the place she left where i am and brings all the good things we did up..
I havent been needy or desperate apart from a month when she left me!! lol
I have been unavailable to her a lot latley but its not making her really go crazy..
I still love her but from a distance and I accept the person she is..she is alot of fun to be with and I know she struggles in life and always will eat up more men or get with more abusive men.. :box:
I have been doing my research and I understand now how to be in a r/s with a BPDer now and I know alot about it and I think im best off with her cos shes safe with me and she knows this, i looked after her and her kid but she lost her **** and i think she knows what she's lost but just wont do much about it..
I know ppl will say what the fck are you doing wanting to be with her but I grew up with a severe mentally ill father and this is normal for me it doesnt bother me at all and she doesnt hurt me like it would to soemone else..I enjoy her drama and games its actually interesting how her brain ticks its so predictable its not funny!!
So guys....how can I get this one back for a recycle??
I know what Im up for and the potential diisaster but I want one more go so I can say i tried...we had a decdnt r/s but I was a bit AFC to her.
This is all by phone and text thats it...I know i have a chance because she wont let me go just yet the attachment is there somehow, she hoovers me pretty hard i must admit..
Cheers :woo: :cheer: :box:
Ok.....so I met a young female shes 19 and Im 30, and we are neighbours!!
She has a baby about 9mnths old and the "ex" was an ******* who left her when she fell pregnant (which is true by the way and also assaulted her too which is proved by police reports) has very little to do with her and her child.
So I come into the picture one day , we start hanging then sex and then before I know it relatonship!! She loved me in 3 weeks and after 4 months we move in together (new house) and I am the childs dad now and helping everything to do possible with raising her!! (great man arent I?)
So after a miscarriage and 8 months of a really fun but rocky relationship and i must admit we hardly broke up it was just her nonsense and most of it I handled not too bad apart from some of her games.
But sure enough by valentines day she broke up with me, we both were working extremely long hours and i was doing night shift at a bakery while she was doing waitressing in the peak holiday season and we were raising a baby and I was doing a majority of cooking and all that **** cos she couldnt handle it.
She just started acting distant and broke down and I mean really break down
saying I didnt love her anymore and she loved me too much she couldnt focus on her baby...maybe this was the BPD talking were they get too engulfed and abandoned???
So she leaves 2 weeks later...Im cool about it all but then gutted and I must admit I had a massive go at her about everything cos she was stringing me on sleeping around and still trying to use me.
Then a month later she gets a new bf..one from her past who is her babies dads best mate!! lol his no better than the dad, I hear they were dead beats in there school days...
But the whole time I was in some triangle for like 3 months mainly cos I was still daddy to her kid and the kid actually started bonding with me and saw me as a parent...
It was tough to take on the chin cos we bonded pretty good and I must admit I loved her and still do..(both of them to be honest)Well that new guy dumped her cos it was long distnace and he didnt want kids...I can tell having a child will be a massive obsticale for her in the future..so she ends up moving to her sisters another state away..
this is where 2 guy friends (orbiters) live but both are chumps and would die for her!!! lol
I should of seen the red flags early it was all there and I didnt realise it till it was too late...eg
*19 year old raising a baby single with father in a new relationship
*emotionally cold parents who dont really care for her
*extreme jelousy early on and has lots of guy friends and basically no girl friends as she always fights and burns bridges by using everyone
*was triangulating me and everyone else the whole time
*extreme mood swings
*no empathy for me at all and would say some ****ed up ****
*switches her emotions off sometimes in an "instant"
*had this lost stare in her eyes I knew straight away it wasnt right
*will have sex very easy with me and wasnt afraid to admit it and also said if she drinks she will pretty much go off with anyone
*extremely self centered and highly judgmental of everyone she knows
*hated my family and cut me off from everyone in the end! lol
*ended up falling pregnant to me (miscarried)
*bad personal hygiene , very messy unorganised
*cant handle the tiniest bit of stress and loses it over anything
*obsessed with love stories and disney movies
*and loves "ZOO's"
The list goes on and on I could sit here all day! lol I know she sounds like a typical young chick but everyone who knows here and my mates and family all said she has serious mental problems and is in denial...
So ppl...can I get your advice thanks and honest serious answers too I have copped alot of **** and been invalidated by everyone I know about it! lol
Ive realised she wont let me go ever and I highly doubt she will find someone like me again...I'm a "nice guy" but also not your average one, I still didnt take her **** or walk on egg shells and stood up to her alot and still do. I helped her alot with her BPD meltdowns by calming her and I gave her space when she was planning to break up a few times over nothing.
Its been 9months now after break up and Is there any chance to get her interested again?? She might be into the last guy still but there over it was only a fb thing...
She still goes on about missing the place she left where i am and brings all the good things we did up..
I havent been needy or desperate apart from a month when she left me!! lol
I have been unavailable to her a lot latley but its not making her really go crazy..
I still love her but from a distance and I accept the person she is..she is alot of fun to be with and I know she struggles in life and always will eat up more men or get with more abusive men.. :box:
I have been doing my research and I understand now how to be in a r/s with a BPDer now and I know alot about it and I think im best off with her cos shes safe with me and she knows this, i looked after her and her kid but she lost her **** and i think she knows what she's lost but just wont do much about it..
I know ppl will say what the fck are you doing wanting to be with her but I grew up with a severe mentally ill father and this is normal for me it doesnt bother me at all and she doesnt hurt me like it would to soemone else..I enjoy her drama and games its actually interesting how her brain ticks its so predictable its not funny!!
So guys....how can I get this one back for a recycle??
I know what Im up for and the potential diisaster but I want one more go so I can say i tried...we had a decdnt r/s but I was a bit AFC to her.
This is all by phone and text thats it...I know i have a chance because she wont let me go just yet the attachment is there somehow, she hoovers me pretty hard i must admit..
Cheers :woo: :cheer: :box: