Too old for Boot Camp?

[Ever onward]

Greetings all,

This is my first post at this board. I've been trying Boot Camp on my own for the past week. Basically my goal for the whole thing is to get over my "social anxiety problem" and not focus on "meeting girls".

I've been going to the mall, to stores, basically any public place to try and collect the 50 hi's. To make it even more of a challenge, I'm trying to focus my hi's on attractive women.

The problem is, no matter where I go, all the good looking women seem way too young for me. I know there are older babes out there, so where are they?

I don't know, I just feel like an old guy. I am only 27 but everyone always tells me I look older. How can I stop caring what others think? How can I get over the fact that I'm not a 19 year old pretty boy anymore?

And one last thing, don't give me some reply like "grow some balls" or be a man, that's what I'm trying to do here people!

 

[bbc]

.........I know there are older babes out there, so where are they?

Hm, have you tried grocery stores? young chicks r unwilling to go there.

..........I am only 27 but everyone always tells me I look older. How can I stop caring what others think?

Think about that: at 19 most chick did nto consider you a man at all. Just a boy. and those who tell you "you look older" I guess telling you a compliment. The older you are the more attractive you are in chick's eyes: theyassume you got better job, more money, got serious etc

.........How can I stop caring what others think?

Good question. And hard to answer. Get _angry enough_ to get some first satisfying results. Some aggressiveness help you to focus on the results and not on other's thoughts.
The more you succeed the less you'll care about what other think cuz the success'll lead you on.

 

[DJnomore]

Its simple.

If you were a millionare, worked out every day, had washboard abs, drove a nice car, were well read and respected yourself do you think you would have any problems getting a girl from 18 to 55?

The more you resemble the above guy the easier it is. Simple tip though most women can't tell if you are that guy or not and they rely on your opinion of yourself to tip them off.....don't tell them you are a wuss.

 

[Ever onward]

Hmmm, well thanks for the advice guys.

I guess the only thing that can really help is total confidence, and that is difficult to get without success. Not yet anyways.

But surely I'm not the only guy here who feels insecure about approaching girls who may be too young. If I see a hottie, the first thing that pops into my head is "is she old enough?" and then "if I talk to her, will she just think I'm some weird old dude?".

Anybody here have some good stories about approaching girls who turned out to be too young? Maybe if we can all learn to laugh at it then it won't seem so bad.

 

[Austin Allegro]

Don't worry about it. 27 is NOT old in any sense. I'm 32 and have been out with two 22 year olds recently. No woman over about the age of 21 will see your age as an issue, but I'd keep to the over 18s though because you don't really want to be dating schoolgirls.

 

[Dirtheart]

Don't fret at all. A lot of women see age and maturity as a very positive quality and I'm starting to realise that late 20s and early 30s are a very good age for attracting younger women. I'm 28 and I get more attention now than I've ever had before and most of it comes from girls in their teens to early 20s (though I'm with Austin and wouldn't date anyone below 18).

Always play up your maturity and sophistication, and dress and speak accordingly. Try to portray success, calmness and confidence too, as this enhances your psychological attraction (VERY important to women).

NEVER try to act younger or more energetic than you are and never try to adapt to younger people! Then you will start to look like you're having an early midlife crisis and be perceived as insecure. In general, women prefer to look upto a guy.

Really, we older guys have an advantage. Just make the most of it.

 

[Ever onward]

Thanks guys!

The more I think about it the more I realize it's all in my head. I mean sure, I'm not a teenager anymore but by no means am I an old dude. I think its more of an insecurity issue and not feeling I fit in.

But hey I'm getting there!

-cheers

 

[gentleman193]

i'm going to offer some more comprehensive advice as i've felt this way sometimes, but first of all . . .

27 is old?

not on this forum, young man. i'm 30 and that is YOUNG for a mature man . . .

okay, now that we are straight, you see that 22 yo walking down the street, and she feels too young for you.

why?

b/c you are thinking in the context of the mystical soulmate/best-friend romance where she understands all about you etc.

well, time to let go of that. as a mature man you no longer look to a woman for self-validation or guidance or whatever.

SHE IS NOT YOUR MOTHER

you are not expecting her to lead you anymore. you are not going to worry about "bothering" her. you are not interested in her for help with your homework or wisdom or advice. you are going to take the lead and expect the good women to play a supporting role.

once you do this, once you step up to the lead role, you realize that youth is an asset. the young woman will follow you where the older one won't. she will buy into your ambitions, your aura, etc. and that's what you want. you want to be the star, not the doormat.

further, she will lighten your load. instead of hearing about another crap day at work from someone your age you can talk about the grad school thesis. or whatever other unreal thing young girls are spending their time on. it's a nice distraction.

finally, to really ease your mind, consider that the younger the girl, the less they know about sex and romance. maybe they had sex, but have they ever really had romance done right? doubtful, as most guys their age don't have the cash, or the imagination. how is some college boy gonna captivate them? doesn't happen often. but she can spin all kinds of mystique around the older man. it makes it really easy, there's a fat margin of error to work with here.

as for the creep part, i think that happens when instead of aproaching, you creep around the permiter. well, that's creepy. but if you simply look her in the eyes, lay down a smooth compliment about that bracelet, necklace, doodad whatever it is she's got on that no guy ever notices, keep it light and confident, etc., she will be dying inside for you and melt inyour hands.

in the end it is older guys like us who are doing these women a favor by showing them it can be so much better than yet another dumb azz frat boy in abercrombie and fitch. sex is the least they can do for the way we can make them feel simply by playing the role right.

and once you finally get bored of these girls, consider Ovid's advice: no woman is perfect until she is 35.

hint -- say these words to a woman of this age and she is yours for the night.

 

[Ever onward]

Wow gentleman thanks for the post! I think maybe you've struck a nerve for me and you've given me a lot to think about.

That's exactly the way I want to feel, like I'm in control or leading, and if I can achieve that feeling maybe I won't be so insecure about other things.

I don't know what else to say here, you've blown my mind.

 

[bobj1]

thank you for your advice...I do owe it to myself to seek a woman who is whole, not full of baggage from the estdrabged hsuband. and, I certainly do not want to be an emotional tampon. well said. thanks again.

 

[WestCoaster]

It's not age, it's maturity level

The two most immature women I've dated were 36 and 37 (and I was a bit younger than them). They both were acting like they were 22 or younger, had the emotional maturity of teenagers, and couldn't understand why their life sucked (single moms, bad health, dated dirtbags, unemployed half the time). The only reason I dated them was I was a terrible AFC and thought that's all I could get.

After wising up I dated women from 23 to 43 and all points in between and found the 23-year old was more mature than the two aforementioned women; and some of the 40-year old women were excellent.

What's the lesson here? Maturity level. It is EVERYTHING. If you meet a gal in her early 20's and she's actually attending college or has a degree or some career plans, and isn't hopping into bed with every d-ckwad who looks her way, it's worth investigating. Same with 40-year olds and up.

If you run into a 20-30-40 or older who still thinks and acts like she's in high school, has no class, sleeps around, has no career or self-improvement plans, best to cut bait and get the h-ll out.

Look for that maturity level darn quick.

 

[Ever onward]

Hey bob

I don't know much about meeting women, that's why I'm here I suppose. But I do know far too much about getting hurt by women.

See that's my problem, I need to get better at meeting women. That's the only reason why I was messing around with a married woman to begin with, I didn't feel I had any better oppurtunities. I need to stop settling, I can do better and so can you!

 

[number6]

If you have the desire to become more fit, you can do this bootcamp for teenagers program. There will be people close to your age but might not be the same rank. But that's ok, you'll make friends of every age & shape!