To everyone who wants to know what the "DJ way" to do something or other is....

VoodooChild

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 14, 2003
Messages
381
Reaction score
0
Age
42
Location
Norman, OK, home of the SOONERS
Every time I log in here (much less often lately, mostly due to the rampant idiocy) I marvel at the plethora of posts wanting to know what the "Don Juan" way to do something is. What's the Don Juan way to dress? What's the Don Juan music to listen to? What are some Don Juan movies to watch? What's the Don Juan way to approach a girl?

Well, in the humble opinion of Your Faithful Correspondent, anyone who even needs to CONSIDER asking such a question is so far from Don Juan-ness as to defy comprehension. Being a Don Juan is not about following a set of rules. It is not a mathematical equation (A + B + C = Laid.) There is no set procedure for being a Don Juan. Yes, there are certain techniques, approaches, and whatnot which work. Females are far more understandable and predictable than most people believe. Making the woman chase you, not the other way around, is a good thing. Having multiple prospects to keep your social stock high is a good thing. Waiting a few days (at least) to call a woman is a good thing. All of these things pretty much universally work. But that does not mean that one can simply follow a set approach and succeed. A better way to approach DJism is that what is presented in the bible, and on this site, is a skeleton. You get the basic framework of what works and what doesn't, but then you must flesh it out into a complete approach, or a complete lifestyle, yourself. Because what works for someone else, in terms of fleshing out their game, may very well not work for you.

DJism should not be approached as an instruction manual. Following the precise guidelines that work for someone else, repeating the exact approaches of someone else, or doing anything because someone else does it completely defeats the purpose of being a Don Juan. I know that "just be yourself" is the epitome of AFC advice, but there is a certain element of truth to it. However, instead of just being himself, the Don Juan decides to "just be the man you want to be." He sees himself the way he wants to be, and (this is key) MAKES himself that man. He does not make himself Pook, or SexPDX, or Allen, or anyone else for that matter. What works for Pook works for Pook. What works for SexPDX works for SexPDX. What works for Giovanni Casanova works for Giovanni Casanova. And what works for me (sing along, you know the words) works for me. And guess what? It's not the exact approach used by anyone else. I gleaned certain aspects of the approach of pretty much everyone on here who's worth listening to, aspects that work for me, aspects I like, aspects I can do, and aspects that work on the kind of women I want to attract. Slavishly following everything in the DJ Bible, or in the approach of a DJ you admire, is not a substitute for genuine personal development and forming your own way of doing things. This is a crutch. It lets you get by until you have developed enough to survive without it. But at some point, you gotta let it go and walk on your own.

I would liken DJing to jeet kune do. However, most of you seem to think it's karate. As Bruce Lee put it in The Tao of Jeet Kune Do, "Jeet Kune Do favors formlessness so that it can assume all forms and since Jeet Kune Do has no style, it can fit in with all styles. As a result, Jeet Kune Do utilizes all ways and is bound by none and, likewise, uses any techniques or means which serve its end." Most of you seem to be using karate instead of Jeet Kune Do. You are limiting yourselves by restricting yourselves to established rules. It's much more effective to use whatever works for you than to shackle yourself through slavishly following someone else's rules which you impose upon yourself.

"Understanding comes about through feeling, from moment to moment in the mirror of relationship. Understanding oneself happens through a process of relationships and not through isolation. To know oneself is to study oneself in action with another person."

In other words, you won't know what works until you get off the message board, get out into real life and get to know yourself.

I'll close with one more quote from the Dragon which nicely sums up my argument: "If you follow the classical pattern, you are understanding the routine, the tradition, the shadow - you are not understanding yourself."
 

ASav

Don Juan
Joined
Jan 6, 2003
Messages
78
Reaction score
0
Age
48
Location
Queens, NY
Great post and great points.

The only thing I have to say is that hopefully more guys turn around and spend more time on how to create themselves into their own "don juans." It would do us a world of good rather than half the guys today who act like girls used to in grade school. Usurping male power, scary but preventable. Be the man, stoic and proud. That's all, Be the Man.
 

GQ Prettyboy

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 8, 2003
Messages
170
Reaction score
2
Age
42
Location
memphis
I totally agree with you. Everyone talking about you should this and that. I think everyone need to develop their own system of how to be successful with women or anything else. There is nothing wrong with accepting advice, but you need to know which advice suits you the best. We have so much information on this site that it`s not even funny. And muthaf*ckas still having problems getting women. There is no magic formula. Just get out there do some socializing. Everybody on here likes reading Doc love`s advice on women. The reason why he know so much about dating and women is because he went out there and experience the world that is full of women. He didn`t come on a website and ask what everybody else think about this and that. If he wanted to know, he`ll go find out for himself.
 
Top