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tips for using internet match sites

mavericktf

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So has anyone had much luck with the internet match sites like match.com and matchmaker.com? What tips do you have for a fellow DJ? I tried them for a couple months and got plenty of play, just didnt meet many high quality women (looks/personality/etc). Are these sites just for loser men and women or what? How do you make these sites work for you?


TA
 

Industry

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Picking women up on these sites is in a way similar to picking a girl up at a bar. Every type of women is on there.... the working woman with no time to date, the girls sick of dumbass guys at bars, anti-social punks looking for some internet attention, hoes, sluts and the like. It's just a matter of weeding through the crap to get to the good ones. I have met only one girl from the internet (hot or not). She is a def. hottie and we are going offroading this weekend. Just use it wisely and if you're looking for a LTR, I'm not so sure that's the place to go. But to each his own.
 

InLawsHateMe

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Tell ya what I did... ;)

When I got divorced, I said, 'f*ck it' and went for the online dating thing, just because.. ya only live once right, so wtf?

I got on there, gave myself an interesting user name... don't give yourself some stale name like InLawsHateMe. ...j/k :D do give yourself a intersting name, like Mr.Interesting... or MoreFunThanYouWillEverHave, etc... set up some good pics.

Try to meet all the babes in your area, and surrounding areas online. Email, chat, whatever.... drop massive emails. Once you have gotten to talk to them or whatever, invite them all to your party!! :) ...find a local bar, dance club, and just invite everyone and their mothers (that means friends from work, around the hood, etc.) :) .... it's a good way to meet adventurous ppl.... good luck dude.. worked for me. :)

btw.. don't expect to find too many babes on there... My guess is that if they are 8-9's they most likey wouldn't need online dating services.

LOL!! I remember hooking up a gf of mine on there, she wasn't done with her survey, before some dude emailed her asking what color underwear she got on. :)
 

MisterAl

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Internet dating is a mixed bag. I've been doing it for a while and I've been doing fairly well lately. But there are lots of pitfalls. Here are tips and observations:

Quality is all over the place. Use your judgement. Most of the girls are going to be head-cases, flakers and oinkers. But there are some gems in there. Some quality women turn to the Internet because they don't meet good men at work or in bars. And they're also sick of the AFC crap they get from most online responses they get. Just with the DJ advice from this board you'll be ahead of most of the loser guys online.

Then again, I really haven't found what I've wanted online either. But it keeps me busy.

You absolutely have to get your shyt together for writing and posting your personal profile. I've discovered some crazy secrets about writing profiles that get responses. To avoid telling a dumb story, let's just say I once wrote a profile that I intended to never be seen and never get any responses, but to just get additional access to a site I was already registered to. That profile got multiple unsolicited responses per day and I got dates while I had to work for the attention that my legit profile on the same site got. I'll say I changed my plan pronto after that episode. :D

You have to keep your profile short and funny. Answer only a few of the questions, blow off the rest, and keep some of the answers C/F. It seems to be about mystery. They want the puzzle to figure out. If you dump out your guts about how wonderful you are, then there's nothing else to find out about you and no interest.

You really should have a good photo. The crappy, indoor, too-damn-dark photos will kill your chances. You need a friend to take your picture with a digital camera outside. Use a sunny day a couple hours before sunset for the sweet light. Get yourself near your car if it's nice. If there's a big, friendly dog around, use it! Do something candid with props that doesn't look posed, like getting into the car, hugging your dog, looking sideways toward the camera like a smartass, etc. This is seriously going to be the hardest part if you're not naturally photogenic. I'm not, but after a lot of effort I got something that works.

Burn though like a hundred photos and then pick the best two or three. Use photo editing software to crop them so they show your shoulders and face. Bump up the image gamma to about 1.7, change the image size to about 480x640 pixels, and save as a JPEG.

OK, now it's up to you to put in the time and effort to read all the profiles and send responses. The experimentation here never stops, but that's the fun part! :rolleyes: Send lots of responses, but keep them short, like two sentences or less. If you're getting replies to 10% of your letters, you need to change your technique. If you're getting 30-40%, that's great! More than 50-75% reply rate might be nearly phenomenal!

After a couple emails tell her you want to call her and talk on the phone. She'll send you digits if she's interested. If not, NEXT!
 

Jay26

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MisterAl, I don't know dude, that sounds like a lot of work!;)
 

Bud Wiser

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Originally posted by MisterAl
Send lots of responses, but keep them short, like two sentences or less. If you're getting replies to 10% of your letters, you need to change your technique. If you're getting 30-40%, that's great! More than 50-75% reply rate might be nearly phenomenal!
Unless you're sending responses to virtually every girl with two eyes, a nose and a mouth, 30-40% is way high. If you're selective -- responding only to women who are seven and above and don't sound nuts -- and you're decent looking, it'll come to roughly 15%. Add points the more you look like George Clooney.

Don't discount the importance of the right photo. Mind you, this is not the shot you think looks best; it's the shot that pulls best! Experiment like crazy with this. The one that works best for me is an expression of intensity, mirth and a touch of wise-ass. But I don't think it's my most flattering photo.

Whatever you do -- be funny and fun. If you can't write funny, learn how. There are some good books on Amazon.com on comedy writing. Buy. Read. Learn. Practice. (Warning -- if you post a funny profile, be prepared to be funny in person, too. Congruity is essential. Funny is money with the women.)

Of course, the usual advice about ****y+funny works online, too.

Make sure you read and comprehend her profile narrative. If she doesn't write much, chances are she won't talk much in person, and vice versa. Neither are desirable traits. Watch out for those who write fractured, barely comprehensible sentences and switch back forth from caps to lower case; you might have a head case on your hands.
 

OddTech

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Some very good points here. And for your photo, don't be naked or half-naked or doing anything to show-off (unless you're looking for ONS types). Also, don't take pictures with other people/other girls. It distracts the picture. Probably the most thing to know is that it's a number-game. If you're average, most of the time you won't get any reply. And sometimes, you will get replies but the email exchanges quickly die off. Rarely (< 10%) will you be able to get the phone number and set up a date. It's a lot of work and time. But I think it's fun.

And another thing. I usually get the sites that require a payment. It's not too expensive, but the quality is much better. Try to also subscribe on a per-month basis. For example, I subscribe to SITE A for one month and then cancel after the month. Then I subscribe to another matchmaking SITE (B) or take an online break. The reason is because the addition of new ads don't increase much after one only month, and I don't want to waste my time emailing the same ads again. I go back to the site after a 3 month hiatus or so.
 

Dust 2 Dust

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I've personally found that online dating is all about looks. You can have the best personality and sense of humor in the world but if the chick aint diggin your pic your screwed.

Also, there are a lot of flakes online. They will act like their interested to meet you but when you ask for a number or date they either quit responding to your messages or they give you the "i need to get to know you better before we do that." Isn't the whole purpose of going on a date is to get to know the person better???

It truly is nothing but a numbers game. I met 5 women online. Of those 5 there were only 2 that i would have considered going on a second date with. Of those two i got a second date with one of them but things fizzled out after the second date because i was an afc(before finding this site and Doc Love.)
 
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