time spent with girlfriend

[TDK4]

Well after spending quite some time without a relationship so that I could iron out my personal AFC kinks, I now find myself in my first relationship post chump period. So this brings me to my question, when it came to the pursuit of the girl I was a master at being a challenge particularly in not always being available but now that I am in a relationship I realize that since this girl is now my girlfriend she does deserve more of my time. I was wondering how do I give this girl more of my time while still remaining a challenge. How much time is appropriate to spend with her a week?

When in doubt use the smell test -Maurice Chavez, Grand Theft Auto: Vice City

 

[DJ Fedorov]

Don't talk to her for a long time on the phone, don't make her a #1 priority in your life, continue being C&F, make sure she knows that you don't NEED her and if she were to ever act up you could easily find a new chick. I usually go out with my GF 2-3 times a week which seems fine to me but other people may disagree and say that's too much. Just use common sense and keep doing what is was that you were doing to get her interested in the first place. "If it ain't broke, don't fix it"

 

[sAxyguy83]

That depends on a lot of things. For one, what do you want to get out of the relationship? Sex? Love? Both? What you actually want is a major determining factor in how you proceed from here. My primary advice is that it's not how much time you spend with her as much as how you spend that time. Just hanging around pointlessly is OK once in a while, but too much of it can make her too accustomed to your presence, and spoil some of the "magic". Make sure she's enjoying her time with you, even if said enjoyment has nothing to do with your presence - she'll come to associate you with happiness. Occasionally, casually let her find out that some particular piece of time you spent with her was at an extremely inconvenient time for you - that'll demonstrate that you care. Don't sacrifice your entire schedule, however; maintain at least 50% of the control in the relationship.

 

[JustDoItAlways]

Challenge is not "time." It is not about how much time you spend with her or how much time you spend on the phone with her. It is not about being unavailable.

Challenge is about making her question in her own mind that she has totally won you over. The key is "in her mind".

Challenge is used to trigger an emotion in "her" and avoid dissappointment in "her". It has nothing to do with time, it is an emotion.

She should always question whether you are truly gone over on her or not.

In essence, it is making her try to constantly win you over. One the biggest female motivations is to win over and control desirable males. Once that is done, they often look for a new challenge or a new male to win over.

Challenge keeps her occupied. It makes her think that this is the best guy I can get, I'd better try to make him happy.

It is her prime goal in life, to find the best guy she can get.

Challenge is all about reinforcing that. She, in fact, "needs" it and wants it. Your job is to deliver it. And "it" is continuing to assure her that she has not won you over yet (in her mind, a strong male which is the best I can get.)

Challenge means not doing things that tell her or prove to her that she has you over. You can spend as much time and get as much sex as you want doing this while maintaining challenge.

 

[thecraftylefty]

Originally posted by JustDoItAlways
Challenge is not "time." It is not about how much time you spend with her or how much time you spend on the phone with her. It is not about being unavailable.

Challenge is about making her question in her own mind that she has totally won you over. The key is "in her mind".

Challenge is used to trigger an emotion in "her" and avoid dissappointment in "her". It has nothing to do with time, it is an emotion.

She should always question whether you are truly gone over on her or not.

In essence, it is making her try to constantly win you over. One the biggest female motivations is to win over and control desirable males. Once that is done, they often look for a new challenge or a new male to win over.

Challenge keeps her occupied. It makes her think that this is the best guy I can get, I'd better try to make him happy.

It is her prime goal in life, to find the best guy she can get.

Challenge is all about reinforcing that. She, in fact, "needs" it and wants it. Your job is to deliver it. And "it" is continuing to assure her that she has not won you over yet (in her mind, a strong male which is the best I can get.)

Challenge means not doing things that tell her or prove to her that she has you over. You can spend as much time and get as much sex as you want doing this while maintaining challenge.

This man knows what he's talking about. Take heed fellas.

"If your rap is strong it can't go wrong."

thecraftylefty