Thinking quicker on your feet

[speakeasy]

I was chatting with a blonde HB8 at the beach today, pretty cute face, smallish tits, but an ass I could doggie for days on end. She gave me a few IOIs. I'll spare you the mundane details, but to make a long story short, she was in a set of 6 and I failed to open the set appropriately, isolate her, flirt with her, get in any kino and get a number close.

I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. When I am in the heat of the moment, my mind goes blank. All the DJ/PUA stuff I've studied just evaporates and I'm like the deer frozen in the headlights. Now that I'm home, I'm thinking the scenario over in my mind and think "damnit! When she said X, why didn't I say Y!!!" I start seeing all these possibilities of how I could've handled the situation better but didn't because my brain feels like it refuses to work. It's like I'm having trouble thinking on my feet. It would almost be like having studied all these martial arts in a dojo, then when someone messes with you in the street you forget your fancy moves and lose the fight.

Is this a phase that all of us go through on the way up the mountain? Does this get better over time? I need to become quicker and be able to think in the moment. Because I'm seriously pissed at myself right now. I got a failing grade out in the field today because I couldn't think quickly enough.

 

[Obsidian]

Don't jump through hoops for women...They're not worth it. Just focus on having fun.

 

[Max Power]

Same thing here.

I'm relatively new to PUA ****. I am gradually getting better but It's not noticeable each approach -- except I can take getting blown out better each time. It just seems that some days my game is stronger than others. I'm still a recovering AFC.

I compare it to a baseball pitcher whose offspeed pitches are awesome some days and not on others.

What I find is more important than rehashing conversations is maintaing your frame. If you can maintain a confident, fun, frame, keep yourself a mystery, not lean in, don't supplicate or seem needy or let the convo get boring than your inner AFC won't sneak out of your mouth as much. But some nights the **** tests just come so rapidly it wears you out or some times you just can't stay on.

 

[NickBe]

It is not about having the correct reply to everything, just be charmign and funny.

 

[speakeasy]

I remember in Top Gun when maverick said, "if you think, you're dead". I'm feeling the game is the same way. The game has to come from within, if you start thinking too much about it, you will be dead in the water. You can only read and analyze this stuff so much and then you have to start making the game part of who you are on a more visceral, instinctive level. I have some time to go before I get there.

 

[MrS]

It's gotta become reaction.
Which, sadly comes from a lot of practise.

 

[wheelin&dealin]

What I find useful is reading and talking to myself out loud(no bs). You will be way quicker in conversations. Maybe throw in a bit of freestyle rapping in there, and you'll be good to go. It gives you a better mind-mouth connection and gives you a quicker wit.

...just don't do it in public, because you may look a bit crazy.

 

[Ricky]

I remember in junior high and high school where guys would make fun of each other. You'd always be pissed because you thought of the best put down after the verbal battle already took place.

With picking up girls, it's totally practice related. You have to sarge alot to get really good at it.

I'm out of practice. In a great LTR but saw a real cutie today at the gym. As it happens we left at the same time and she held the door for me.

We walked side by side silent for some time. I had nothing. Later as she walked ahead of me I saw something to comment on, but it was too late.

If I see her again, I must sarge her.

 

[sexybeast]

It's like I'm having trouble thinking on my feet.

Maybe.

i would say you need to relax.... when your not relaxed thats when the brain will freeze up and everything you have learned [even if its interalized] wont free flow into the conversation. Honestly relaxing is pretty f*cking important in this game.

Next time your chatting up a girl and feel this way tell yourself to "just relax theres no need to be all tence", slow your thinking down, and notice how you quicky chill the f*uck out and relax.

 

[aussiegoat55]

I've had this happen to me before. Seinfeld did an episode on it where George thought of the perfect comeback but only after the argument. It's known as...

[[L'esprit de l'escalier (literally, stairway wit) is a French term that describes the predicament of thinking of the right comeback too late. Originally a witticism of Denis Diderot, the French encyclopedist, in his Paradoxe sur le Comédien.

The phrase can be used to describe a riposte to an insult, or any witty, clever remark that comes to mind too late to be useful—when one is on the "staircase" leaving the scene.

This expression dates from a time when the word esprit, which now means "spirit" or "mind", meant more commonly "wit" (though mot d'esprit still means "witticism").]]

[[From wikipedia]]


I believe it's all about confidence and your composure. Calm down, be in control of the situation, keep your composure, pause, say the first thing that comes to mind.

When you're nervous you don't always think of the perfect things to say then you look back on the moment over analyzing it. Dont!

Just let it go and be sure to slow down and keep your composure next time.

 

[Max Power]

The Jerk Store called and they're out of you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=igqJdo8ciyU

 

[Frosted]

I had the same problem when I started approaching women about a year or two ago, still do on occasion. Experience is the only real cure. When I was starting out I was pretty into MysteryMethod and stuff and basically memorized like 100 different combacks or conversation starters for any situation and wrote out like 20 funny/interesting stories about myself and memorized the **** out of them until I could just pop them off nonstop whenever the conversation became dull.

After my confidence and experience went up I just started letting things flow naturally and dropped most of the canned line stuff, and I've had about the same success really but don't feel like a dumbass or bored when having conversations anymore.

I was a really bad conversationalist to start out though, that was 90% of what I believe my problem with getting women used to be aside from a few afc behaviors, I was boring, so I wouldn't suggest going that route unless you are really bad like I was.

 

[nicenomore]

dude... its totally practice based.. slowly you get good at it..

come to think of it , in a dojo you practice fighting daily and you slowly see the results after maybe a few monhs..
thats the kind of commitment you need ... slowly you're reflexes become quicker