Things were going soo smoothly!

[Avsguy01]

Ive been seeing this girl for a few weeks. Things have been pretty good between us. The last time we saw each other we ended up engaging in sexual activities. Now we didnt get all the way (3rd base), but that didnt bother me one bit. Well weve talked throughout the week and last night she brought something up. I dont understand why she did this, but she went ahead and betted her friends that she could last 4 months without having intercourse!! This girl is pretty cool and all, smart, attractive (in my eyes), and has a fun personality, but now if i have any chance of having sex with her i have to wait 4 months! Arggg why the hell do females do this! Granted she said shell take care of my urges other ways but damn!

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

It's a test.

She wants to see if your in this for the action, or if you really want to be with her.
I'll bet money that she has no such "bet" going.

Think about it.

Why would anyone who is remotely normal/mature and sexually active ignore her own sexual needs just over a stupid little bet, probably at the expense of a relationship?

I don't know too many girls who could willingly go 4 months without getting some.

This is definitley a test.

don't play along.


The Bad Ass Canadian

 

[Avsguy01]

Well ive already told her i bet she wont last.

 

[Avsguy01]

So how do you considering going about doing this? Id definately like to get to know this girl so i wouldnt consider nexting cause of this but in the same token try to get her to break the bet. I see her tonight at my christmast since i am taking her.

 

[Austin Allegro]

This sounds like major BS to me. How the hell old is this chick, 14??

So she won't have sex, but will 'take care of your needs other ways' so I don't think she just wants to make sure you only like her 'for her personality'.

My guess is she's scared to have sex or doesn't want to for some reason, but is using this 'bet' as some kind of ASD.

She's banking on the fact that in four months you'll either be: a) a supplicating AFC or b) you'll be gone and some other sap will have taken your place who will be told the same thing - repeat process above from step a.

I'd stick with her but make sure you get the 'other ways' she mentioned, and see how it goes, but don't get your hopes up.

 

[Avsguy01]

Well what she told me last night was her whole of point of being in a relationship not just for sex. We got pretty hot and heavy pretty quick and i think i scared her. Thats why she is pulling this on me. Do i need to have sex with her to enjoy her? No, thats why in a way it may be worth holding out. Last night i agreed with her on it, just cause she put me on the spot and i didnt want her upset, but i know for one this has put the power in her hands and i cant allow her to do that. Yes i will definately keep a look out on her promises to please me in other ways. To me im gonna be just as sexual towards her as i was before. I also want to have a good talk to her bout this face to face since we didnt last night when she brought it up.

 

[bp1974]

So instead of talking to you about abstaining for four months, she decides to let some stupid bet with her friends determine how your relationship with her develops?

If that's true, that's sh*tty behaviour. And if it's not, and is just a stupid test to see how you react, well, what you do is up to you.

Let's face it, at 21 most relationships don't last 4 months, so chances are if you decide to wait it out and hope she'll keep to her word you'll end up disappointed.

What I don't like about this is it's setting up a power structure - she's keeping you waiting for something she will eventually 'give' you. That's the true nature of this test. It's to see if you'll tolerate her being in charge. Don't forget, you can withhold sex from her too.

 

[Avsguy01]

You know what the best thing to do is not let it get to me! Just do what ive done before. Ill will continue to push her until she tells me to stop. I think thats the best way to handle this situation. Im breaking that bet with her!

 

[shyguy]

what a bluff

Basically she doesnt want to lose you after you bang her plain and simple. so she wants to see if ur commited to her even without having sex first. she will give it to you, ur in just play it cool. wow that is a easy one. why cant i get chicks who say stupid **** like this! i dont even have to think about this one

 

[NatureGuy]

I'd say, if you do other things, what's the
big deal? It wouldn't bother me .
And who knows if it really lasts 4 months !

 

[Avsguy01]

Your right! Its not that big of a deal!

 

[Golden Arms]

4 months of bl0wjobs...no problems here !

 

[drixsa]

any girl that goes out and says in front of me and her friends:

"yea i can go 4 months without needing sex"

is not the kind of girl i would be looking for.

theres a certain ring of immaturity to that statment and just overall uselessness

 

[Ice Cold]

Originally posted by drixsa
"yea i can go 4 months without needing sex"

HEHE

IMHO it means she's not really sure if she can last. I'd get her excited to a point where she can't say no and see what happens.

 

[NewMan]

No, you are missing the point......

It does not matter WHAT she's holding back from you - it's the fact that she's willing to do that over a fvcking bet.

It could be a hug, kiss, BJ - whatever.

So how about this:-

You tell her, that your holding off buying her dinner, because you bet a friend that you would be able to go 4 months without paying for anything for her.

Hmmm - I wonder how she would react to that one.

She'd move on and find a guy who was willing to do that for her.


This is where the power struggle comes in. Women believe they can play these games with guys - because us guys have been pussified - we've put up with this sh#t - or there are at least some men who put up with this sh#t.

If she wanted you bad enough she wouldn't play this BS game with you.

Tell her that.

Tell her that you don't care what the bet is, your not going ot be in the middle of something like this - that your better than that.......

 

[Avsguy01]

Im just gonna play it cool. She may be playing a game but im not playing that type of game. I will find out if she is worthy of a relationship in the coming weeks. I just disagree about coming back with a game or per se "bet"of my own. Thats like taking two negatives and thinking they'll make a positive. So again im just gonna play it cool, take my bj's and see if this thing progresses any further.

 

[NewMan]

I certainly didn' tsuggest you come back with a bet of your own.

It was a "I wonder what she would say" question - ment for you to think about it.

I certainly would suggest you talk to her and tell her though that you are not interested in being a pawn in some bet that she's had.

Tell her to call you in 4 months after her bet is over, when she can actually come to the table and be herself.

The lack of sex is not the issue - it's the BS game playing that is.

You have to put down the presedence at the start of the relationship - otherwise you'll be tested like this thoughout your time with her.

 

[jester123]

listen to me

You lost this girl because yo lacked a major male character trait
You where not being a challenge! you put your heart on yor sleeve and she knew she had ya!!
You have one salvation....maybe
stand up to her -be firm and confident as hell and tell her about all the bs she put you through-in a nice and funny way of course, then let her know you care-now dont get sappy and wimpy dude, but arent going to wast your time with her anymore. then start dating other women and never call her again. I guarantee she will get back with you.

 

[WaterTiger]

Originally posted by NewMan
No, you are missing the point......

It does not matter WHAT she's holding back from you - it's the fact that she's willing to do that over a fvcking bet.

It could be a hug, kiss, BJ - whatever.

So how about this:-

You tell her, that your holding off buying her dinner, because you bet a friend that you would be able to go 4 months without paying for anything for her.

I totally agree with NewMan on this one. Why is she playing games with you about the relationship...and why are you letting her? Why is the bet with her friends more important than you? Is she a psyc student doing tests? Are you a lab rat?

By letting her go this far with it you've given her "CONTROL" of YOU! If you break up with her she can guilt you with the "you just wanted sex" line. Games like this are not part of a healthy relationship. Holding off on sex to see how the realtionship is going is one thing...but to do it as a bet is just purely insulting.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

be a man and dont let a ho control the relationship (if you can call it one) - one of the traits of a wh@re is that they want to control
and play the masculine role which meams u become the biatch

y does she have to take a bet to not have sex - how come she cant do it on her own volition - here is why................................... this giga-ho is a superfreak and loves penis and her friends know this so as a dare they tell her to go totally against her naturally wh@reish nature and gives her an impossible mission - go without sex for four months - but of course "what constitutes sex?" the wh@re asks herself - "i am still going to b a wh@re because i cannot totally go against my true nature so i'll just make a pvssy out of him and give him bj's or mabye anal - "u see i am truly a woman of strong character and will - i am liberated from the shackles and lusts of men but not of my own lusts" (sarcasm noted)

she is making a pvssy out of you and her friends are mocking your ass@ and treating u like a test monkey subject in a laboratory and taking notes of your afc behavior -- let someone else be their specimen -- dont' be her monkey!!!!!

"I know PRLl but i like her and i want a relationship with this ho" - to that i say "ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST!"