There needs to be a DJ Bible for online dating

bobbob

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That's the one thing that's really missing. I have no idea how you transition from emailing a girl a few times or having a couple IM convos, and then getting them comfortable enough to meet you in person. A lot of them are worried about their safety, they think people online are rapists. Plus how do you deal with the fact that most of them want pics, and some of us really aren't that photogenic.

If any of you are doing great online, please post here what your are doing! Peace
 

rgeere

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Originally posted by bobbob
If any of you are doing great online, please post here what your are doing! Peace
I didn't really have much success with on-line dating until I got frustrated with my computer and threw it out a 2nd story window into a dumpster.

After I did that I had no choice but to ACTUALLY MEET THE GIRLS IN PERSON and I couldn'tkeep them away from me either.

And I got lots of fresh air in the mean time too.

So, my friend, that is how you become successful with on-line dating.

Ohh yeah, and blame you previous unsuccess on the fact that it is a wussy way to meet anyone decent in the first place.

Except for maybe a few rare jems of course.
 

Unforsaken

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If she want a picture. I would search google for the ugliest guy I see and tell her that me. I say "Don't I look sexy". If she keep at it, I would say "I don't want you to see me, you might fall in love with my looks and start to stalk me". (get a camera if you real deperate or use someone camera )


Ever thought of using the phone as the middle step?..once she comfortable with you ask for her #. It make her feel better, because she actually hears you. Then ask her to go with a group of friends that are girls and you take a group of guys (positive your friend will think your the man for hooking them up with blind dates).
 

Tempest

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i've done quite a bit of online dating. i'm slowly getting better at the real life approaches, but it's happening.

anyways, as for online. first thing you need to get handled is to have pictures. no matter which girl you meet, you're going to HAVE to show her a few pictures (in order for her to trust you). now, i'll share with you something which i did. i borrowed a digital camera from my friend, and took a LOT of pictures. probably about 100 pictures in a day. i used different t-shirts, gelled my hair differently, took pictures of me with my hair wet out of the shower, outside, inside, different lighting, etc... now, i took the top 20ish good pictures (believe me, a lot were horrible that i was extremely insecure with). with the top 20 good pictures, i joined one of those online photo albums, and put them all there. then, i went to buddypic.com, found about 30 different amazingly HOT girls from all around the world, said to them "hey, are you busy? i need a female opinion on something. i have a bunch of pictures and i'd like to know which you think are the BEST ONES." they gave amazing advice and input. after that, i managed to narrow down to like 5-7 really good pictures of myself that i was comfortable with that i could send out. also like to know that it was a HUGE ego booster having quite a few of the girls telling you that you're hot, attractive, or whatever.

with a lot of the really attractive girls i talked to from across the world, i PRACTICED a lot with them. i used C+F lines, was ****y, indifferent, etc... i tried different things, and saw the different responses/results i'd get.

now it's time to FIND the girls. sites like hotornot are useless. you're unable to contact the girls, which is lame. the sites which i get good results from are: buddypic.com, facethejury.com and nexopia.com. if anyone has any other good ones which allow you to get their contact, then let me know.

narrow your searches. ONLY bother with the ones that live within 30 minutes away. i've had to disqualify a lot of girls because they've lived too far.. that sucked. anyways, just go through the profiles/pictures, and get their contacts.

this is where the magic begins. i started out with a few C+F lines which i've come up with myself, or have heard from friends. they are GOLD. now it's like i don't even have to think when i use them. i end up saying the same things to every girl, pretty much. i've managed to get some of the girls on the phone INSTANTLY just by messaging them a few times. in minutes/seconds, in fact. some are different. some are shy and you have to develop rapport and trust. one thing you want to keep in mind is.. you don't want to talk to them TOO MUCH. avoid this. talk to them for 5-10 minutes, then end it. ALWAYS BE THE ONE TO END INTERACTIONS. always leave them wanting more. keep value to yourself. once i make them laugh, or know i'm connecting with them, i use the line "let's have a conversation like normal people... on the phone." this usually works. sometimes i've even randomly blurted out my number and said "i don't hear my phone ringing." don't be afraid to bring it up.

anyways, once you're on the phone with them... maintain the C+F. act the same way as you would online. do not talk to them for hours, though. i like to keep it around 10-30 minutes, depending on the person. again, some need to trust you. talk about whatever... if you do this enough, you will know what to say/do and it will come natural. you can just ask her "what're you doing this weekend?", or "when are you available this week?" then you can make the plans. sometimes they'll flake out, it's a pain, but you eventually learn to deal with it. there are tons of methods to prevent that, which is another story. i usually like to get them to come shopping with me or something... and i meet them at the mall.

there are many ways to go about this. it's not that difficult. in fact, it's EASY. the difficulties i'm having are with REAL LIFE meeting the girls. i know if i can get their e-mail or phone number.. then it's OVER. i can follow up nicely and dominate. the whole online chatting thing is an important part of my game. i'm pro at it.

if you're interested in hearing a few things that i use, just ask. i wouldn't mind sharing... a lot of them are great C+F lines which i've learned from friends, etc... that work in every situation. if you're interested in reading an actual CONVERSATION i have with a girl online that i get their number.. i'll post that as well. let me know.

hope this helped.
 

Tempest

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one thing which i forgot to mention is that i think ONLINE DATING is the BEST way to get started if you're new to this. i'm new to this, but it has helped me TREMENDOUSLY. if you're not ready to meet girls in real life yet, sit in front of a computer and meet women online. gain experience, learn how to communicate with them, meet them in person, and just LEARN. i still do this as my main way of doing things. i've so far made it a goal of myself to have one date a week. now i'm getting beyond this and i'm spending weekends going to the mall and doing approaches.
 

bobbob

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Tempest, that was an awesome post. 1000 pics is a lot of pics. Did you take them yourself, in the mirror? I'm not about to ask a friend to take pics, that would be a little fruity.

Please post examples of how you got numbers that fast, examples of C&F, etc.

I've been able to generate some interest before posting a pic, but then as soon as I send a pic, I never hear from the girls again. I know I'm not the best looking guy in the world, but damn, I'm not ugly either.


And for the person above who said "just get out in the real world" ... yeah I do that too, I completely agree with you. But that's during the day! At 10pm at night on a weekday there aren't too many places to go to meet women, so I try online if I don't have any work to do. That's too bad you threw out a perfectly good computer as well ...
 

Soma

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Here's your advice...

Do a search!

I don't know how many times I, and other people here, have talked about this and given real life examples on what to do.
 

Tempest

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Originally posted by bobbob
Tempest, that was an awesome post. 1000 pics is a lot of pics. Did you take them yourself, in the mirror? I'm not about to ask a friend to take pics, that would be a little fruity.

Please post examples of how you got numbers that fast, examples of C&F, etc.

I've been able to generate some interest before posting a pic, but then as soon as I send a pic, I never hear from the girls again. I know I'm not the best looking guy in the world, but damn, I'm not ugly either.


And for the person above who said "just get out in the real world" ... yeah I do that too, I completely agree with you. But that's during the day! At 10pm at night on a weekday there aren't too many places to go to meet women, so I try online if I don't have any work to do. That's too bad you threw out a perfectly good computer as well ...
sure thing. okay, one thing which i forgot to mention which is somewhat important is developing a profile. create a good, C+F profile which will catch her attention and don't be afraid to be selective, either.

as for the pictures, it probably wasn't that many. it was probably like 50 pictures. i didn't take them with a mirror. i would go outside, and just hold it up facing me and take it. or i would set the timer and rest it on a ledge and jump infront of the camera.

okay, as for the C+F things... a few lines which i notice i've used a couple times are:

ME: "how come you don't have much written about you in your profile?"
HER: "what do you mean"
ME: "hobbies... sports... thong or granny panties"
ME: "you know, the important stuff"
(this usually makes her LAUGH, our flip out in a funny way, great reaction either way)
ME: "it's cool though, you don't need to be ashamed that you wear granny panties"

(i got that one from a good friend, which i'm sure he isn't aware that i use)

whenever she makes a comment about you:

HER: "you're cute", "you're ****y", "you're funny"
ME: "why thank you my smartypants new friend", or "thanks for noticing"

HER: "how old are you?"
ME: "old enough"
ME: "to know better"
ME: "to answer a question like that!"

HER: "how old are you?"
ME: "why, you looking for someone to buy you beer?"

whenever she says she has to go:

ME: "oooh.. hey, the street lights are on... time for bed, eh?"

whenever i make an offer (such as phone number):

ME: "want to have a conversation like normal people... on the phone?"
ME: "hurry up, this offer is only available for another 20 seconds"

whenever she makes a direct, sexual comment or whatever:

ME: "i'm locking my door tonight!"
ME: or... "no funny business though, okay?"
ME: or... "i'm not THAT easy!"
ME: or... "sorry, you're just going to have to keep your hormones in check young lady"

when she's being a *****, untalkative, ignoring you:

ME: "is it just me... or are you just the most socially unadaptable person EVER?"

when she takes too long to respond:

ME: "what, playing hard to get already?"

when she gets upset to something you say:

ME: "lol... loosen the panties, dork"

other things which i like to do is accuse them of secretly being a man, secretly being 50+ year old pedophiles trying to pickup on me, accuse them of stalking me, etc... i call them brats, brattypants, dork, dorkfus, etc.. i make up funny nicknames.

there's SO MUCH you can do. i just have fun with it.

i'll post a good example.. just let me find a good log.
 

CapiCrimini

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Do you not notice the sticky that says there are already too many bibles?
 

Eternal

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There is a post in the Archive about online dating. Check in there.
 

bobbob

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Thanks for the examples Tempest


No I didn't notice the sticky, nor do I see any post in the archive about internet dating


I need some advice though ... there's one girl I'd like to meet in person. She goes to the same school as me. Initially she agreed to meet me on campus, but after I sent a pic, she didn't email me again.

I still want to meet her though ... so how can I play off the pic to get her interested in meeting again?
 

S0LID

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I've met about 6 girls this year off the net.

I go on 1 of them sites, messege all the local talent. Saying "nice profile and pictures!. Do you have MSN?". Add the ones who reply to MSN. I talk to them and if the convo goes well, as in we both keep the convo going, instead of me doing all the work, I'll make them a "candadate". I don't talk to them hours and hours as this leaves you with little left to say in person. I don't give any of my past away and info about me. After a few days I have a solid rapport. I then ask for their number and ask them to meet me after about 2 days to 2 weeks.

I normaly meet in a public place. As I'm in college meet them at their college for dinner (time limit). I act realy confident and don't tell anything about myself, remaining a mystery.

The last girl I met who will probs end as my g/f said "I've never been nervous meeting a guy but when I met you I was shaking".

I'm realy good at making first impressions, but when I started meeting grls off the net I was teriffied and ballsed it up.

I got her so nervous and exited that she was going hyper.

1 mistake I made though is I asked if she was busy on a weekend for the 2nd meeting. Should ask on a tuesday. I'm now meeting her next wednesday.

I more than less got called a AFC last time when I posted my report by saying I'm letting her do all the work. I didn't explain how into me she is and that I am the 1 asking to meet again, still being a dj so dw.
 

TooColdUlrick

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Re: Re: There needs to be a DJ Bible for online dating

Originally posted by rgeere
I didn't really have much success with on-line dating until I got frustrated with my computer and threw it out a 2nd story window into a dumpster.

After I did that I had no choice but to ACTUALLY MEET THE GIRLS IN PERSON and I couldn'tkeep them away from me either.

And I got lots of fresh air in the mean time too.

So, my friend, that is how you become successful with on-line dating.

Ohh yeah, and blame you previous unsuccess on the fact that it is a wussy way to meet anyone decent in the first place.

Except for maybe a few rare jems of course.
you don't know what you're talking about. like anything else, it's a learned skill. it's an accepted medium. it will be 'more' accepted looking forward.
 

Owned

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Why is HotOrNot bad? Unless I am missing something, you can email ppl directly there...
 

DJ_Dork

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Online Dating is no different from real life dating.
 

cannibustacap

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Originally posted by Tempest
Online dating examples....
Thats all from DYD isn't it? What David says is ****y-Funny is also Neg-hitting. From what I read hear you only want to do a few neg-hits to HB8,9,10s.

The Difference between C&F and Neg-Hit, Pos-Hit and Dj's and the tools of the Trade.

Great thread relating the two. So be careful with some of David DeAngelo's advice. You have to be really good to pull it off (and I don't mean copying and pasting). Tailor it to you, be congruent. Even David says and emphasizes that. Be Congruent. Personally I wonder how well David's lines work for the average DJ. I don't know David's success rate and I don't know what type of girls he goes for either.

However I am definitely not saying you aren't good. Don't get me wrong at all. But for me... I can't pull off all that Neg-hitting, C/F shat and still remain congruent.

Tell us your success with using all the ****y-Funny lines so relentlessly?
 

Tempest

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yeah, most of those are from deangelo.

also, SOLID nailed it right on! i'm like exactly the same as you, dude. we both go through the same process.

anyways, the whole C+F attitude is just completely congruent with me... because that's the personality which i've adapted to. when i initially started using this stuff... i completely OVER DID it. i was extremely ****y, and somewhat of an *******. in fact, i have a pretty decent thread to share with a log which i provided awhile back:

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=55878&highlight=petros

that thread is a pretty good example of a lot of the things which i say, HOWEVER, that was when i was starting out and i completely over-did it. i realized that from that thread, made a few changes, now i'm more congruent and more civilized in my interactions. you need to find that balance between "nice guy" and "jerk". it's the middle of the equation. you want to be that "cool, bad boy", which is somewhere in the middle. start off slow with this stuff... i don't generally throw ALL of those lines in at a conversation at once.... now i usually throw them in when the opportunity arises, or when the conversation is getting stale... then i might have more of a "civilized" conversation, and maybe compliment them.

now, i use the EXACT SAME attitude in real life. what're the reactions you get? you get that "oh my, you azzhole!" with a BIG smile on her face. or i get really flirty punches, which give me the opportunity for me to spank them back. i've used WAY worse stuff in real life, and i just get good results with it.

anyways, as for bobbob. e-mail her back and say, "what, playing hard to get already?" let me know if you get an e-mail back then. also, do you have this girl on MSN? that might be an easier way to communicate with her.

if you havn't already, you should check out some of DeAngelo's work. that's what pretty much ALL of my methods are based on. i'm a huge fan of this guy. i listen to him everyday.
 

S0LID

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1st time I met a grl off the net was a horror story! I told her everything about me, waited months b4 I met her, waited for her to come home n I'd be online waiting, her personality sucked! plus she looked well diffrent on web cam compared to in person. I nearly ran away when I met her. What a waste of my time.

2nd grl talked to for 4 days :eek: and met her in a club. She lived too far away though. I did kiss her, coulda gone further but got dragged out early due to transport.

3rd grl, 2 weeks this time. she wasn't bad looking (not as hot as her pics) but had nothing to say as I told her all my personal details. I was was a bit shy still. I ended up having her as a friend and was gonna get with her best friend but she had too many issues.

4th grl, she was a bit obsessive, not bad to look at. We met at a bar where I got smashed n was acting like tom green.

5th grl is the last 1 I met where I started doing things properly.
 

backbreaker

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you won't find one, because being an ONLINE DJ is an oxymoron in istself.

A DJ... That can't talk to people in person and would rather look at a computer screen rather than the beatuiful eyes of a woman. A man that is too caught up with the internet to get out and really enjoy the world. Now there is nothing wrong wtih the internet... I own an internet company, but you get my point.
 
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