The year I met my soulmate

[corrector]

That year was 2012. I can remember how things were before she came into my life, and how I thought that it would have just been an ordinary year, like the many years before. This didn't happen with any other woman before or afterwards.

Even when I got married in 2014 with another lady, the period of time before meeting my ex-wife has virtually no resonation that I can say I didn't expect that year would turn out that way. No other event prior comes to mind even before 2012, that I would think, this is going to be another normal year and then look at the rest of the year differently when anything happened. This includes a trip to Italy, Israel and Trinidad.

I'm trying to wrap my head around an 9 year old memory now. It's like I just remember this time before meeting her, and didn't expect that year would turn out like that that even the time before meeting her looks different.

Does anyone have this same effect with anyone special they met that within that same year, when you look back the months prior to meeting her, the meaning is fundamentally changed because you believed it was just going to be another ordinary year?

 

[Bible_Belt]

I wish we could be friends in person so I could punch you when you said things like this. And I mean that constructively, I promise.

 

[corrector]

I wish we could be friends in person so I could punch you when you said things like this. And I mean that constructively, I promise.

You mean this is extreme blue-pill?

 

[Bible_Belt]

You mean this is extreme blue-pill?

Yes, and the larger issue would be that dwelling on things like this is not productive and likely detrimental. You can't control the decisions you made in the past, only the present and future.

 

[corrector]

Yes, and the larger issue would be that dwelling on things like this is not productive and likely detrimental. You can't control the decisions you made in the past, only the present and future.

You mean flashbacks? You don't really dwell on it. Its more like a mystique or wonder that surrounds it. So you really don't have a year so grand or happy enough that that year sticks out compared to other years? In time, allot of things just weave in and out so there are not pre or post impressions about almost any event. This one seems different as it doesn't have the same bland weave-in & weave-out feel.

 

[Barrister]

Corrector is an anomaly. Apparently he’s both blue pill and black pill all at once.

 

[corrector]

Corrector is an anomaly. Apparently he’s both blue pill and black pill all at once.

I guess the relationship ending abruptly near the end of that same year because of issues outside the boundaries of that relationship has given it this weird effect. If it was allowed to play out to a natural end (if it eventually ended or I got hurt), then there would at least be something to taint up the memory. It gives it that orphan memory that nothing felt like it went wrong enough within the relationship itself to undermine the memory of the great moments of it. So its like an encapsulated blue-pill within the black-pill. It just feels like a good relationship was aborted so that it can just remain a good memory through time, although there were logically sound reasons for ending it.

 

[corrector]

My mother also noticed some changes with her too. She didn't dress that well before we got close with each other. Then afterwards she started dressing up like a doll. It's again a nuanced observation. Again, can't see why the period BEFORE anything developed is that interesting.

The only thing I can say is I met her using an online Christian dating website. Allot of people rejected me on there, but she reached out to me and we connected. I've have not been doing any online profiles or dating on that site. So obviously that's one thing I'm doing differently today compared to back then. I accidentally bumped into her profile back in 2016 and found out that she lived in New Zealand. I quit the site not long after that. Maybe its time to put up a new profile on there since you only need that lightening strike with one woman.

 

[buddhafukko]

This is a PUA forum sir, you really shouldn't still believe in the notion of soulmates. Many young children believe in santa clause but even the most bluepilled normies more or less understand the notion of soulmates is a childish delusion.

 

[andreihaha]

My mother also noticed some changes with her too. She didn't dress that well before we got close with each other. Then afterwards she started dressing up like a doll. It's again a nuanced observation. Again, can't see why the period BEFORE anything developed is that interesting.

The only thing I can say is I met her using an online Christian dating website. Allot of people rejected me on there, but she reached out to me and we connected. I've have not been doing any online profiles or dating on that site. So obviously that's one thing I'm doing differently today compared to back then. I accidentally bumped into her profile back in 2016 and found out that she lived in New Zealand. I quit the site not long after that. Maybe its time to put up a new profile on there since you only need that lightening strike with one woman.

1. The only time when I idealized a past relationship was when I was single and not meeting women, getting thirsty.
The important thing to remember is that the relationship broke for a reason. Living in the past is both depressing and stopping you from seeing what is in front of you right now.

2. If she had qualities you usually find in Christian women, maybe look for someone with the same profile.

 

[andreihaha]

please go and write something along the same lines in the thread about escorts. The thread where a lot of the cartoon alphas on here admit to paying hookers / escorts and liken it to the same or better value as dating women.

Simp behavior.

Is it a pua forum though? hard to tell these days.

Everyone knows SoSuave is a support group, duhh.

 

[corrector]

1. The only time when I idealized a past relationship was when I was single and not meeting women, getting thirsty.
The important thing to remember is that the relationship broke for a reason. Living in the past is both depressing and stopping you from seeing what is in front of you right now.

The manner in which it broke still felt more like something was aborted. Which means the integrity of the memory of the relationship and some of its high-points are still intact, even if it comes like an old masterpiece movie. It ended in such a way it was like a movie ending then end credits when you look at a nice movie, but with a tragically bad plot twist ending before the credits start.

You are suggesting there is something infront of me right now? You yourself said you idealized a past relationship when you were single and not meeting women. Keep in mind I was married to my ex-wife 2 years after this ex-gf so I did meet someone and got married to her after the fact. Its not like I never dealt with any woman at all since her.

2. If she had qualities you usually find in Christian women, maybe look for someone with the same profile.

She doesn't have all the qualities I'd find in a Christian woman. The reason I cancelled the "engagement"/aborted the relationship is because she had unresolved issues in her past that were contrary to the Bible. Her past or way she treated her ex-husband would be textbook black-pill and my mother could not see her as a daughter-in-law, and I would be going against the bible if I continued seeing her. Again, you don't really know much about the lady you are dating until you dig in and find the truth about them.

However, the run of the relationship from beginning to end-point, while not flawless, still has that "masterpiece movie" effect. It feels like 2012 is in another dimension of reality. Perhaps all my other experiences with women have been either mediocre or crappy or I'm not able to get a decent match, that this one just stands out. But sometimes Christians ladies can have more skeletons in their closets than anyone else out there.

 

[corrector]

This is a PUA forum sir, you really shouldn't still believe in the notion of soulmates. Many young children believe in santa clause but even the most bluepilled normies more or less understand the notion of soulmates is a childish delusion.

That sounds miserable, but this sounds like a party:

 

[corrector]

Soulmate Dropped For New, Better Soulmate

BLOOMINGTON, IN—The deep and abiding love shared by soulmates Andrew Colton and Brenda Smolensk ended Monday, when Colton broke up with Smolensk to go out with new soulmate Mandy Damrush.

www.theonion.com

I found this song on youtube the last time I wrote an email to her back in 2016. It had a catchy tune and I played it over and over again, but when I looked at the lyrics later I freaked-out and stopped playing it. Makes me think twice about every contacting her again:

There is definitely something bewitching about the whole thing as the song seems to indicate.

Okay, I'll try and keep that out of my mind.

 

[AureliusMaximus]

The year I met my soulmate

Aye,I do to remember this day too in my life son. It was a evening with my friends and it was dark outside..
It was an important day in my life when I suddenly found my one and only...

LMFAO...

[If you don't get this... then here is a hint: It is a joke for fun and giggles..]

 

[corrector]

Now I'm remembering my ex-wife. She would print out parking passes from her computer so my car could park infront of her parents house so I can stay there overnight with her. Well, at least that's one from another woman apart from the ex-gf.

 

[corrector]

Do. In fact stop listening to music with lyrics in it (unless it's Christian music). It's other people's garbage feelings going into your very being.

I propose a diet of HOUSE and CLASSICAL to rid you of your spell that you are under, (Christian is allowed)

Try it as a 90 day challenge. (like the no fap challenge) You are ridding yourself of garbage spell producing music.

House:
Fish go deep podcast:

Fish Go Deep Podcast

Fish Go Deep weekly podcast. Current and classic house music.

godeep.libsyn.com

Classical:
Classical Music Discoveries

Classical Music Discoveries

Listen to Classical Music Discoveries's Classical Music Discoveries podcast on Apple Podcasts.

podcasts.apple.com

Remember garbage in garbage out. It works both ways. Quality in quality out.

But I don't listen to that music today. I'm reframing the narrative of the soulmate post by suggesting there is a really a spell to be avoided rather than a great memory to be cherished, like she's the only and best thing that ever happened in my life.
That post was an narrative account of 2016. I tried to delete that post but the system wouldn't let me.

If you are referencing the Corrs music video in the previous post then I wouldn't call that garbage. With the lines blurred between Christian and secular music (ie Riley Clemmons and even some modern Hillsong), even Corrs sounds good enough. If there is another music video we are talking about that I've posted then I'm all ears.

 

[bat soup]

That year was 2012. I can remember how things were before she came into my life, and how I thought that it would have just been an ordinary year, like the many years before. This didn't happen with any other woman before or afterwards.

Even when I got married in 2014 with another lady, the period of time before meeting my ex-wife has virtually no resonation that I can say I didn't expect that year would turn out that way. No other event prior comes to mind even before 2012, that I would think, this is going to be another normal year and then look at the rest of the year differently when anything happened. This includes a trip to Italy, Israel and Trinidad.

I'm trying to wrap my head around an 9 year old memory now. It's like I just remember this time before meeting her, and didn't expect that year would turn out like that that even the time before meeting her looks different.

Does anyone have this same effect with anyone special they met that within that same year, when you look back the months prior to meeting her, the meaning is fundamentally changed because you believed it was just going to be another ordinary year?

If a woman dumps me and moves to New Zealand, rather than a soulmate I'd consider her an uncooperative bixtch.

 

[corrector]

If a woman dumps me and moves to New Zealand, rather than a soulmate I'd consider her an uncooperative bixtch.

She didn't dump me though. I'm obviously not saying she's my soulmate either outside of the boundaries of the 2012-relationship run-time. She's just an actress that played a part in a life movie.

 

[bat soup]

She didn't dump me though. I'm obviously not saying she's my soulmate either outside of the boundaries of the 2012-relationship run-time. She's just an actress that played a part in a life movie.

Ok, I'll tell you a story. We all probably have exes that we think of from time to time. I used to have one that I still used to think about a lot that I was dating when I lived in Taiwan, which was about 20 years ago. I went back there again recently and went back to some of the places I used to know, like the place I used to live and the place where I met this girl one night and we kissed for the first time.

So I was sitting in this park next to the lake, thinking that the last time I was there I was kissing this girl and I was totally in love with her. I was with her there the day before I left Taiwan and when I left I planned to be back within a few months. Now, 20 years later, I finally returned and this time I was alone and wondering what would have happened if I made different choices in life. Maybe we'd be together now, here or in some other part of the world, or maybe it wouldn't have worked out anyway. Who knows? I know that after I left she met someone else and they're married with children.

I listened to some music whilst I remembered her, felt sad for a while and then I left. And later I realised that the feeling of regret was gone. Somehow it helped me to go back there and remember and create a new memory of that place. Maybe embracing the pain can help you sometimes - you need to feel it fully and then let it go.