The world as I see it

[sifer]

The title I borrowed from Einstein's book and I like it because it fits the theme here. I just want to get something off my chest. Before I do. I just want to take the opportunity, the once in a lifetime opportunity to say - I love you. Thank you. I don't know you, but I know behind the monitor, you care enough to be on this great forum to improve yourself and ultimately improve the world around you.

Hm... so much has changed. I remember I was a poster as gotnone (yep... revealing that for the first time ever.. not that anyone cares really although it is embarrassing). That was 2001. It's 2007. I was here around 1999-2000 as a lurker. I'm 20 now so that's about... almost 10 years. Almost. I've seen it all.

So what changed?

When I was here in around 2001 as a poster as gotnone, the forum wasn't upgraded. We were still using tree-inline (however you call them). Allen the owner of this board was an actual poster among us and others, such as Pook and Finger. Antidump among others (David Deangelo and a few others; David posted under a name that was backward) posted as well. We had say about... 300 or so members? I forget really. Been years and I woke up (just woke up) from a good dream. An epic dream (google that) sort.

My life was never a good one (oh yes, here comes). The thing is, I realized what that statement truly mean. It made me feel sad, made me feel angry, made me feel... humanly. Everyone's life was never a good one. We all went on that rocky boat (save a few, like uh, Paris Hilton).

We all have struggles. Struggles with women, struggles with money, relationship, life itself! What I never got for a few years was this. When I was in 2001 posting, I was gotnone (mostly because I had no name, not because I never got a girl, that wasn't hard when you were in school). I posted under various nicknames (I found out the admins can look at your IP, I didn't know until I started hosting a board myself haha).

Then I posted as another nick that started with K. A-Unit would know which nick that is. That was a short lived nick though because I used it for another underground group. Though SS isn't so underground now is it? Everyone knows about it now.

I posted and mostly gave advice and posted when I wasn't supposed to under GN. Thats' what I didn't get. I was a fool. A major fool at that. I was an emo except I never had the makeup. I had problems. I even dropped school. Boohoo. 2002, 2003, 2004, I posted, life changed as I read the bible. I'm slow I know I know CaptainSlinky (I still never got over that ).

I met many people on this (old days) forum in real life or otherwise AIM/IRC/YIM/hotmail. In fact, few made a username specifically to talk to me. That was because I gave advice when I shouldn't have. I was a fool. I posted under gotnone about weight training (DIESEL was better for weight training), about how to get women (I prefer Pook of course, Gunwitch, even DarkDream), I don't think I ever asked advice though I'm sure I have. Simple questions I look back and would kick my own ass about.

Then I changed everything. I didn't change fast overnight though. I wasn't one of the guys who posted under the ghost forum (the one that let us post our results/journals) and talked about how many girls we got in a night. In about, 2002 or so that was the defining moment. Give or take. Mystery came out with his Method. Juggler and others started alt.sedu, Ross Jeff started his SS and it became more widespread.

The older guys just seemed to have died out or moved on. Everything just disappeared or something. You see, I spoke to Pook in PM often long ago when I posted about financial advice and the like. I gave, rather, I parroted advice when I shouldn't have because I didn't have all of it myself.

My online life. What a waste of time most of it.

 

[sifer]

Now camera in my real life. I am not rich, I am not extremely muscular. I made some cash, yep. I made some muscular gain, yep. Potentials? Tons. I spoke to STR8UP, he was genuine to me. He gave me advice and I took it (it worked). Backbreaker spoke to me and gave me advice, it worked as well. Backbreaker was very genuine to me and I want to thank him for that. I spoke to Gio's wifey, I told her if she could somehow convince her man to give me Pook's email/address IRL so I can send Pook a $10,000 check. Because I owe him more than $10,000 and that much.

You see, I tried to emulate and do what I wrote/posted/expressed (and also read in the bible) on the forum, in my personal journals irl. I did them very successfully despite not as succesful as I dreamed. No I don't have $100 million dollars and two set of Lambhor to show for it. No I also don't have a 300lb under 8% BF to show for it either. Though I could kick ass and defend myself and those I love if I had to (whereas I could not then). I dropped school and went through struggles and there are some key lessons that I've picked up along the way. It's not the lessons from the school of hard knocks, most people on this forum will never pick that up because that's far difficult and simply too hard to sustain a lifestyle of.

I live in New York and I will say this - don't be a stupid. Srsly. Since I was a fool, I thought I was smart. Since I'm wiser off now, now I know I'm not so smart. I learned the hard way when those guys who specialized in what they do crushed me. For example, in real estate, I actually got to be friend with a man who trusted me with $10 mil in funds. Wow. Me? Back then I would take it all and probably lost it. Everytime we had a potential property I would bring it to him before he would OK the deal. I would do the negotiation and such.

Here's where it came in, I was crushed by those who had $100 mil or more not to mention several key figures during that deal making. It is very difficult to compete with companies that is already established and has more fund and source to draw from. Probably that's why the guy trusted me with that much money. Because he knew I was serious about it yet I could not compete so it was a safe thing. The heavier force held me back. When dealing with a seller and there are two group, one is a teenager and the other is several older men/women with a full blown paperwork setup, it's also hard to beat when they have and are better negotiators than you.

Of course, now I would've approached everything differently and done things differently but I learned it the hard way. Everything I brought up during the talk, was shot down. "Full cash", they would reply "nope, full cash with incense".

Lesson one? Learn from the wise, dont' draw from one resource but many. The guys even went as far as to say something during the negotiation that everyone knew they could not pull off (such as "we'll buy you a house, help you move out, and you don't have to pay mortgage for a year").

If I had to do it again, I probably wouldn't get into real estate. Wisdom tells me it is better to start a business. Which is what I'm doing now. So far so good, a lot less competition in what I am doing. Real estate is still the best way to make money but the hardest.

The second lesson. This deals with my relationship. I was never willing to let go. Then I made the mistake of letting go of my relationship when I felt it was no longer "needed". Not a good idea. Everything you do or say comes right back to you. Keep in mind, you set yourself for humiliation (I'm still trying to figure out who that nameless screenname is comic_relief ). Which is what has or might happen to me (hell, I suspect something will come along after I post this).

The whole point? Be willing to accept it and move on. Always be willing to walk away. Always be willing to move on in life. Quit wasting time. I wasted several years ****ing it all up that I would do anything to get those time I wasted back. I played WoW, I played too much handball (NYers would know what I'm talking about it seems). I wasted too much time worrying about my looks. I was insecure. My girlfriend would sometime give me ultimatum of sort, people in business, you name it, they would walk over you if you let it. And if you're willing to walk away, none of this can happen to you.

Girlfriend: Ok, you are going to marry me and have kids and give up your lifestyle. Just get a job, business is too risky.

Something like this, what do you do? You go:

"No" and walk away. Period. She has to deal with it and you have to accept that you are who you are and will not make a lifestyle change for her.

When I say walk away, I meant this mentally AND physically. If you're dealing with a headstrong seller, simple, "ok we obviously can't get to a compromise", get up and say "call me when you decide you really want to do it". And walk away. Plenty of time it works. The seller makes a quick change realizing you are serious and go "wait, ok, fine". I have been able to invest some of that money and make high appreciation gain.

This is the same with your life. If you have bad friends and parents. Ditch them. Dump them. They will drag you down. You can't change people. You can only change yourself. If they aren't budging, you get up and walk away and shrug.

Lesson three? Patience is everything. I have never realized this truth until.. well, let's just say patience is all it takes to get all your dreams realized. The problem is most people misunderstand and think "so I just sit there and wait?" WRONG. Idiot Sifer, you idiot. Wrong wrong wrong. I thought that was patience too.

You take action and wait for the results. Patiently. Period. You sit there and develop a business plan and do it patiently and slowly but quickly. The thing is, it took me very long to realize that easy come easy go. Weightlifting for example. Take creatine cycles, eat 500 calories more than your weight gain calorie needs. Now alternate your workout every week meaning you NEVER do the same workout twice. What happens if you shock and awe your body into adapting to higher growth because it can never adapt to the same movement. The moment you stop though, it all dies out and you're back to square one.

So what do I do? I currently do HST (former 5x5 for several years) and will be sticking to that for several years. I am under 10% BF and am very happy. Hua hua hua. Patience. It'll take a year or so before you realize it, you look in the mirror and you get 25lb of muscles. It'll take about 1lb-2lb every month for realistic muscle gain. Go read T-Nation if you don't think I'm right and realize that good gains are slow. Period.

This applies to everywhere in life, girls, money, you name it. Backbreaker was right, having your own business is like a roller coaster. On good days you feel high off life, on bad days you feel weak and sluggish. Patience is what helps you get through it no matter how good or bad it is.

Lesson four. Stop trying to learn tricks. Stop reading books that says something like "how to get... quickly". Seriously, it's useless. It's a waste of time.

I will quote Deep Dish, a poster here:

The paradigm shifted years ago. It shifted before I ever arrived here in mid-2002. The forum has stayed the same except for the cycle of different usernames and different "PUA" trends. When I got here, Ross Jeffrie's was in, now out of style, and now it's "Mystery" and who else. The fact that the focus on self-improvement has stayed consistent over the years tell much about its validity, whereas the trendish PUA trends speak of its flimsy reliability.

Things like Annihilation Method, or the book The Game, they are all not only a waste of time but money. After you have sex, then what? First thing out of my mouth was "I busted my balls for this?"

Be a superman, superman (Friedrich Nietzsche's, not DC's) doesn't need tricks. Superman wakes up in the morning and laugh for no reason. Superman says yes to life. Superman is what every girl wants. When you walk into a room, and there is one girl and say 20 other guys. What makes you different from those 20 other guys?

Those are the four lessons I feel are important. You'll die one day, a nurse will be a milking you to piss. Quit wasting time really. Instead of sabotaging people, work on yourself. If I have ever learned anything about real estate, it's "opportunity cost". If you have say $100 in your wallet. You go outside and buy something, once you do, other things become unavailable. OC applies to everywhere in life. Wasting time is a form of opportunity cost. That time you could've spent on reading a good book or making love to your girl or improving yourself.

People, remember, you only get this life once. Please spend it wisely. Give up your ego and improve yourself. Because the truth is? Only you will last during that 10, 20, 30, 60 years down the road. Not this PUA bull****, not this "this poster is fake", etcetc. Because my friend, when you are on the deathbed, nothing hurts more than regret. Trust me, I have regrets and I'm here to tell you the last thing you want to feel is regret.

I hope this helps. I haven't posted in so long. Was a couple of months since I posted. Oh ya, and I love you.

I'm out.

 

[sifer]

To clarify:

Lesson one - gain wisdom
Lesson two - learn to walk away/shrug off things, in the words of FC - "let that which does not matter slide" SLIDE!
Lesson three - patience is virtue
Lesson four - internalize what you learn, don't be a social robot

 

[Guoy Darko]

Love these kind of posts. :yes: It should be in the 'tips forum' though, and not the 'anything else forum'.

 

[Aboleo]

Your math is a little off, but you did get a pretty early start... damn. Anyways, you got some interesting thoughts, there.

I think the fear of regret is sometimes greater than regret itself. You are laying in bed one night, looking up at the ceiling in the darkness of your bedroom and it hits you... crushing you. Thinking of the things you did or didn't do. But only for a moment. Denial sets in again and when the sun comes up the next day, the feeling becomes like the shadowy memory of a dream lost in time. Maybe it isn't denial. I'd like to call it strength, but I think I know better than that.

I have regrets. Most of the time I ignore them. I try to hide that pain though I am sure that it's always there in clear view of everyone around me. I guess my point is, there ain't nothin' you can do to avoid it. Regret, that is. The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. And if you were standing on the other side of the fence the grass would look greener where you are currently standing. It goes both ways. You do something, you might regret it. You don't do something... you get the picture. But you never really know how it will all go down in the end. You never know how you will feel about what you have done until it's firmly behind you. You wont know until the deed is done. There is no avoiding it, because you can't change your nature anymore than a leopard can change it's spots.

You are who you are and you can't stop what's coming your way in this ol' world. But I think if you are man enough, you can learn to live with it. Now, you might learn a new skill now and then, and you might even set aside a bad habit or two... but you will always be who you are.

Accepting your pain is probably the best way around living in denial. In my opinion, that is so much worse than living with regret. But what do I know-- I'm stoned.:yes:

 

[6-heads lewis]

huh?