The tells of being strung along?

CMNILS87

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Anybody with more experience able to really tell the "tells" of being strung along or just moreso a gut feeling?

My radar of red flags is going off on a possible plate, but her actions are not congruent.

3rd date was last week. She talked about sex literally the whole date and ran with it. I never had to initiate any innuendos. Escalating 1st date, escalating 2nd date, escalate 3rd and it's basically sex in the car but I can't close and she pulls full ASD shutdown. I've been super dominant on her, pulling hair, spanking. Twice I've been turned down to come back to my place to hang out. Of course the subtle come back for whiskey and see the puppy were both shut down. She keeps eluding to more dates down the road.

She makes it easy to set dates and basically gives me prime fri/Saturday nights and is enthusiastic. Passed all her **** tests. I never really get this wish washy stuff. It's either full blown passion in a couple dates or dead in the water.

All of us will say talk to more chicks, care less, yada yada. But when you have a chick all over you, talks sex like crazy, but stops you at the cusp with continual ASD it throws you off. Maybe I'm being too hard on myself and need to lighten up.
 

CMNILS87

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Next date dinner at your place?
Haunted House, because i want to go to one. All the dates I've chose, because i want to go do them and have fun first. i have 2 plates constantly chasing to attention that turn me off and I'm slow playing this one with one date a week max due to my busy schedule and minimal texting to setup dates mostly.
 

Infern0

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Rule of thumb is:

If you think you are, you are.

Correct in 99% of cases, girls who are keen make life easy. Having to ask questions is never a good sign, it means they either aren't keen or have issues.

As above, next date is at your house and if she won't come over or does but won't put out, move on.

It's not like you haven't put in enough groundwork.
 

Shift

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Has only been 3 dates so far. I like the haunted house idea. Definitely would throw out the dinner at your place somewhere along the line. I would say 3 dates/3weeks is too soon to say for sure if she's stringing you along. Sometimes some girls just take a little more time. You're doing it right by keeping it low-investment.
 

wifehunter

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Strung along = cut the string:cool:
 

TheMonkeyKing

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Go ghost for a couple of days, tell her you're busy (make something up). Her interest will soon be triggered. Leave it a bit longer to set the next date. Take her for a drink and a pizza near your place. Don't over-complicate dates. Haunted houses are for entertaining long-term girl-friends, not casual women you just wanna bang.

At this point you're making it too easy for her. Go on a couple of other dates with other women. Satiate the thirst.

It's completely counter-intuitive, but if you leave a girl be, she will contact you if she's genuinely interested; and at that point she'll be dripping wet.
 

RangerMIke

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How much time between dates?

Might be you are putting out the vib that you are too into her. My advice would be back off and go out with other women.
 

dude99

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Anybody with more experience able to really tell the "tells" of being strung along or just moreso a gut feeling?

My radar of red flags is going off on a possible plate, but her actions are not congruent.

3rd date was last week. She talked about sex literally the whole date and ran with it. I never had to initiate any innuendos. Escalating 1st date, escalating 2nd date, escalate 3rd and it's basically sex in the car but I can't close and she pulls full ASD shutdown. I've been super dominant on her, pulling hair, spanking. Twice I've been turned down to come back to my place to hang out. Of course the subtle come back for whiskey and see the puppy were both shut down. She keeps eluding to more dates down the road.

She makes it easy to set dates and basically gives me prime fri/Saturday nights and is enthusiastic. Passed all her **** tests. I never really get this wish washy stuff. It's either full blown passion in a couple dates or dead in the water.

All of us will say talk to more chicks, care less, yada yada. But when you have a chick all over you, talks sex like crazy, but stops you at the cusp with continual ASD it throws you off. Maybe I'm being too hard on myself and need to lighten up.
Sounds like she does like you but may be afraid of being used. She may have been someone elses plate before and not the priority and she may be hesitant.
 

CMNILS87

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How much time between dates?

Might be you are putting out the vib that you are too into her. My advice would be back off and go out with other women.
Hey Mike, it's usually about a week between dates. She'll text she had a great time. I might reply with a wink or thumbs up. Wait a few days and text to setup a date a few days later. She asked me last date why I don't text her often. I just said I text to set dates, if I want to tell you something I'd call or setup a date. Obviously I'm not gonna invest anything/info into a girl that has attention from a bazillion guys. She's asked me on 3 different occasions now if I'm seeing/talking to other girls and used amused mastery to them all.

She flat out said first date she's looking for more than fun, but her track record says otherwise in my mind.

1. Estranged father, kinda bad relationship.
2. Loves weekends in vegas with her gal pals once a year (debauchery)
3. Super sexual and talks about wanting to be kinky. I won't lie, there's definite slut tells here and there.

However she's enthusiastic to next date plans and follows my frame. I scolded her first date about damn phones and she's only pulled it out once in 3 dates to show me a pic of her dad after I approved
 

RangerMIke

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Hey Mike, it's usually about a week between dates. She'll text she had a great time. I might reply with a wink or thumbs up. Wait a few days and text to setup a date a few days later. She asked me last date why I don't text her often. I just said I text to set dates, if I want to tell you something I'd call or setup a date. Obviously I'm not gonna invest anything/info into a girl that has attention from a bazillion guys. She's asked me on 3 different occasions now if I'm seeing/talking to other girls and used amused mastery to them all.

She flat out said first date she's looking for more than fun, but her track record says otherwise in my mind.

1. Estranged father, kinda bad relationship.
2. Loves weekends in vegas with her gal pals once a year (debauchery)
3. Super sexual and talks about wanting to be kinky. I won't lie, there's definite slut tells here and there.

However she's enthusiastic to next date plans and follows my frame. I scolded her first date about damn phones and she's only pulled it out once in 3 dates to show me a pic of her dad after I approved
Well... I can see where you are confused... it appears you are doing everything right. With women like this it is all about timing. There really is nothing you can do about it but be patient, don't press her, see other girls. One rule of thumb that has never steered me wrong is: If you are confused then the woman has flagging or low interest. Since she is still going out with you, her interest level is positive but too low for her to act on it. The only way to drive this up is to make yourself scarce and see other women... if she chases you , then you can work with this... if she does... of well... just cast your line and keep fishing.
 

TheMonkeyKing

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1. Estranged father, kinda bad relationship.
2. Loves weekends in vegas with her gal pals once a year (debauchery)
3. Super sexual and talks about wanting to be kinky. I won't lie, there's definite slut tells here and there.
Ha. This is going to go well ;)

To be fair, she might make a great lover and overly-attentive girlfriend, for a while. That's not to say it should ever get that far, mind. She'll be accommodating other guys and orbiters behind your back, she'll be using her routine to get a free ride in Vegas, and she'll have you right where she wants you: buying dinner and arranging haunted house visits when she's bored.

Keep trying to bang. You'll get there eventually, probably. But this woman is not GF material, so stop spending money on her.
 

CMNILS87

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Ha. This is going to go well ;)

To be fair, she might make a great lover and overly-attentive girlfriend, for a while. That's not to say it should ever get that far, mind. She'll be accommodating other guys and orbiters behind your back, she'll be using her routine to get a free ride in Vegas, and she'll have you right where she wants you: buying dinner and arranging haunted house visits when she's bored.

Keep trying to bang. You'll get there eventually, probably. But this woman is not GF material, so stop spending money on her.
Her dad was a struggling aloof musician and I've played music for my whole life. When I talk about music and eventually playing for her she's soaked like a water park. That and my trump card is my sister owns a dance company in town and both said gal and sister have danced their whole life ballet/jazz all that. I see myself dangling that meeting the sister card because it opens a whole huge social circle of dancer friends to her. So I'd expect her to be on best behavior for a long time.
 

TheMonkeyKing

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Her dad was a struggling aloof musician and I've played music for my whole life. When I talk about music and eventually playing for her she's soaked like a water park. That and my trump card is my sister owns a dance company in town and both said gal and sister have danced their whole life ballet/jazz all that. I see myself dangling that meeting the sister card because it opens a whole huge social circle of dancer friends to her. So I'd expect her to be on best behavior for a long time.
Trouble is sausage, what you expect and what is delivered are rarely, if ever aligned.

It sounds like you want to GF this one up. Which is fine. But just understand there are pitfalls that come with a Vegas-loving, c0ck-tease dancer with daddy issues.

You are lust-blind, that much is obvious, owing to all these things you are trying to do to impress her and 'win her over'. Just don't harbour lofty expectations for someone you hardly know. Also don't be so cavalier about involving strangers with your close friends and family; take that as first hand experience.
 

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You're better off putting her to the backburner. Next time she don't put out, delete her from all platforms. Her confusing you is just her saying she just wants to be friends.

What women do, say, and want are all lightyears apart.
 

CMNILS87

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Trouble is sausage, what you expect and what is delivered are rarely, if ever aligned.

It sounds like you want to GF this one up. Which is fine. But just understand there are pitfalls that come with a Vegas-loving, c0ck-tease dancer with daddy issues.

You are lust-blind, that much is obvious, owing to all these things you are trying to do to impress her and 'win her over'. Just don't harbour lofty expectations for someone you hardly know. Also don't be so cavalier about involving strangers with your close friends and family; take that as first hand experience.
I just realized my error and the enthusiasm for one random chick. Thanks for the parachute back to earth.
 

SgtSplacker

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You think you're the only guy that gets this experience from this girl? If you have already taken her out a couple times, start inviting her over to fuuck instead of so many outings. Time to start being strategic and harvesting the fruit from this tree.

Hey baby I have an awesome night planned out for us that begins at my place. Lay awesome pipe and decide at that point what happens next. Be the guy that she goes to for sex, not the guy she calls when she's hungry or bored. Be the piping guy.
 

CMNILS87

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You think you're the only guy that gets this experience from this girl? If you have already taken her out a couple times, start inviting her over to fuuck instead of so many outings. Time to start being strategic and harvesting the fruit from this tree.

Hey baby I have an awesome night planned out for us that begins at my place. Lay awesome pipe and decide at that point what happens next. Be the guy that she goes to for sex, not the guy she calls when she's hungry or bored. Be the piping guy.
Nice play. I'll let you know the details, if she refuses to hang out and isn't comfortable after 3 dates at my place it's a waste and I can invite 1 of my other 2 plates over.
 

SgtSplacker

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Yeah man you can't be pandering around with these women. If it's serious put in the time, if it's about the lay then get it. Light a candle, buy some wine and cheese and show her the back of your balls. Seriously though...
 
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