The rebound guy??

[Alle_Gory]

So I'm seeing this chick. Broke up with her long time BF awhile ago and she's got a chip on her shoulder because of it. She's seeing someone but she lets me know its not serious and doesn't really care much. She considers herself single.

She's a pretty cool girl and someone I can hang around with for awhile. And yes, she is actually interesting to talk to about a variety of subjects. I am pleasantly surprised.

Thing is I need to know whether she's rebounding or not and take the proper steps. What should I be looking for if she's a rebound girl? And I'm a rebound guy?

 

[pLaYtHiNg]

How long was she with him, how did it end, and how long has she been seeing you? Inquiring minds wanna know!

 

[prairiedog24]

Take my advice and don't worry about the supposed "rebound." I'm no longer AFC at heart, but worrying about complicating things at school and the supposed "rebound" caused me to wait more than 4 weeks, during which time she didn't get a new BF, but she did nicely all but FriendZone me. Nothing official, but she doesn't try to get me to spend the night anymore...

Forget the rebound. If you want it, take it. I learned my lesson this time.

 

[Joe Stud]

Prairie's right... dont take her too seriously for now, just add her to your pantry of plates.

Dad always said "first get the fish in the boat, THEN you can worry about how to get the hook outta it's mouth"!

 

[Alle_Gory]

Ok penkitten, I'll give your some attention...

Something like 3-4 months ago. She was really into him, wanted to "settle down" even though she's against marriage and a boring married type of lifestyle. He wanted to move to another province (Quebec), she offered to move with him and learn to speak French but he didn't want that. Something something something, he was really sorry and he loved her and all that, moved to the new place and started banging someone else within a few days. She was pissed and got depressed for awhile and started seeing this dude now (who's a complete joke btw).

And I hope that feeds your curiosity.

I need to gauge the situation since I don't want to be another rebound guy. She's a cool chick and I might get attached. If I need to friendzone her and focus on someone else, so be it.

Thanks for the advice Joe Stud. That's what I'll do. I'll keep it casual unless there's potential.

 

[RFish]

Do not underestimate the effects of being a rebound guy really. I've personally experienced it and around me have friends happening to them.

While I can say prairiedog24 may be right, and each situation differs from each other because different girls behave differently, I still need to give you a heads up on this. This is just to protect yourself and your mental health.

I do not know how long she is with him, but chicks who are attached for a period of time usually have a certain depth of feelings, that might bounce back one day. Imagine the guy saying "oh baby it was a wrong decision on my part and I'm really sorry."

So now even if you get back with her, it depends how she treats her ex and you can judge the best yourself. She could be using you as a companion which I think the other guy is in for now.

In any case, you can invest your time and money but keep your emotions clear until you are sure of it before you step in. You don't want another "I realized I still loved him afterall" coming for you.

Best of luck

 

[Alle_Gory]

I'm not really sure how she treats her ex, but she did mention she's disappointed she doesn't have enough pictures by herself and with her friends. Or something like that. I'm trying to piece together little bits from the indirect questions I asked her.

I'll keep things in check until I know more. Right now I could care less if I see her again, but it would be nice to spend time with her. That's my current feelings, I'll maintain them that way.

 

[TizZle]

Only Time will tell. I wouldn't invest any feelings for a while.

Hang out with her, have fun with her, and bang her senseless.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

Sounds like she wants to enjoy the single life. You should to and just fvck her when she wants it.

 

[War Against Betaism]

Don't worry about what she perceives of you as. Let's say that she does think of as you a rebound. Who cares? Mold reality into your liking. If you want her to be your girlfriend, go for it. Fvck buddy? All up to you.

 

[penkitten]

Ok penkitten, I'll give your some attention...

Something like 3-4 months ago. She was really into him, wanted to "settle down" even though she's against marriage and a boring married type of lifestyle. He wanted to move to another province (Quebec), she offered to move with him and learn to speak French but he didn't want that. Something something something, he was really sorry and he loved her and all that, moved to the new place and started banging someone else within a few days. She was pissed and got depressed for awhile and started seeing this dude now (who's a complete joke btw).

And I hope that feeds your curiosity.

I need to gauge the situation since I don't want to be another rebound guy. She's a cool chick and I might get attached. If I need to friendzone her and focus on someone else, so be it.

Thanks for the advice Joe Stud. That's what I'll do. I'll keep it casual unless there's potential.

uhm, why are you directing this to me as if i posted in your thread previously?
you could have just pm'ed me and asked me to come give a response.

i feel that walking into this, you see that her last relationship ended with her wanting more from her last one.

chances are that she will end up wanting more from her next one too.

 

[pLaYtHiNg]

uhm, why are you directing this to me as if i posted in your thread previously?

He was making fun of me.

 

[Tekniq]

How long was she with him, how did it end, and how long has she been seeing you? Inquiring minds wanna know!

Is there a reason you type in that eye-raping putrid magenta color? Or is just indicative on how you further want to standout here by being a female or simple mindedness because of stupidity?

"Inquiring minds wanna know!"

 

[Tekniq]

Well Alle Gory, i hate to tell you that you are in fact the rebound guy in this situation. By telling you everything is fine and nothing with that other guy is serious she is basically screaming out at you saying "I still can't forget about that chump i was with"

Though on a positive note, this is actually a great situation if you looking to take advantage of her emotional instability at the moment. Play your cards right here and you could get exactly what you're looking for.

A strategy of mine has been find out where the other guy took her out on a date and take her to the same exact place but show her a much more "interesting" time. This accomplishes the following:
1)Assuming she had a halfway decent time she already has some positive emotions elicited from the previous experience so you can play off that.
2)Familiarity further breeds stability (if you are looking for a relationship with her) and that in and of itself could be enough to make her strictly yours... the stability that she no longer has.
3)You have game. No one else does. That is your mindset, so using that show her a better time that what she had there before and it should work perfectly.

I've tested this on a few occasions and it worked each time. Best of luck.

 

[pLaYtHiNg]

Is there a reason you type in that eye-raping putrid magenta color? Or is just indicative on how you further want to standout here by being a female or simple mindedness because of stupidity?

"Inquiring minds wanna know!"

I type in it because it p!sses you off.

Geez, there's options that no one ever seems to use on this forum, and when someone here isn't a sheep like the rest of you it must be because they're simple minded 'because of stupidity'. Way to make your case. :kick:

Anyhow, I was just trying to have fun with the "inquiring minds" comment. I had wanted to offer some insight after gaining a little background on the situation, but changed my mind after Alle_Gory's sarcastic post.

 

[Alle_Gory]

I had wanted to offer some insight after gaining a little background on the situation, but changed my mind after Alle_Gory's sarcastic post.

That's ok. I got all I need.