The problem with "looks matter".

[TarantulaHawk]

The problem with "looks matter" is that most guys mishear/read it as:

"You have to be a born superhandsome chiseled male model to get laid, or otherwice accept having an ugly girlfriend you have to get by begging for months."

It might be more constructive to say "You have to be her type to attract her". Because that's what it's really about. It's about dispelling the notion that you can "create attraction".

And also what "looks matters" means is that your most fit, in shape, well dressed/groomed version will be more attractive than an out-of-shape version of you... But that's unfortunately not how guys read it.

Guys read it as "so you're saying I have to be a top shelf male model to get laid at all" -> which is why they get so defensive.

They could release a program "How to trigger men’s attraction for land whales" and it could contain only one answer: "Get in shape".

So if out of shape etc. women should do it to look more attractive to guys, men should be doing the same.

You have to maximize your potential first for yourself in your health, physique, appearance, personality, schooling, employment and social skills.

Women will still have a specific type of man they desire regardless if it's you or not but you've expanded your options and raised the tier of looks in the type of women you will be able to get.

Now if you would rather be stubbornly complacent and stay the way you are while blaming everything around you saying life isn't "fair" if women don't just drop at your feet over your fancy "lines" etc. then you could still be able to fvck any woman you wanted, whenever you want, by doing nothing else other than becoming a serial rapist.

Improve yourselves for yourselves or sit around complacent being the source of your own problems.

 

[soden]

In my opinion thats not correct at all.

"You have to be her type to attract her"

As "hotter" in regards of looks, status, etc. someone gets the less women or men care about a specific type.
The different types are just shifting towards only one type.

Just as an example. If you look at Mila Kunis, Megan Fox and Jessica Alba. Theyre 3 complete different types of women, but I am pretty sure 99% of men would take them regardless of their prefered type.


Your theory only works for specific criteria, maybe someting like a full beard or long hair.

 

[bigneil]

It means don't be ugly. Sometimes it's just a matter of dressing better, eating better and grooming more.

It's mainly about your overall power. An ugly millionaire is about as attractive as a broke model. As men, we at least have two avenues to pvssy.

 

[In2theGame]

Looks matter any way you slice the pie IMO. However, it depends also on the type of girl your going after. This is my "ideal" girl looks wise.. I dated a blonde for a while that looked just like her.... http://i.imgur.com/ifLBrpT.jpg..... http://i.imgur.com/PKjYrwE.jpg And although i consider my "game" tight, I got her because she thought i was hot. I remember when i first met her too, Guy after Guy kept on approaching her and kept getting blown out. I was just watching from afar like some sniper lol. Its happened like this always for me. Again, i would like to credit my "game" towards picking up the HB's but I know its how i look face and body wise because my "lines" are very direct and basic.

 

[Peña]

It means don't be ugly. Sometimes it's just a matter of dressing better, eating better and grooming more.

It's mainly about your overall power. An ugly millionaire is about as attractive as a broke model. As men, we at least have two avenues to pvssy.

Man with nice clothes can't hide his ugly face. Ugly man with money gets more pvssy than ugly man with no money. Yes?

 

[TarantulaHawk]

For some girls you're a 5, to some you're a 7. This is why this stuff is a numbers game. Go interview some girls about the celebs deemed "hottest guys on the planet, you'll be surprised. One girl's "10" is another girl's 7.

I'm getting the sense that you take each girl's attraction to you as if it determined your looks to every other girl on the planet (I might be completely projecting, forgive me).

Just go out and try to meet a lot of women, you'll be surprised. One day a 5 will be disgusted by you, the next day you'll meet a 7 who thinks you're the cutest guy ever.

.... What I'm trying to say is, you can only ascertain your "league" through a bunch of experience and see what you can get when you AVERAGE your experiences with a lot of women. Don't be fooled by a small sample size.

- If a 7 crushes on you one day it doesn't mean that you're a "7 magnet", you might just be her type for some reason.

- If a 4 rejects you, it doesn't mean you are a "2".

- Get a lot of experience, and then you'll see where you stand.

- Getting an athletic physique will increase your rank by 1-2 points (unless you're already somewhat athletic)

 

[Peña]

For some girls you're a 5, to some you're a 7. This is why this stuff is a numbers game. Go interview some girls about the celebs deemed "hottest guys on the planet, you'll be surprised. One girl's "10" is another girl's 7.

I'm getting the sense that you take each girl's attraction to you as if it determined your looks to every other girl on the planet (I might be completely projecting, forgive me).

Just go out and try to meet a lot of women, you'll be surprised. One day a 5 will be disgusted by you, the next day you'll meet a 7 who thinks you're the cutest guy ever.

.... What I'm trying to say is, you can only ascertain your "league" through a bunch of experience and see what you can get when you AVERAGE your experiences with a lot of women. Don't be fooled by a small sample size.

- If a 7 crushes on you one day it doesn't mean that you're a "7 magnet", you might just be her type for some reason.

- If a 4 rejects you, it doesn't mean you are a "2".

- Get a lot of experience, and then you'll see where you stand.

- Getting an athletic physique will increase your rank by 1-2 points (unless you're already somewhat athletic)

Ugly man that every woman say is ugly not will get laid. No?

 

[TarantulaHawk]

Ugly man that every woman say is ugly not will get laid. No?

And where is this man? Living "life" in his basement posting online or are we to believe he's already approached every woman on the planet while doing nothing with his appearance?

 

[PeasantPlayer]

Hawk is right. To some women you are hot, cute average, ugly, **** even hideous. I know women who think Clooney is ugly, some think he is ok and some think he is hot. Same with Brad Pitt or Gosling, Paul walker, Tyrese, everyone has their type. Its a numbers game some people are more likely to be rated uglier by more people or some people will on average be rated better looking. Its a numbers and type game, and other factors such as money, status, personality factor in

 

[December_in_NY_1978]

Hit the gym, eat clean, dress well and you will be at least a 7.

And every man who takes your advice will have a Super Model wife too right? Guys at my gym are still struggling doing that. Come out of the Twlight Zone buddy.

 

[zekko]

When I hear women talk about good looking men, I don't hear so much about Clooney or Pitt anymore. Usually I hear about Ryan Gosling or Channing Tatum, and the older chicks tend to talk about Matthew McConaughey.

 

[Dhoulmagus]

Everybody has types and most men would date Mila Kunis, Megan Fox, or Jessica Alba regardless of what their type is. However, girls have types too, but they can afford to be picky about what type of guy they choose.

 

[RangerMIke]

You MUST pass the physical attraction test when you approach a woman you don't know otherwise nothing you say or do will matter. Sorry, this is a FACT. That does not mean you have to be Brad Pitt... but it does mean that you at least have to be pleasent looking, smell nice, NOT have dragon breath, dress appropriately. The better you look, the easier it will be to have success in that interaction.

The OP is right... just be the very best you can. In that intitial interaction that is really all you have to go on. You can not highlight any other attributes you might have (money, status) without coming off as a braggard, which turns her off. You are flying only on your appearance at the start.

What you are attracted to is a funtion of your experience and up bringing. I honestly don;t know why I'm attracted to a certain type, but I am. I'll hit up just about any good looking woman, but the type that immediately turns me on many here would not get. I know, because when I'm out with my guy friends hitting up women, many of them are baffled by what I think is a great looking woman.

I LOVE tall redheads, amber hair, and blonds with blue eyes. I like slender almost thin athletic women (my friends say they are gangly). I don't really like long hair, and I'm more attracted to women with short curly hair... flat chested women don't bother me at all, but she has to have great LONG legs and a nice bottom. She should have nice symetrical facial features, and I'm not at all turned off by women with long noses. One friend of mine joked that a women I'm actually been causually dating for 6 months now looks like 'Big Bird', I think she's near perfect.

Everyone has a 'type' you just have to find the women that thinks you at IT.

 

[Peña]

And where is this man? Living "life" in his basement posting online or are we to believe he's already approached every woman on the planet while doing nothing with his appearance?

The man is everywhere in the world staying lonely. Combing your hair wearing new clothes don't hide an ugly man's face.

 

[sambwoy]

The man is everywhere in the world staying lonely. Combing your hair wearing new clothes don't hide an ugly man's face.

A so-called unattractive woman can get a confidence boost from her 'sisters' the moment she pours her heart out to the **world**. Men in that position often do not get that support. It's just unfair alignment of our culture. Why this is I don't know. Perhaps its not the man's 'role' to be insecure, but it doesn't mean they can't feel things.

We have discussed this before that many women are borderline racist when evaluating a man's looks, even in arenas of life that do not call for it, like in the workplace. You could assume that only the fashion-concious hotties who can look great all the time are the only ones who would pull this cr*p. Not so since guys have started complaining about 1s 2s and 3s being picky.

I suspect from this that looking good is a necessity to get any appreciation of your existence at all, never mind attraction.

 

[VikingKing]

Some women might rationalize any of your physical short comings if you have enough money, game ect.

Hot can be subjective.

 

[synergy1]

This polarized discussion doesn't work on either side of the spectrum. Focus only on ones appearance and you miss out on facets that can help a man greatly. Focusing only on intangibles such as "game" or "self-confidence", but neglect your health is just as bad as the former. Since polarized thinking is simpler, the majority of these stupid debates keep popping up time and time again.

Everyone wants a simple answer to get women. News flash, for most of us there is no simple ****ing answer. You want something? Go out and get it. Stop mentally masturbating over this that and the other thing and take whats yours. Looks, game, who cares. 10 minutes of effort is worth an eternity of posting about it..

 

[G_Govan]

Be realistic.

Everyone has a sense of who they can attract and who they can't. Some people have to get their feelings hurt repeatedly to accept the fact that they cannot successfully hook up with a person who is higher in SMV then they are.

Take Donald Trump for instance. He's able to get women much more attractive than himself because he makes up for it in other more significant ways; money, status, etc. He also meets a certain minimum threshold for these women. Meaning they will "tolerate" sex with him rather than seek him out for it like they would a guy that looks like Brad Pitt.

As a man you can aim higher but realize you need to offer something significant which is proportional to your rating. The more unattractive you are the more you need to compensate or simply settle for someone who's equal or below. Although "equal" is a bit skewed in developed countries which means even that can be challenging.

 

[Peña]

A so-called unattractive woman can get a confidence boost from her 'sisters' the moment she pours her heart out to the **world**. Men in that position often do not get that support. It's just unfair alignment of our culture. Why this is I don't know. Perhaps its not the man's 'role' to be insecure, but it doesn't mean they can't feel things.

We have discussed this before that many women are borderline racist when evaluating a man's looks, even in arenas of life that do not call for it, like in the workplace. You could assume that only the fashion-concious hotties who can look great all the time are the only ones who would pull this cr*p. Not so since guys have started complaining about 1s 2s and 3s being picky.

I suspect from this that looking good is a necessity to get any appreciation of your existence at all, never mind attraction.

The unattractive woman will be with unattractive man. No?

 

[Peña]

And where is this man? Living "life" in his basement posting online or are we to believe he's already approached every woman on the planet while doing nothing with his appearance?

I also had women messaging me out of the blue to tell me how ugly I am and to give me grief for being 5ft 8ins.

He was