Mr. Non-Juan
Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 21, 2005
- Messages
- 87
- Reaction score
- 3
The NON-JUAN Newsletter: Teaching Men to Be Good With Women... by Showing How to LOSE Them!
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Greetings, readers! My name is Mr. Non-Juan! Thank you for reading this post!
Check out my websites:
www.nonjuan.blogspot.com - Read the First THREE Chapters of my book, "From PIMP to WIMP: The Non-Juan's Guide... To Losing the Girl of Your Dreams," order the book; learn all about Mr. Non-Juan and MORE!
www.myspace.com/nonjuan - Post comments about Mr. Non-Juan, and learn about upcoming promotions!
Also...
The Newly Revised Edition of My Book, "FROM PIMP TO WIMP: THE NON-JUAN's GUIDE... TO LOSING THE GIRL OF YOUR DREAMS," is now on eBay!! Simply go to www.ebay.com and type "NON-JUAN" into the search engine!!
And HEY! - IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS YOU'D LIKED ANSWERED, PLEASE SEND THEM TO ME at: NonJuan@hotmail.com!! All letters will be answered on NON-JUAN MAILBAG THURSDAYS!!
Today's Topic...
THE 10 NON-JUAN COMMANDMENTS
There are so many things a guy can do to be a Non-Juan; sometimes it gets hard to choose which ones to do first!
Should you ignore her advances when she's giving you signals she likes you, or should you say something so Non-Juanish it makes her not want to ever talk to you again? Do you wear that stupid outfit that's three sizes too small so she'll know you have no fashion sense, or do you avoid making eye contact with her?
So many choices, so little time...
So, as a courtesy to you, my loyal readers, I am posting up the 10 Non-Juan Commandments. Out of all the things a Non-Juan can do, these rules here are the ones that best encompass the true essence of being a Non-Juan!
Heeeeeeere we gooooooo...
***COMMANDMENT 1: THOU SHALT NEVER HAVE SEX. EVER. ***
It's simple: a Non-Juan's goal is to make sure he never gets with a woman; therefore, sex is automatically out of the question for you! Having sex is a bonding act between a man and a woman, something a Non-Juan should never experience. Why get that close to someone, only to have your heart broken? Keep yourself guarded away from any woman showing sexual interest in you; it can only lead to - well, sex of course - but remember: NON-JUANS DO NOT HAVE SEX!!
***COMMANDMENT 2: THOU SHALT MAKE WOMEN THY IDOL, AND WORSHIP HER DAILY. ***
You must become undistinguishable from the thousands of men who kiss up to her looks every day. Worship the woman you're after by complimenting her all the time on her looks, and lust after her like all the other men. Just because she doesn't want to be with you doesn't mean you should stop bowing down to her - ah ha ha! If she hasn't sent out a restraining order on you yet, you aren't worshipping her hard enough!
***COMMANDMENT 3: THOU SHALT COVER THY NEIGHBORING GUY'S GIRL. ***
Never - I repeat, NEVER - go after a girl who isn't already happily hooked up with someone else! Your job as a Non-Juan is to reach for the obviously unattainable - happily married women or happily involved women - so that you never actually get with them! Instead of going after a girl who's single, you need to chase, pine, lust, beg, and plead to be with a girl with another man! Shortsightedness is a Non-Juan's best friend!
***COMMANDMENT 4: THOU SHALT BE JEALOUS OF "DON-JUANS."***
Yes, the treaded "D"-word that stands for guys who know how to get women - and keep them! Rather than figure out a way to change your skills, you must focus your energy on being jealous of a Don Juan's ability to have ladies flocking to them non-stop. Focusing on another man's success with women will help distract you studying up on ways to make yourself more appealing to the opposite sex.
***COMMANDMENT 5: THOU SHALT BE NERVOUS AROUND GIRLS AT ALL TIMES, INCLUDING WHEN SPEAKING TO, DATING, OR BEING AROUND THEM. ***
Forget that girls piss, fart, curse, backstab, and have nasty tempers like guys do. The more "perfect" you can imagine all women to be, the better chance you have at being in a continual nervous state around them. Always make sure women know you're so worried about not fitting in with their "perfect" world, you have no choice but to become a blithering idiot in their presence. They may feel sorry for you, but they won't stay with you for long!
***COMMANDMENT 6: THOU SHALT CARE WHAT A WOMAN THINKS ABOUT YOU. ALWAYS. ***
Ever hear a woman say "if you want a girl, just be yourself?" Interpret this to mean you must be a nice, butt-kissing version of yourself! After all, women love compliments, right? Women LOVE hearing how they're always the right one in an argument, don't they? And women just LOVE it when a guy doesn't create any kind of conflict whatsoever, right?
Suuuuure they do... just keep on thinking that, and trust me - any woman you try to get with will see you as a "nice" guy. She'll also see you as someone who can't rile up ANY kinds of excitable feelings in her, and while she'll keep you in her circle of "friends," you'll NEVER become her boyfriend!
***COMMANDMENT 7: THOU SHALT DO THY BEST TO APPEAR "PERFECT" AROUND ALL WOMEN. ***
Try to appear like the "perfect" gentleman. Correction: the EXTREMELY perfect gentleman - one who never curses, always eats his food in a structured manner, talks with perfect diction, makes the correct decisions about life at all times, and appears to have the "perfect" family. Women tend to get bored dating "perfect" guys because there's nothing for them to do to help "fix" up the relationship. Heck, half the fun of a relationship for a woman is figuring out what she can fix about it - taking this joy away from her can help deteriorate a relationship faster than a tsunami!
***COMMANDMENT 8: THOU SHALT SPEND ALL THY MONEY ON EXPENDITURES FOR THY WOMAN. ***
I don't care if you have a dollar or one-hundred dollars in your pocket: as of RIGHT NOW, all that money shall be spent on the girl you're chasing! And the higher in price, the better! How else is she going to know you're trying to buy her love? How else will she be able to ponder if you're buying all this stuff for her as bribes for sex? How else are you going to make her feel bad about receiving these items without feeling like she earned them?
Just because you've only known each other for 3 weeks doesn't mean you shouldn't start thinking about buying her diamond rings, right? The more pressure you add via expensive gifts, the better chance you have of her staying around... her apartment, trying desperately not to answer your phone calls!
***COMMANDMENT 9: THOU SHALT LACK CONFIDENCE. ***
Women can sense whether or not a man has confidence in his abilities to attract her. You must always give the appearance that you lack this essential trait, whether it be verbally (telling her stories about how bad you are on dates, how you've never asked a woman out, etc.) or physically (slouching posture, walking at a fast pace, etc.).
You must also genuinely believe that NO WOMAN IN HER RIGHT MIND WOULD EVER DATE YOU. Ignore the fact that there are literally BILLIONS of women on this planet, and that at least ONE of them will find you irresistible - NO! Instead, envision yourself as God's outcast, sent here to earth as an example of what girls should NOT be dating!
***COMMANDMENT 10: THOU SHALT FOLLOW RELATIONSHIP ADVICE FROM OTHER WOMEN, AND TAKE THEIR WORD AS TRUE. ***
In other words: the stuff women tell you they're looking for in a man - "someone who's honest;" "a guy who's not afraid to show his feminine side;" "a sensitive man;" "a man who will cater to MY needs, and understand what I need" - follow it to a T! Ignore the fact that these traits are very GIRLY in nature; remember, you are a NON-JUAN, and Non-Juans aren't trying to be "masculine" anyway! All that does is attract girls!!
From now on, you need to start watching Oprah, admit to girls that you liked "My Little Pony" as a child, cry at every movie you see, and grant every request/order a woman spills out to you! Sure, the advice you'll be following won't keep any girls attracted in you, but at least the perfume you'll be wearing will make you feel pretty on the outside!
And there you go - the Ten Non-Juan Commandments! Print them up, post them on your refrigerator and send copies to your friends!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thus concludes this edition of "The NON-JUAN Post!" If you found this stuff to be insightful, TELL YOUR FRIENDS ABOUT IT!
Also: If you thought THESE tips were helpful, why not BUY Mr. Non-Juan's BOOK?
"From PIMP to WIMP: The Non-Juan's Guide... to Losing the Girl of Your Dreams" is a 135-page guide that teaches you EVERYTHING on how to get girls to NOT want to go out with you!!
The book gives advice on what to say on dates (so the girl will feel uncomfortable), how to dress (so a girl will flee when she first sees you), how to avoid getting close to a girl (so that she becomes inadequate about her ability to care for you and leaves YOU first), and much more!
To Read the FIRST THREE CHAPTERS of the BOOK, click here: www.nonjuan.blogspot.com
To Order the Book, go to my website, or www.ebay.com and type "NON-JUAN" into the search engine!
If you have any questions you would like to have answered, feel free to write me at nonjuan@hotmail.com. Your question will be answered on Non-Juan Mailbag Thursdays!!
That's all for now, guys!! See ya next week!
-Mr. Non-Juan
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Greetings, readers! My name is Mr. Non-Juan! Thank you for reading this post!
Check out my websites:
www.nonjuan.blogspot.com - Read the First THREE Chapters of my book, "From PIMP to WIMP: The Non-Juan's Guide... To Losing the Girl of Your Dreams," order the book; learn all about Mr. Non-Juan and MORE!
www.myspace.com/nonjuan - Post comments about Mr. Non-Juan, and learn about upcoming promotions!
Also...
The Newly Revised Edition of My Book, "FROM PIMP TO WIMP: THE NON-JUAN's GUIDE... TO LOSING THE GIRL OF YOUR DREAMS," is now on eBay!! Simply go to www.ebay.com and type "NON-JUAN" into the search engine!!
And HEY! - IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS YOU'D LIKED ANSWERED, PLEASE SEND THEM TO ME at: NonJuan@hotmail.com!! All letters will be answered on NON-JUAN MAILBAG THURSDAYS!!
Today's Topic...
THE 10 NON-JUAN COMMANDMENTS
There are so many things a guy can do to be a Non-Juan; sometimes it gets hard to choose which ones to do first!
Should you ignore her advances when she's giving you signals she likes you, or should you say something so Non-Juanish it makes her not want to ever talk to you again? Do you wear that stupid outfit that's three sizes too small so she'll know you have no fashion sense, or do you avoid making eye contact with her?
So many choices, so little time...
So, as a courtesy to you, my loyal readers, I am posting up the 10 Non-Juan Commandments. Out of all the things a Non-Juan can do, these rules here are the ones that best encompass the true essence of being a Non-Juan!
Heeeeeeere we gooooooo...
***COMMANDMENT 1: THOU SHALT NEVER HAVE SEX. EVER. ***
It's simple: a Non-Juan's goal is to make sure he never gets with a woman; therefore, sex is automatically out of the question for you! Having sex is a bonding act between a man and a woman, something a Non-Juan should never experience. Why get that close to someone, only to have your heart broken? Keep yourself guarded away from any woman showing sexual interest in you; it can only lead to - well, sex of course - but remember: NON-JUANS DO NOT HAVE SEX!!
***COMMANDMENT 2: THOU SHALT MAKE WOMEN THY IDOL, AND WORSHIP HER DAILY. ***
You must become undistinguishable from the thousands of men who kiss up to her looks every day. Worship the woman you're after by complimenting her all the time on her looks, and lust after her like all the other men. Just because she doesn't want to be with you doesn't mean you should stop bowing down to her - ah ha ha! If she hasn't sent out a restraining order on you yet, you aren't worshipping her hard enough!
***COMMANDMENT 3: THOU SHALT COVER THY NEIGHBORING GUY'S GIRL. ***
Never - I repeat, NEVER - go after a girl who isn't already happily hooked up with someone else! Your job as a Non-Juan is to reach for the obviously unattainable - happily married women or happily involved women - so that you never actually get with them! Instead of going after a girl who's single, you need to chase, pine, lust, beg, and plead to be with a girl with another man! Shortsightedness is a Non-Juan's best friend!
***COMMANDMENT 4: THOU SHALT BE JEALOUS OF "DON-JUANS."***
Yes, the treaded "D"-word that stands for guys who know how to get women - and keep them! Rather than figure out a way to change your skills, you must focus your energy on being jealous of a Don Juan's ability to have ladies flocking to them non-stop. Focusing on another man's success with women will help distract you studying up on ways to make yourself more appealing to the opposite sex.
***COMMANDMENT 5: THOU SHALT BE NERVOUS AROUND GIRLS AT ALL TIMES, INCLUDING WHEN SPEAKING TO, DATING, OR BEING AROUND THEM. ***
Forget that girls piss, fart, curse, backstab, and have nasty tempers like guys do. The more "perfect" you can imagine all women to be, the better chance you have at being in a continual nervous state around them. Always make sure women know you're so worried about not fitting in with their "perfect" world, you have no choice but to become a blithering idiot in their presence. They may feel sorry for you, but they won't stay with you for long!
***COMMANDMENT 6: THOU SHALT CARE WHAT A WOMAN THINKS ABOUT YOU. ALWAYS. ***
Ever hear a woman say "if you want a girl, just be yourself?" Interpret this to mean you must be a nice, butt-kissing version of yourself! After all, women love compliments, right? Women LOVE hearing how they're always the right one in an argument, don't they? And women just LOVE it when a guy doesn't create any kind of conflict whatsoever, right?
Suuuuure they do... just keep on thinking that, and trust me - any woman you try to get with will see you as a "nice" guy. She'll also see you as someone who can't rile up ANY kinds of excitable feelings in her, and while she'll keep you in her circle of "friends," you'll NEVER become her boyfriend!
***COMMANDMENT 7: THOU SHALT DO THY BEST TO APPEAR "PERFECT" AROUND ALL WOMEN. ***
Try to appear like the "perfect" gentleman. Correction: the EXTREMELY perfect gentleman - one who never curses, always eats his food in a structured manner, talks with perfect diction, makes the correct decisions about life at all times, and appears to have the "perfect" family. Women tend to get bored dating "perfect" guys because there's nothing for them to do to help "fix" up the relationship. Heck, half the fun of a relationship for a woman is figuring out what she can fix about it - taking this joy away from her can help deteriorate a relationship faster than a tsunami!
***COMMANDMENT 8: THOU SHALT SPEND ALL THY MONEY ON EXPENDITURES FOR THY WOMAN. ***
I don't care if you have a dollar or one-hundred dollars in your pocket: as of RIGHT NOW, all that money shall be spent on the girl you're chasing! And the higher in price, the better! How else is she going to know you're trying to buy her love? How else will she be able to ponder if you're buying all this stuff for her as bribes for sex? How else are you going to make her feel bad about receiving these items without feeling like she earned them?
Just because you've only known each other for 3 weeks doesn't mean you shouldn't start thinking about buying her diamond rings, right? The more pressure you add via expensive gifts, the better chance you have of her staying around... her apartment, trying desperately not to answer your phone calls!
***COMMANDMENT 9: THOU SHALT LACK CONFIDENCE. ***
Women can sense whether or not a man has confidence in his abilities to attract her. You must always give the appearance that you lack this essential trait, whether it be verbally (telling her stories about how bad you are on dates, how you've never asked a woman out, etc.) or physically (slouching posture, walking at a fast pace, etc.).
You must also genuinely believe that NO WOMAN IN HER RIGHT MIND WOULD EVER DATE YOU. Ignore the fact that there are literally BILLIONS of women on this planet, and that at least ONE of them will find you irresistible - NO! Instead, envision yourself as God's outcast, sent here to earth as an example of what girls should NOT be dating!
***COMMANDMENT 10: THOU SHALT FOLLOW RELATIONSHIP ADVICE FROM OTHER WOMEN, AND TAKE THEIR WORD AS TRUE. ***
In other words: the stuff women tell you they're looking for in a man - "someone who's honest;" "a guy who's not afraid to show his feminine side;" "a sensitive man;" "a man who will cater to MY needs, and understand what I need" - follow it to a T! Ignore the fact that these traits are very GIRLY in nature; remember, you are a NON-JUAN, and Non-Juans aren't trying to be "masculine" anyway! All that does is attract girls!!
From now on, you need to start watching Oprah, admit to girls that you liked "My Little Pony" as a child, cry at every movie you see, and grant every request/order a woman spills out to you! Sure, the advice you'll be following won't keep any girls attracted in you, but at least the perfume you'll be wearing will make you feel pretty on the outside!
And there you go - the Ten Non-Juan Commandments! Print them up, post them on your refrigerator and send copies to your friends!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thus concludes this edition of "The NON-JUAN Post!" If you found this stuff to be insightful, TELL YOUR FRIENDS ABOUT IT!
Also: If you thought THESE tips were helpful, why not BUY Mr. Non-Juan's BOOK?
"From PIMP to WIMP: The Non-Juan's Guide... to Losing the Girl of Your Dreams" is a 135-page guide that teaches you EVERYTHING on how to get girls to NOT want to go out with you!!
The book gives advice on what to say on dates (so the girl will feel uncomfortable), how to dress (so a girl will flee when she first sees you), how to avoid getting close to a girl (so that she becomes inadequate about her ability to care for you and leaves YOU first), and much more!
To Read the FIRST THREE CHAPTERS of the BOOK, click here: www.nonjuan.blogspot.com
To Order the Book, go to my website, or www.ebay.com and type "NON-JUAN" into the search engine!
If you have any questions you would like to have answered, feel free to write me at nonjuan@hotmail.com. Your question will be answered on Non-Juan Mailbag Thursdays!!
That's all for now, guys!! See ya next week!
-Mr. Non-Juan
