I'm mostly referring to relations with the opposite sex here, not learning a new skill or saving up to buy something (those are easier to achieve)
I'm starting to think there is some truth to it.
I'm 45, no girlfriend/wife, never been married and no kids. I also haven't hooked up in like 11 months (Part of that can be blamed on Covid and an injury I had)
I almost feel like If I (and others on here in the same boat) desired intently for our current situation with women to change that we made it our main focus; it will have the opposite effect and become more elusive. This is because you're coming across as more desperate on an unconscious level.
If you have the attitude of "Eh whatever" and act like "If it happens, it happens", one will be automatically indifferent in attitude and more attractive.
For example, yesterday I was at the Bar with two of my friends yesterday to watch the Euro final. The bartenders were all female and all quite hot. The group to the right of us were all in their mid to late 50s and seemed to be chatting and flirting with the women the whole time.
I paid them no attention at all (the women) since I was interested in the game, getting a good buzz on and hanging with my friends.
Now, none of this mattered since the one was married anyhow and I didn't get any IOI's anyhow.
I guess my point in this situation is, if a female bartender finds you attractive and you are NOT hitting on her, your attraction level to her would rise even more since you are not doing what every other guy was doing.
Make a move if you are getting IOI's from an attractive woman, but don't make it your focus in life even if are not happy with your current female situation.
I'm starting to think there is some truth to it.
I'm 45, no girlfriend/wife, never been married and no kids. I also haven't hooked up in like 11 months (Part of that can be blamed on Covid and an injury I had)
I almost feel like If I (and others on here in the same boat) desired intently for our current situation with women to change that we made it our main focus; it will have the opposite effect and become more elusive. This is because you're coming across as more desperate on an unconscious level.
If you have the attitude of "Eh whatever" and act like "If it happens, it happens", one will be automatically indifferent in attitude and more attractive.
For example, yesterday I was at the Bar with two of my friends yesterday to watch the Euro final. The bartenders were all female and all quite hot. The group to the right of us were all in their mid to late 50s and seemed to be chatting and flirting with the women the whole time.
I paid them no attention at all (the women) since I was interested in the game, getting a good buzz on and hanging with my friends.
Now, none of this mattered since the one was married anyhow and I didn't get any IOI's anyhow.
I guess my point in this situation is, if a female bartender finds you attractive and you are NOT hitting on her, your attraction level to her would rise even more since you are not doing what every other guy was doing.
Make a move if you are getting IOI's from an attractive woman, but don't make it your focus in life even if are not happy with your current female situation.
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