The key to high school success - by someone who never found it

[Disconnect]

Do you watch those high school tv shows? The ones about teens who have everything? Who get invited to all the crazy parties, get the hottest chicks? Cant remember any off the top of my head, but I know you've seen some.
Now that I sit here and reflect upon 4 high school years, I can't help but notice how different it was from that perfect image on TV. In fact, it was as ugly by comparison as it could have been. I was a loner, a nerd, overweight, a hater. But now I know why.

From what I have observed, it seems that both social and sexual success in high school goes to the most successful athletes. Especially true when it comes to spectator sports like track, wrestling and football. In my 4 years of high school, I saw nobodies become the most popular dudes around, laying all the hot ladies. All it takes is a few touchdowns.

It's best to start out in your freshman year, when you are a nobody whether you want it to be that way or not. But if you dont wanna be like that for all four years, start going to those practices!

I learned this the hard way, not being able to do a single chin-up in grade 9 , and not doing anything to improve. How ****ing pathetic.... Just now, in my last year, I joined the wrestling team and started lifting weights, and the changes have been noticeable. I'm still not invited to the major drinking parties that all jocks go to, but at least I am now being noticed. But I know it's too late. College/uni will be the fresh start that I crave.

To tell you the truth, if I could change one thing about my high school years, it would be to get involved from the very start. Clubs and teams, the student representative council, so on. For those that hate school, why do you? Its because every day is the same. You go to school, then you go home. Next day repeats itself. No events, no nothing. But if you start getting active out there, trying to make a difference in the high school society, you will begin to love what school is meant to be.

So to guys who are just starting high school - get off your arses, and start playing sports and join clubs. Start making a difference.

If you are like me, who didnt see the light until it was too late, I just want to remind you that it's never too late to start making a difference in YOUR life. It doesn't end with high school. There will be plenty of opportunities coming your way, and you better be ready for them.

In conclusion, the high school has been the most terrible 4 years of my life, and it was nobody's fault but mine. I could have made all the difference in the world, but i was lazy, and UT2k4 seemed better than running a 400m at the time. Furthermore, I see people repeating my mistake all around me. So take my warning!

Sorry for this wild and unorganized post/rant, but if I helped at least one person, then I am more than satisfied. Because high school is the best time to enjoy yourself. It makes me very bitter, seeing people around me with tons of friends leading active lives they enjoy. I shouldnt get bitter, but sometimes its hard to help but notice the chance I missed. I know there will be no second chance quite like that for me, and I have no one to blame but myself.

- Disconnect

 

[gbpackers]

i agree... everyone should take his advice if your not like that already, because i didnt realize this until last year which was my junior year and then i finally started to shape up.

 

[LikRetsam]

Well, I'm not team captain, hell, I'm not even on a team and yet... That does not shun me from plenty of ladies.

You know, friend, you can choose any factor to blame your failure on.

 

[Carnegie]

Very inspiring, Disconnect. I have 1.5 years to go till I graduate HS and I can actually feel what you feel. I never joined clubs or sports teams and I regret that. Half the people in my grade probably dont even know my name. I will start making a difference today(well monday). I agree its no ones fault but my own and I will face the facts that I lost 4 years of my HS life. I will sharpen up and do the best I can do to be successful in HS. If only I knew back then what I know now..that would make all the difference.

 

[Disconnect]

Well, there are a lot more than you know about, lik. They are none of your business, and they shouldn't be anyways.

What I am stating is that there is no social success without being social. You gotta get off your ass and do stuff, to speak plainly.

Carneige, glad you realized what I have. Good job on your decision. Now, just stick to it. Lol, an embarassing story:

At the beginning of the year I decided to join the football team. Here I am, a guy who never watched, alone played, football, standing among the crowd of people who have over 3 of skill on me. All I could say is that it was a very humbling experience. I didnt join the team, and instead went to wrestling.

 

[Craig Reeves]

That is not true, actually.

I know plenty of guys who play football who can't get a girl to save thier lives.

Joining a club or whatever isn't going to get you the girls, either. The main reason why guys don't get girls in high school is because they do not put forth any effort to (that or they just do not know what they're doing).

I know plenty of guys who aren't in ANY club at ALL who get plenty of chicks. In fact, most of the guys that I knew who got all the chicks did not play sports.

 

[Void]

Now don't take your anger out on Ut2K4...i play that cs and sc to keep me occupied so i don't think about girls as much. Yes at this moment in my life i'm starting self improvement and thinking about how i don't have any girls that i'm interested in that are interested in me bothers me.
By the way what's your ut2k4 account man?

 

[Cloud-uk]

I like the post, but there is a flaw in your logic.

You say that being a sporty guy makes you attractive. Your evidence for this is that sporty guys seem to have more luck with the ladies.

However, all that shows is a relationsip. You will become attractive when you get off your arse and act like a man (as you said). Now, if that exprsses itself in the form of competition in sport that's great, but many guys who act in the right way spend their time doing other stuff.

But still, I like your advice none the less.

 

[InsidiousNstinct]

Don't use angles.....PERIOD. Also if you just want to join a team to lay some bimbo (hehehe) then theres something wrong. Playing a sport is about kicking someone elses butt and feeling victory. Oh yeah...sportsmenship fits in there somewhere...

I do give you some credit as you are telling others to get out there and be more social but I feel as though your saying it for the wrong reasons?

 

[Disconnect]

I was just basing my point on what I have observed in the 4 years. Sure, there are guys who don't play any sports, and get all the ladies. For example, the senior king (or pin or whatever). He doesnt do any sports and is quite out of shape, but he is a natural DJ, and everyone in the school knows him, since he talks at all the pep rallies and school assemblies.

Sports is just one of the ways to get attention.

Let me tell you my take on Teams vs Clubs. In my honest opinion, a Team is better for a testosteronized male than a club would be. Art CLUB, geek CLUB, chess CLUB... as opposed to the Wrestling TEAM, Football TEAM, track TEAM. Testosterone rises during competition, when you feel something is at stake. And it was said countless times that it is testosterone that makes one a man. In a club however, there is no such competition.

Also, when you are on a team, you all have a common 'enemy', so to speak: the other schools, the opposing team. You are all striving to defeat that enemy, and it brings you closer with your teammates. That's what s so great about team sports.

I am not trying to make any generalizations, just talking about what I ve seen in my years of high school. I am sure I haven't seen everything. You can get a lot of ladies and make lots of friends by befriending the popular crowd, but it seems easier to just become that crowd. Also, it IS true that some guys on the football team could not get the ladies even if their lives depended on it. But the team gives you ACCESS to them. Getting them is what THIS site is about. Im talking about the sl*t brigade that gets passed around from team to team, the ones who always hang around jock types. Much harder to get them if you're not an athlete, and they are usually the hottest chicks in the school.

As a final word, sports are not the means to only meet the girls. There are way more benefits. How bout your health? Staying in shape should be a personal priority. Besides, everyone needs to have some kind of a life.

 

[Dimebag_Darrell]

**** that sh*t man. Play football because you're gonna f*cking win and HIT SOMEONE, and not for some stupid bimbo wh*re.

Same goes with playing music or anything else...with hobbies.

Do what you f*cking like and be passionate about for it is what makes you more attractive because it gives you worth in a girl's eyes.

Don't be so sacreligious to the great amercian sport of tackle football.

 

[On_the_Top]

I played football and wrestled in highschool cause I wanted to. I knew guys that where into sports that got no women, I knew that wren't that got ladies. Now I do agree that playing sports does help boost your confidence level way up and its gets you into good shape, but don't do it cause you think it will get you laid. If you play a sport for all the wrong reasons then your just gonna wind up hating any physical activity and or your just gonna quit after a few hard practices.

 

[Disconnect]

What I mean is playins sports gives you access to ladies. It gets you noticed. "Congratulations to name for making 6 touchdowns against 'team'!" they announce on the intercom during daily student notices. The entire freaking school hears your name!

I meant wrong. I saw the flaw in my reasoning. I joined wrestling, Xcountry, Track, and so on just to get the chicks. Never did it for myself. Now I realized I was wrong. I ll begin shifting my perspective as of now.

Now that I think about it, why am I wrestling? I find that lately I don't particularly enjoy it (rolling around with another sweaty guy on the floor, thats how I see it). But I kept doing it because I thought I would get recognition, to get the chicks. I AM doing it for the wrong reasons.

Guys, thanx for point it out to me!

 

[Speed Demon]

i strongly agree with this thread.

 

[New Direction]

You just need to get your face out there. You don't need to play a sport, just get a group of people together and go watch a game or go to a school event. Then you'll meet more people who will in turn help you meet others. That is, if you are willing to work at it also.

 

[bogman2121]

it's not just because the guys score a few td's or lay a few people out. guys in sports seem to get more girls because, for the most part, the good players know they're good and have confidence which carries over into their social life and chicks dig confidence. this simple reason is why confidence is stressed as so important on this site. if you read any of the stories about how guys lives have changed its because they became more confident. so GET CONFIDENT about yourself and become the best you can.

 

[idiot_boyfriend]

Disconnect,

Awesome post, man.

I went through the same thing. I decided to transform myself last year, but got off to a slow start....I was lacking something. In the last few months, I realized I lacked confidence and was overly insecure. I'm trying to change that as we speak, but for High School, I think I might be too late.

 

[Fenderules]

the popular ppl at my school had really nothing to do with athletics. I mean our football team sucked ass. I mean a lot of the pop ppl were on sports teams but that was not why they were pop.

this is why:

They were confident, alway fun to be around, hardly in a bad mood, made friends with everyone

 

[young_gun]

I agree with this thread at a certain level.

Yes, it is important to put yourself in a position to meet girls, such as playing sports. Now, someone who plays football or basketball has an advantage over someone who doesn't in that people will recognize them. But this doesn't mean that you have to join a sports team, or any club for that matter, to get some recognition at school. I know a few guys that play football that no one has ever heard of. I know guys that play basketball that everyone knows about, but have big problems when it comes down to attracting ladies. If you really think about it, just about every opportunity you have is an opportunity to boost your social status.

Some of the coolest guys I know - have the most friends, usually around the most decent-looking broads - aren't involved in any types of activity at all. Sure, they keep themselves in shape and have jobs, but the reason they are popular at school is because of who they are. Their conversational skills are top notch, they can have fun in whatever situation they are put in, and they have a wicked sense of humor. I mean, these guys are damn funny. I personally am pretty jealous of guys who are naturally good at these things, but I believe that if I really apply myself, I can be at their level. I think this is what it takes to have the success you want to have.

 

[TonyTheTigerOI]

I am the exception, sadly enough.

I play on the state team for soccer (NYSWest). I am in great shape (3.89sec 40 meter). I am good looking. Nobody talks to me or invites me anywhere.

As important as it is to get involved - you have to be careful not to outshine everyone around you. When I transfered to my current school girls would approach me in groups of 3 and invite me to dances and parties all over the area. I was having too much fun acting older than I was, going to bars and dating college girls, and I turned their offers down.

And I regret it. Because I suffered for 8 hours a day in a school where everyone was afraid and jealous of me. Im better looking than the hottest girls in school - but they dont even look at me.

As important as clubs and activities are... make sure and APPRECIATE the fame and popularity you recieve... or it will fade fast.