The Good And The Bad Since Coming To Sosuave

[kidkris2007]

I've been visiting this site since 2004 and I've had some success but not as much as I would like. There are certain things I've taken away from sosuave.

Good:

I act like a man and take responsibility for myself.
I never quit anything I start
I'm so much more physically healthy
I know how to approach women
I view everything as a learning experience
I can deal with **** tests from women easier, I don't take it personal
I strive to improve

Bad:
I haven't been able to feel "love" or even butterflies for any women since taking on this mindest (The worst one, I miss this)
I don't feel as creative as I used to (if ideas interfere with being a DJ I dismiss them)
I feel the need to always be "on"
I compare myself to being an ideal DJ and get frustrated about my progress
I still have trouble controlling my emotions

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Good:

I act like a man and take responsibility for myself.
I never quit anything I start
I'm so much more physically healthy
I know how to approach women
I view everything as a learning experience
I can deal with sh!t tests from women easier, I don't take it personal
I strive to improve
I haven't been able to feel "love" (i.e. ONEitis) or even butterflies for any women since taking on this mindest
I don't feel as creative as I used to (if ideas interfere with being a DJ I dismiss them, such as all the AFC behaviors I used to think might be effective in getting me laid with the girl I obsessed over)
I feel the need to always be "on"
I compare myself to being an ideal DJ and get frustrated about my progress
I still have trouble controlling my emotions (because I KNOW BETTER now)

 

[Sadao]

The pro's outweigh the con's by far, but my major cons are not being able to open up to that special someone and really express my emotions, and the feeling of always being "on" and not being able to just relax for the most part.

 

[Dark Chivalry]

Bro, DJ is a skill, not the meaning of life and the be all and end all. Putting it above everything else can make you a slave to DJ'ing.


I enjoy getting creative and the same passion I unleash on a woman, I unleash on my writing or pictures, so I can see there is a connection between those problems.

Once you have learned how to be in control, you can lose control here and there and let the butterflies take over for a bit.
Onitis is falling in love with a random woman just because she is pretty and latching onto her even though she may be a nutjob, of course this must be avoided. But being in love with a woman with whom you share rare interests and who fits you like a glove, complements you is not onitis.

It's good to have power over women and control yourself so desirable women can be attracted to you. But if she is powerless and you are in complete control, all you have is a pet. A real woman can submit to you without being powerless, and she has boundaries.

It's nice to make a girl spread em because you are a PUA and can flip her switches, but its even nicer when a girl gets aroused by DJ skill, but has self control enough not to open those thighs for every man with game. Who gets to know you and wants you rather than any other PUA, because of your unique personality and then gives in to you to have some mind blowing sex together.

My father said being with a woman, the right one, is like riding a bicycle: You are always slightly off balance, but there is harmony and you never go too far off balance, so you don't fall. Try to sit straight and you fall, accept the constant change and enjoy the ride. If you both have seduction skills and boundaries you never grow into too much of an AFC nor turn into too much of a jerk or b!tch. Then you can each supplicate a little bit, without fearing the other takes advantage of you or you becoming a doormat.

 

[Heart Break Kid]

Topic creator, you say you know how to approach woman, but do you do it? Four out of five cons you mentioned have a large correlation with this and the fifth; emotions could easily be attributed to an effect of this problem. Sosuave is amazing but it should be second to your time in the field.

 

[Docs]

Good:
- A ten-fold boost in confidence with women
- Justly so, a ten-fold boost in the number of interactions
- Fine tuned my flirting.
- I have found the balls.
- I am not afraid to kick a disrespecter out of my car.
- I dress good.
- I run the show

Cons:
- I'm a little bit of a cheap slut. If I like it, I'll try to fvck/kiss it.
- I've attracted a few nut cases (B-52 anyone?)
- I'm a solo roller...nobody here understands game.
- I'm running multiple plates, and it's fvcking up the other plates.

 

[Bonhomme]

I haven't been able to feel "love" or even butterflies for any women since taking on this mindest (The worst one, I miss this)
I don't feel as creative as I used to (if ideas interfere with being a DJ I dismiss them)

I hear you. You've lost your tendency to be romantic. I often feel the same way, that I've gotten too indifferent, and that some gals have lost heart because I didn't put forth enough emotional effort.

Yet I'm convinced that a gal has to earn romance. Haven't properly sorted out how to reconcile romance with a proper level of indifference to outcome.

 

[navyseal2101]

The only negative I have is I came here to learn how to get a specific girl and now I can't feel the same way I did around her. It's like theres no point in picking up chicks b/c I dont get and kind of rush anymore now that I can. May go AFC again, at least i'll have feelings for women again.

 

[kidkris2007]

I guess part of my problem is that after reading article after article about "forget women, do what you love" etc. I haven't been able to find anything in life that moves me day in and day out. It's hard for me to be consistantly wanting to do something that that feels aweful. It's like, without women I have nothing to fall back on which is why I come her trying fine tune my 'game' all the time. Cus there's little else I'm passionate about.

I thought it was guitar but I was wrong. I thought it was making money, but I'm not that interested in being rich. I enjoy bodybuilding and sports as a hobby but I'm not 'in love' with them. I dunno, hopefully I'll find something I can loose myself in because right now I don't have that.

P.S - Why is this moved to Anything Else?

 

[kidkris2007]

I still have trouble controlling my emotions (because I KNOW BETTER now)

Can you explain this Rollo?