The dreaded third wheel

[Bama Ryan]

I took myself out of the game for a while. Several nasty breakups, my mom passed away, and I had a serious personal medical situation which I have overcome. Dating wasn't on the front burner.

I think this may be a success story -- small first step but first step nonetheless. I've known this girl for several years. I actuallly met her through her ex-boyfriend which she was with up until this past March. I've always had a thing for her but I kept my distance in that regard.

But lately there's been a spark in our conversations. Flirty and fun. This has been after her breakup by the way. She has dropping big hints about wanting to take it to another level. I'll be honest but i don't know what i've done but I've ignited her feminity somehow. i flipped a switch and don't know how I really did it.

I asked her to a play this past weekend. She calls me a couple days ebfore the play and says that her best friends wanted to come along. Don't get me wrong her friend loves me and i love her (she's married FWIW). I felt comfortable, confident, funny, and she was just taken by me. But that's not the punchline.

It was an audience-participation play. not eveyrone was brought up on stage but i was, twice. I was even asked to be part of the cast bow. I look out at Carmen (the 3rd wheel) and Ashley (my target) on my 2nd time up on stage. Carmen's cheering like crazy. Ashley's cheering too, but there's a look on her face thats hard to explain., It was hungry. It was inviting. i saw it as the moment when she stopped seeing me as only a friend if you know what I mean.


We left apart and she rode with Carmen. I sent her a txt message that night and called her on Monday. I saw her at the gym Monday evening and the spark was just off the charts. no plans for this weekend yet.

I think a lot of her. She thinks a lot of me. I just hope I don't screw it up! Thoughts, concerns, am I crazy? How do I call out Ashley on this 3rd wheel concept without seeming to eager and maybe scaring her away because she's a live one!

 

[ARrocket]

Congrats on getting things back in order!

Now then, onto the girl. It seems like you're in control of the situation for the most part. Going to see a play is a good experience, but it's not really something that works in your favor as far as seduction goes. It's a fun social experience, so it's understandable why her friend wanted to join in.

Even if the friend hadn't joined it, there's not much room for escalating at this play. But of course you could have left with her at the end of the night. So in this particular situation it could have worked, but in general, not a good first date IMO.

Next time you get together with this girl, be sure to isolate her. Take her out for drinks somewhere near your place, or maybe even just suggest she comes over to watch a movie. Of course you'll have a bottle of wine on hand, and you'll be ready to kick things up a notch

Last warning, maybe the most important of all: You seem to be coming down with a bad case of one-itis for this woman. Careful. Don't get too emotionally invested just yet. Spin some other plates for awhile too, it will keep yourself in check. The less time you spend thinking about this woman, the less likely you'll fail.

Good luck.

 

[Lexington]

As Rocket said, be careful, don't fall for this broad too early. She's got a long way to go yet (as do all girls at this stage of the game).

You'd better call soon because it's Thursday and you don't want her weekend plans to fill up. Ask your target out on a date. Make sure it's a more intimate, one on one situation. If she brings the third wheel out again, then I'm afraid it's probably time call it quits on this broad. If she's really interested, she's not going to bring a 3rd wheel again.

Going by your comments, it does seem like she is into you. But remember, she knows you through her ex-boyfriend and there is a chance that she doesn't see you "that way." Your next date should be a good gauge of her feelings.