The Case FOR Marriage

[Deep Dish]

Awhile back there was one big thread arguing against marriage and it's my intention to illuminate the positive.


People who are married generally are happier and live longer than those who are single.

You can't stay single forever. Eventually you will settle down with a woman, and if the relationship can go the distance, the question becomes "Why NOT." Because you're afraid of risks of infidelity and an assortment of other marital dysfunctions? If so you must not have much belief in yourself or the woman. It's as if you guys are expecting the relationships to fail. You guys claim it's so hard finding high quality women, to which I tend to agree, but let's follow that through; say you found a high quality woman, what then? You'd be an idiot to apply all those reasons not to get involved with non-high quality women, to your high quality woman. This is common sense.

You say you don't want a woman to hinder you from your dreams. Who ever said you can't do both? There are inherently two types of women: those whom SUBSTRACT from your life, those whom ADD to your life. Surely those high quality women, if so they are high quality, will fall under category of adding to your life. I see and know people in real life whom this whole paragraph isn't theory to them, it's reality, even after decades. Personally, I dream of seeing the world, and I don't see how it can't be done with a right woman.

Divorced men warn us: "Never get married. It's a HUGE mistake. A huge SCAM." Take a step backward. Here they failed and now don't want you to possibly succeed; they will view it as helping prevent a brother from taking a misstep, but ultimately the end result is preventing you from succeeding where they failed. Bear in mind most people are stupid, fairly intelligent but hating to utilize their brains, and thereby no question why you should follow your own way if you do it smart. Focus on yourself, not failures of everyone else. Sure there are plenty of guys who become whipped, yet there are plenty guys who don't. There are slutty housewives, same with narcissism, golddiggas, anger management problems, and what not; yet there also are very caring and giving women. You decide your fate.

The Geography of Women

Between the ages of 15 - 18 a woman is like China or Iran. Developing at a sizzling rate with a lot of potential but as yet still not free or open.

Between the ages of 18-21 a woman is like Africa or Australia. She is half discovered, half wild and naturally beautiful.

Between the ages of 21 - 30 a woman is like America or Japan. Completely discovered, very well developed and open to trade especially with countries with cash or cars.

Between the ages of 30 - 35, she is like India or Spain. Very hot, relaxed and convinced of it's own beauty.

Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman like France or Argentina. She may have been half destroyed during the war but can still be a warm and desirable place to visit.

Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Yugoslavia or Iraq. She lost the war and is haunted by past mistakes. Massive reconstruction is now necessary.

Between the ages of 50 - 60 she is like Russia or Canada. Very wide, quiet and the borders are practically unpatrolled but the frigid climate keeps people away.

Between the ages of 60 - 70 a woman is like England or Mongolia. A glorious and all conquering past but alas no future.

After 70, they become Afghanistan or Pakistan. Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.

My point in bringing up this joke is you can find a high quality woman in her youth and settle down into a long-lasting healthy relationship, marriage, before the time when available women you meet are guaranteed to have gone through the 'wars' and suffer baggage. If you wait too long, good luck, you'll be needing it. Even though I've been a loner all my life, it's not a life I will continue.

Marriage CAN work. Be the right man. Find the right woman. Take the right mindset. Aspire high and work hard.

 

[( . )( . )]

why didnt you just bump the other thread with this post?,anyways the arguments not to marry far outnumber those to get married, and what are the stats now on divorce rate? some ludicrously high number.
if i "love" a chick and i use the term loosely and i feel she loves me, why in blue blazers do we need a piece of paper from the government to tell us ?

lets look at it a different way, some men need marriage to prove their worth some dont.

Marriage CAN work.

yeah it can but todays times usually doesnt, and seems outdated and frankly doesnt hold any weight anymore with couples, except for a huge financial burden.

Be the right man.

already am and i would hope you dont need marriage to confirm this.

Find the right woman.

i always find the right women, but sheesh i dont want to marry them.

If you wait too long, good luck, you'll be needing it.

you say this as if its a sense of urgency to marry, and there is an importance to marry.

 

[rbd]

I agree with a lot of what Deep Dish has to say. Marriage does tend to get a lot of crap on this forum due to the past experience of posters, heresay or plain old conjecture. However, I still think there is a lot of merit left in the concept, if, like Deep Dish noted, you are the right man and find the right woman.

Personally, I love being single, but I would also, DOWN THE ROAD want to 'settle down' with a woman who is 'mature in the right ways' and have some kids. I don't want to be single the rest of my life. I'm sure many people here feel the same way.

So many marriages go wrong for every reason under the sun. The concept of marriage has been reduced down to drive-thru parlors and 5 minute sessions, so it makes sense that it's not taken as seriously these days. Moreover, many people I've talked to in college are married or are getting married. These are people that are like 19-22 with sex drives to rival their youth. WHAT THE HELL? Maybe reasons like these are why many marriages don't work out. However, the ones that go right hardly ever get mention or attention. I believe that as a lot of us get older, our focus doesn't become "get chicks" any more. This is not to mean that we stop being a DJ, as I think being a Don Juan is more about a state of mind than anything else. It simply means that our priorities change. And for some of us here, scoring with a crapload of chicks was never one of our priorities. Different strokes for different folks.

...then there are some who take that last sentence literally and never get out with the ladies. Oh well.

 

[diplomatic_lies]

When you're 70, you're not going to be hitting on any hot 20s chicks.

Although Anna Nicole Smith did marry a 90-year-old guy....but he died 6 months after and she's got her paws on his fortune.

 

[ultrashogun]

Of course many reasons speak against marriage. But the thing is, even if you now think that marriage sucks when your around 50 - 70 years old your not gonna get much ***** anymore. And what I think really must suck is spending the dusk of your life bye yourself.

But dont get me wrong, Im actually very much in favor of marriing and not only so not to be lonesome at age.

 

[jwhite17]

I want to get married some day, but I would tell my wife to sign a prenup or else it wouldn't happen. I don't want to end up like my father's friend paying 50,000 dollars a year and child support(until his 10yr old son turns 18) to his ex-wife until 65(he's 51 right now).

Also, I want to be financially secure and ready to get married. I think people get married way too young and pop out baby after baby when they can't afford it, don't these people know babies cost a lot???

 

[princelydeeds]

The minute you sign that piece of paper and put on the ring you give up at least %50 of your fortune and thats if your lucky. Don't let a prenup fool you cause shes entitled to at least half of what you make while married regardless of how the prenup is structured. Rich poor black white, if your a man your gonna get screwed.

If you have kids its even worse. Don't think for a minute you can get custody of the kids cause as long as shes walking and halfway healthy shes gonna get custody. You get the right to pay half of your net income. The right to go back and live with your momma. The right to have your kids turned against you by the person you send a pay check every month. Lose your job? so what pay her or go to jail. Those are your rights. Any questions?

The courts are screwing men and we are sitting by and letting them create more laws to screw men. I say no to marriage.

 

[STR8UP]

I would get married if the situation were right. I could see myself settling down by the time I hit my mid 30's but I'm not in any hurry.

It's a scary thing though...I know a multi-millionaire whose wife just decided to leave him. She is gonna take him to the cleaners. To make matters worse she is keeping him from seeing his kids.

You can take the woman out of the trailer park but you can't take the trailer park out of the woman.

 

[Industry]

If you're so worried about a girl taking your fortune (ha!) then you probably shouldn't marry her in the first place. Remember, it is for life (or so they tell you) so you gotta think about it that way. I personally believe they make it too easy to get a divorce in this country. "Irreconsilable Differances" usually equates to her wanting to **** her boss and not give up her alimony due to "adultery".

I have been dating a beautiful girl (you would rate her at about a 8.5-9 on your scale) for about 2 1/2 years now and we haven't talked seriously about it but it is still open as discussion when the right time comes.

REMEMBER: Marry a sugar momma and take her to the cleaners for a change. Older rich women love young guys.

 

[diplomatic_lies]

Just marry a chick with a career. She might be more aggressive but at least she makes money too.