Thanking your enemies

[Love Doctor Rx]

Hey guys. I dont know if I am really different, or others are like this too: every negative interaction since childhood - I remember, and many of them bother me to this day. It is hard for me to "forget" being thought of as below someone, the pain of being LJBF'd, told that I'm unattractive, etc. Many of these happened in high school, but mostly the first couple of years of college.

I have changed a lot since then, and yesterday after acing my exam (one of the hardest ones in pharmacy school) I drank alot, and again remembered alot or the negativity. At the same time, I knew that without those people, I would not have the drive and motivation to get better social skills, confrontation skills, confidence, better body, better looks, better game, etc etc.

I literally messaged on facebook some of those people, saying thank you for treating me like ****, and trying to put me down. I would not be where I am without you.

This was a good this to do, and probably a big weight off my shoulders. Anyone did anything similar?

 

[Mike32ct]

I'm not at a level where I "thank" them, but I definitely forgive them. I'm also glad they gave me that wakeup call when I was very naive.

 

[joverby]

That's great that you are able to do that. But if people "treated me like sh1t and put me down." I think I would just chalk it up as the personal "lesson" you took from it and not bother giving them any sort of satisfaction or reward them for their bad behavior.

I tend to just forget about people like that. Or in the case of one guy(Ex-Boss / Friend) who would always just push people buttons and be a general ass.(Was alsoa narcissistic ladies man).

When I wasn't working with him any more, I removed him from facebook / stopped talking etc. He was just an a$$. I saw him a month or so ago at a bar with a buddy. He walked up and was immediately an a$$hole trying to make fun of me, last I talked to him I told him unless he could show some respect, don't bother talking.

So he makes a comment about that. I just say something back to the effect of really? That's the first thing you're going to say to me etc...So pretty much I tell him to piss off, he comes back a couple minutes later and sincerley apologizes to me and says he can be an a$$hole to people.

It felt good. The old, more AFC me, wouldn't of stood my ground. I didn't demand respect. But I wasn't going to tolerate disrespect, so he knew what he had to do to befriend me.