Texting/Tinder Game: Keeping the iron hot Vs. Being laid back

gravityeyelids

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So i was talking to this girl on tinder months ago, and i randomly sent out a ";)" message last week and she replied with something like "hey baby! where've you been?" (We had been roleplaying that we were gonna be getting married, planning our honeymoon, blah blah...)

So we were talking a lot that day/night and the next day. We were flirting a lot and i was actually surprised when she said "i think we should take this relationship to the next level. Like...you know, maybe exchanging phone numbers?" So we switched to texting and keep flirting. We're talking a lot....probably close to 50 or 100 messages, her IL is very high and she was responding quickly...Usually i dont message that much, but i've found it can be a good idea with tinder so they feel more secure.

I hinted that it sucks living at home at my parents' house over the summer. she is as well, so I was like fvckkkk i want a girl that lives on her own so i can bang easier. But she said "I get along super well with my parents so its not too bad. Plus im in the basement so i have a whole area they dont come down to. So i do all the usual...sneak boys in etc. Haha ;)"

We joked around about sneaking me in and making sure she keeps her hands off me. I was sick of all the talking so at this point i go: "But for real, we're hanging out sometime soon. When are you free?"

She replies: "I'm free often...mon and wed i only have class until 3 and i usually only work mornings. Plus my parents are out of town next week, we can play house. You're the dad, i'm the mom, you know etc.etc."

Boom. We made plans for tuesday because thats when her parents leave...so my question is this: Is it better to just lay back until tuesday and not hit her up until then? Honestly i'm getting sick of all this texting. Or should i "keep the iron hot" by texting her now and then until tuesday? She's very responsive and whenever i get sexual over text, she plays along well. We've exchanged sexy snaps as well...nothing nude, just like bra and panties or whatever.

Hit her up tomorrow (monday) and confirm plans? Or just wait until that day? I'm reluctant to wait til the last minute, because in the past, i waited too long and i've had girls say "well i didnt hear from you, so i figured you didnt still wanna meet up"
 

goldengoose

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If she is hot for you, not texting her isn't going to change her mind, she still will want you to come over. Is she initiating anything with the texts or just replying to yours? Chicks who like you will initiate and if she wants to bang she will send you something. All the playing needs to end and the action needs to begin.
 

gravityeyelids

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goldengoose said:
If she is hot for you, not texting her isn't going to change her mind, she still will want you to come over. Is she initiating anything with the texts or just replying to yours? Chicks who like you will initiate and if she wants to bang she will send you something. All the playing needs to end and the action needs to begin.
I've been doing the initiating recently, but i've held off the last few days and she hasnt initiated anything. But every time i've initiated shes been extremely responsive, texting me back usually within minutes and sometimes sending a couple texts in a row.

I mean we have tentative plans for tomorrow...Should i hit her up in the morning with something playful and flirty to lock down what time or whatever? What's something good to send her? I'm usually solid with text game but i'm feeling lazy and uninspired at the moment haha
 

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goldengoose

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gravityeyelids said:
I've been doing the initiating recently, but i've held off the last few days and she hasnt initiated anything. But every time i've initiated shes been extremely responsive, texting me back usually within minutes and sometimes sending a couple texts in a row.

I mean we have tentative plans for tomorrow...Should i hit her up in the morning with something playful and flirty to lock down what time or whatever? What's something good to send her? I'm usually solid with text game but i'm feeling lazy and uninspired at the moment haha

With texting, you don't want to be the guy always sending her the texts. You want her to be sending you texts to where you are responding to her. If she was initiating still, then I would say go ahead, but doing too much can hurt you. You've done enough flirty stuff on the phone to where you can meet at her place for the bang. I would just see if she is legit, confirm the time for tomorrow, flirt in person, then bang.
 

El Payaso

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I'd advice you to lay back so you don't trigger ASD from her or fall into a virtual sh!t test. Just wait for the day.
 

gravityeyelids

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El Payaso said:
I'd advice you to lay back so you don't trigger ASD from her or fall into a virtual sh!t test. Just wait for the day.
Too late, texted her last night after not hitting her up for a good 4 days or so.
i didnt put the timing of the texts because im too lazy, but i typically try to wait at least at long as she took to get back to me. Her responses are typically quick. Thankfully, they're not instantaneous...she usually waits a good 3-7 minutes for each one, which is good, because the crazies are usually the ones that text you back RIGHT AWAY

I'm actually glad she started to finally give me mild sh!t tests and stuff...because honestly it was getting too easy and every time it's too easy....they're like unattractive in person or something. Luckily i;m not too bad at fending off these tests and such

Me: when are you free tomorrow?
Her: All day!
Me: Well i checked with my secretary and i should be able to fit you in my schedule around 3.
Her: Haha oooh lucky me. Anything fun planned for us?
Me: you're the host! That's your job. I expect fine wines and cheeses and a bubble bath.
Her: How about the dollaaa menu?
Me: Is that all i'm worth to you Marisa?
Her: No baby i would take you to [fancy restaurant downtown]
Me: Rawr
Her: give me a massage though?
Me: Only if we get to take turns on each other :p
Her: Oh you got it! I love giving a good massage just as much as i love recieving one. Only if you let me touch your arms however
Me: I might be able to arrange that. You should probably text me your address at some point.
Her: Good god that's exciting. And whys that so you can kidnap me?
Me: Hey missy it's your home. For all i know you could have the russian mob waiting to jump me.
Her: Darling how'd you know? My window is ground level. Be careful when you sneak in they'll be waiting.
Me: Then its a good thing i'm a triple black belt in Jiu Jitsu ;P
Her: Haha make it past them and you'll be my knight in shining armor
Me: Nah, that sounds like far too much work
Her: are you trying to play hard to get with me? It will never work baby!
Me: You make it sound as if you're not the one chasing me :p
Her: Excuse me I do not want to be the cat while you are the mouse
Her: Or maybe I do

[NEXT MORNING (Today)]

Me: That could be interesting
Her: Haha but we're interesting enough people :kiss:
[I didnt respond, it was getting closer to 3]
Her: [Sends a picture of Fireball whisky] Haha we could sip on fireball all day today?
Me: I have some stuff i've got to do, But i might just take you up on that after
Her: Haha we can get drunk into the night :kissyface:
Me:I'll hit you up when im done with every thing
Her: Okay :kiss:
[2hours later]
Me: I'm all set
Her: Haha okay Whats the plan stan?
Me: I'm thinking chilling with some fireball at your place. I've gotta get outta her before my mom gives me more chores to do
Her: Haha okay. I'll give you my address as long as you promise me you aren't an awkward person and I wont regret it :kiss:
Me: Wait, how can I be sure you're not a serial killer?
Her: You can't :knife:
Me: I guess i'll have to take my chances ;)

I'll keep you fellas posted
 

j.619

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Sweet update. Good text game for the lead-up. Good luck, brothaaaa
 

You essentially upped your VALUE in her eyes by showing her that, if she wants you, she has to at times do things that you like to do. You are SOMETHING after all. You are NOT FREE. If she wants to hang with you, it's going to cost her something — time, effort, money.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

gravityeyelids

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UPDATE - Lay Report (kinda lame)

So she texted me on the way to call her when i was a few minutes out to make sure i'm not a psycho. As i would later find out, her only previous encounter on tinder was with this super awkward guy who invited her over and she spent the whole time trying to leave. So if i sounded awkward on the phone, she was fully intent on locking the doors and pretending she wasnt home. Luckily i wasnt awkward.

Get there and say hello, give her a hug. She seemed happy that I was cute, but still kind of standoffish, so i figured the best play for this was to play it nice and friendly despite the sexual texting we had done. We start talking and I keep it casual because i feel like she woulda gotten freaked out if I had escalated kino and sensual talking too fast. After all, she was home alone out in the boonies and her parents were gone the whole week. So we get talking and shes being very social and friendly and responsive, we fluff talk for a good 20-30 minutes so she's comfortable with me. I throw in a bit of mild teasing, but for the moment keep my distance and sit across the kitchen table with her nice and polite. She's watching Gossip Girls and i tease her about the show. I suggest we go and watch it in the living room, so we park on the couch.

She's sitting on the same 3-seat couch, but a good foot or two away. She seems standoffish yet intriqued. I should mention at this point that I was praying to God that she was cute on the way over, cause it was like a half hour drive...She answers the door and she's a bit thicker than i had thought but still has a cute face and nice D-cups. I see her in a different light when we're messing with her dogs and under that light she looks bigger and less attractive. There's a moment when i'm like "man, i need to have higher standards...this is gonna be one of those nights where i'm not really attracted to the girl, but i'm gonna bang her anyway..."

So back to the couch, we're sitting there talking at pretty soon i just put my legs over hers and sit back while still talking. Kind of sudden and she makes a comment like "well, okay then...", but i ignore it and keep plowing. She starts to open up verbally more but her body language is still closed up. I think this is one of those situations where she's obviously attracted to me (I mean who wouldn't be? As a side note...i'm coming to realize i may have narcissistic tendencies...) yet she's shy and/or nervous. So what do I do? Good ole social lubricant. I suggest we break into that bottle of Fireball. Have a few drinks and i feel much more comfortable, and i'm taking more risks with the conversation. The turning point i believe is when i started to ask her about how her other Tinder experiences were, and how she felt about meeting up with me. We start talking about what we find attractive in the opposite sex...then progress to awkward sexual experiences, then to what we enjoy in bed. I do the good ole pull-her-chin-towards me and KISS CLOSE. From there the doors are opened.

After a bit, we're loosened up, and i get us to lay down and spoon. I start to make out harder and bite her neck and sh!t and start reaching up her skirt and she gives me the I'M ON MY PERIOD LINE! FUARRKKKKKK. Well I can still touch her cl!t and get a *******, right? RIGHT. When we're talking about sex, she mentions that every time she has sex it hurts a lot for her to the point where she's never really enjoyed it...also mentions this is probably partially because she has sex very sporadically, and it's been a while.

She says she's hot and asks me if i think it's hot up here. Of course i agree and we move to the basement couch which is bigger and cooler. Blah, blah, keep escalating, start playing with her cl!t. One thing that pisses me off...girls that aren't sexual enough. I'm turning her on and shes not even touching me, either my body or my ****. I have to guide her hand there, and even then she doesnt...She's also kind of self concious about her tampon. I'm slightly irritated at this point, but dont show it, for a few reasons: she's decent looking but not hot..at least not hot enough to turn me on much. Also, she's on her period, and is being kind of boring. Whatever...i decide to keep drinking her liquor until she looks good.

I get her turned on to the point where i can tell she's making clear signals she wants to move to her room. So i lead her there. We start making out again and i'm touching her and FINALLY she starts playing with my wang. I ask her to go down on me. GENTLEMEN. LISTEN UP. If a girl hasn't started sucking you off by the time you want to... i find it's never a bad idea to say to her "Can you go down on me?" It's forward, direct and it doesn't sound sleazy like "Give me a blowj0b" or "suck my d!ck". This almost always works. It takes a bit of prodding, but finally she does. Head skills - about average, maybe a bit above. However, not up to thick girl standards.

We fool around a bit more, and she's getting wet even with the tampon. I even tell her this and we basically start talking about having sex. I wouldnt normally do this...but considering she had a tampon in, and i knew she'd probably be down, i kind of had to. But this kind of pissed me offf....we're sitting there for like 10 minutes...she's sucking me off most of the time...but we're having like logical discussion about whether or not she should take her tampon out. Note that i was trying to keep it non-rational and seductive...but she kept being annoying and like hemming and hawing about whether or not to. I basically just told her to go take it out several times and she finally did. But i was getting impatient because it's not like i can sit there and be hard as a rock for like 20 minutes just waiting for her to decide whether or not to fvck me. I mean i need a little bit for foreplay and sexual tension too, ya know?? esp if she's not hot. So she goes to take it out, and we eventually start going at it.

THANKFULLY, she felt really good because she was probably the tightest girl i've been in. The downside? She was thicker and not flexible so her hips literally wouldnt open wide enough in missionary to let me in her. But it felt surprisingly good and we got it on.

She was okay...but she lives with her parents and while she was tight as fvckk....probably not going to hit her up again
 

El Payaso

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Your text conversation sounds very natural and unforced. You got her to fvck you without even spending a single dollar (assuming she bought the drink) so still a good job. Something I need to work on.
 

gravityeyelids

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El Payaso said:
Your text conversation sounds very natural and unforced. You got her to fvck you without even spending a single dollar (assuming she bought the drink) so still a good job. Something I need to work on.
Thanks my man. A while back you helped me work on my tinder game, so if you ever need any opinions on stuff or someone to bounce ideas off of, dont hesitate to ask.

As a side note...I'm getting pretty sick of tinder. So much damn work for just meeting up with only a few girls. Flake rate is so high. And not to mention, that i'm getting sick of sub par chicks. I actually feel bad banging a chick if i'm not really into her. I'm tight on my game with average chicks...but i need to step it up to the big leagues and start gaming dime-pieces and hotties. Problem is it's like 10x easier to go after the 7's than it is to go after the 9's and 10's. I could spend weeks and months trying to game 9/10's and get nothing, whereas i could probably go game 7's and get laid every few weeks.. Maybe my standards are too high and what other people say is a 9 is actually a 7 on my scale...not to sound conceited. But i've tried not being picky and just trying to get laid and my heart isnt into it. The sex feels okay but i'm not all that into it. Just a reflection.
 

Heraclius

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gravityeyelids said:
Thanks my man. A while back you helped me work on my tinder game, so if you ever need any opinions on stuff or someone to bounce ideas off of, dont hesitate to ask.

As a side note...I'm getting pretty sick of tinder. So much damn work for just meeting up with only a few girls. Flake rate is so high. And not to mention, that i'm getting sick of sub par chicks. I actually feel bad banging a chick if i'm not really into her. I'm tight on my game with average chicks...but i need to step it up to the big leagues and start gaming dime-pieces and hotties. Problem is it's like 10x easier to go after the 7's than it is to go after the 9's and 10's. I could spend weeks and months trying to game 9/10's and get nothing, whereas i could probably go game 7's and get laid every few weeks.. Maybe my standards are too high and what other people say is a 9 is actually a 7 on my scale...not to sound conceited. But i've tried not being picky and just trying to get laid and my heart isnt into it. The sex feels okay but i'm not all that into it. Just a reflection.
Even still, I'm pretty impressed with your Tinder experience so far.

I'm a pretty good looking dude too, and I get quite a few hot matches, but I also find a lot of them to be flaky/teases. My text game is tight to certain point, I rarely fail to get a girl's # on Tinder when I put my mind to it, but getting them to starting sexting or to agree to a hookup at one of our places without having even met for drinks at a bar first is proving difficult.

I can usually arrange a meet up for drinks, but I live a ways from my city's popular downtown scene, so logistically it is challenging to parlay that into her coming back to my place after.

Presumably if a girl tosses you her number on Tinder after some engaging banter shes down to suck you cawk though, no?

Do you have any tips on how to escalate the texting to the level where she is seduced enough to come over to your place and **** you sight unseen, or vice versa. without that intermediary meetup?

Thanks bro.
 

gravityeyelids

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Heraclius said:
Even still, I'm pretty impressed with your Tinder experience so far.

I'm a pretty good looking dude too, and I get quite a few hot matches, but I also find a lot of them to be flaky/teases. My text game is tight to certain point, I rarely fail to get a girl's # on Tinder when I put my mind to it, but getting them to starting sexting or to agree to a hookup at one of our places without having even met for drinks at a bar first is proving difficult.

I can usually arrange a meet up for drinks, but I live a ways from my city's popular downtown scene, so logistically it is challenging to parlay that into her coming back to my place after.

Presumably if a girl tosses you her number on Tinder after some engaging banter shes down to suck you cawk though, no?

Ehhh not exactly. I would imagine at that point she is at most entertaining the notion of meeting up with you. However theres a good amount of comfort building and sh!t testing that takes place over text before she's willing to meet up. Combine that with the fact that even if she agrees to meet up, she can and will flake for any reason..

Do you have any tips on how to escalate the texting to the level where she is seduced enough to come over to your place and **** you sight unseen, or vice versa. without that intermediary meetup?

Thanks bro.
Honestly, this was a very rare occasion, her inviting me over. I got her interest level very high and she knew i was a few notches above her on the scale. First off it's hard enough to get a girl to meet up for drinks or coffee with this app...Trying for a random bang? Forget about it. Not to mention that any girl willing to come over without meeting you is almost sure to be ugly as fvck. I ran tight game with this girl, but i still attribute it to mostly luck. The only thing my tight game did was prevent a flake. If that makes sense. What i'm saying is that even if you're hot and your text game is on point...it's stilll a rare occurrence...at least in my experience, and i've been at this for over 6 months.

I live outside of my downtown area too, so i would suggest a coffee shop or w/e closer to where you live. If a girl wants to meetup, she wont be opposed to driving a good 10-15 at least usually.

As far as escalating to where shes seduced? Like I said, its going to be extremely rare just getting her to come fvck you. HOWEVER, i have meet probably 5 or 6 girls for coffee or a drink aside from the 2 I banged, and im positive that's your best option. I would avoid making the texting sexual at least at first unless shes making clear signs that she's okay with it.

I've tried the super sexual, super fast escalation in hopes of a single night lay dozens of times, and havent had any luck. You get ignored pretty quick if you take it too fast.

Honestly, with the effort i've put in, I would have gotten far more results if i had channeled that energy into cold approaches at the malls or grocery stores or whatever.
 

Don't always be the one putting yourself out for her. Don't always be the one putting all the effort and work into the relationship. Let her, and expect her, to treat you as well as you treat her, and to improve the quality of your life.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Hmm

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Good work but your ok with random girls sucking you off? Arent you scared about catching anything?
 

gravityeyelids

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Hmm said:
Good work but your ok with random girls sucking you off? Arent you scared about catching anything?
Haha Nope! Not nearly as much as I should be.
 
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