Tell her you are dating other women ?

[ScottMustaine]

This question may seem quite retarded but please read my story, I'll try to make it short.

I knew this girl for 3 years, I managed to get out of the friendzone and get her, we were 1 month in relationship. Then everything went downhill. I broke up with her, and deleted her from my life. Reason: My "friend" was talking bad about me behind my back to her so I would seem as a jerk and *****, trying to get her. She never talks so she started acting crazy and I ended it.

Few months later we somehow managed to become 'friends' and found out about our little 'friend ' . We had some arguments and I told her I won't do anything about our relationship until she comes back from vacation. Since I don't trust her. And that I will date other women. She never believed me when I told her I approached girls and that I'm dating them. Telling me that it's the mask I 'wear' .
Well, the day before she went on vacation, we spent some time together and we were hugging and that ****. Since I told her I won't do anything about relationship before she comes back, I didn't kiss her.

So here comes the deal.

She'll be back 1st of september. I'm already making out two girls. Nothing serious. Few 'friends' know about this and one girl from school that seems she's into me(she saw me with that particular girl). Now girls are great at gossiping and I'm concerned about her telling about my 'womanizing' acts in school. Since almost every time I go out, I'm with some other girl. So everyone thinks of me as a player. Which I'm far from that.

I know I told my ex about dating other woman, but still, I think if she finds out, it's all blown to get back together. On the other hand, staying silent really is torturing me. Since I prefer truth.Always. Even when it's bad for myself.


Thoughts?

 

[ScottMustaine]

I don't understand why you care so much about what your ex gf thinks about you when you were the one that broke up with her. I don't mean to sound harsh but when I was reading your post I just pictured a whiny little b!tch crying. Look buddy learn how to control your emotions. Stop caring about how people SEE you. Shows me you are insecure. You shouldn't be giving a sh!t about what girls are going to say about you. They will always talk. As for your friend who bad mouthed you behind your back... I would drop that joke and never talk to him again. Sounds like the dude is jealous of you. You're 18 years old man. You should be spinning mad plates and not putting up with stupid sh!t from girls.

Yeah, the dude is jealous of me. I broke up with her since the **** HE MADE, was FALSE about HER. So I got wrong picture and broke up not because she did bad things, but because of HIS doing. Get it ?

 

[HalfPUAHalfAFC]

Dude, are you wanting to stumble right out of the gate?

You are young and just now learning to attract women and spin plates. Some guys never get as far as you.

It sounds like you want a monogamous relationship with this ONE GIRL. Are you on this board to attract one girl at a time? If so, you'll be back in months asking why she did this, what you should do, how to get her back, etc.

This is not a relationship board.

You could potentially have a long, great journey ahead of you. You could learn the skills to have many women in your life. Part of the early part of that journey is dealing with the jealous women develop, especially those that want to lock you down. If you let them, than can turn you into a whiney beta quick.

Take a longer view. Yes, petty adolescents might start to call you a player. If they see you making out with different girls all the time, you'll get a reputation for that. At this stage, that might even work against you.

But, if you try to be dating 3 women at the same time and make sure they all know about it, THEN you value will go way up. Instead of being seen as using girls for quick ego-boosting saliva sessions, you'll be seen as a guy the women want and can date a few simultaneously. That will create a situation where even more women will be attracted to you.

Don't be a loser player simply using chicks in your circle for short selfish reasons. Rather, but a guy many women want who can handle dating a few at a time. Be the boss and learn how to do that and you'll have years of adventures.

 

[ScottMustaine]

Dude, are you wanting to stumble right out of the gate?

You are young and just now learning to attract women and spin plates. Some guys never get as far as you.

It sounds like you want a monogamous relationship with this ONE GIRL. Are you on this board to attract one girl at a time? If so, you'll be back in months asking why she did this, what you should do, how to get her back, etc.

This is not a relationship board.

You could potentially have a long, great journey ahead of you. You could learn the skills to have many women in your life. Part of the early part of that journey is dealing with the jealous women develop, especially those that want to lock you down. If you let them, than can turn you into a whiney beta quick.

Take a longer view. Yes, petty adolescents might start to call you a player. If they see you making out with different girls all the time, you'll get a reputation for that. At this stage, that might even work against you.

But, if you try to be dating 3 women at the same time and make sure they all know about it, THEN you value will go way up. Instead of being seen as using girls for quick ego-boosting saliva sessions, you'll be seen as a guy the women want and can date a few simultaneously. That will create a situation where even more women will be attracted to you.

Don't be a loser player simply using chicks in your circle for short selfish reasons. Rather, but a guy many women want who can handle dating a few at a time. Be the boss and learn how to do that and you'll have years of adventures.

I never had a Long Term Relationship. I actually intended to do what you just said. After finishing the LTR with this one. She's at the moment the girl with most chances of having sex with her. I'm a virgin. Yes. Still. I can't bring any girl to my home because of my crazy grandmother. Can't stay late at night either, nor sleep at someone elses house. So I don't know where to bring a girl to **** her. Except at my ex's place where I got actually some chances to do it. Last time I did , she had her peroid so I got handjob and after that... I broke up with her later.
I want to try once again to be in LTR ,which I never had, and after that I'm going into poly game.

Ex is so persisting, showing extreme attraction now. Almost obsessive. This obsession will continue for years and years. I'm actually thinking being in relationship 3 months. Then become beta and get kicked out. If I continue with my alphaness I always did she won't back off. :box:

 

[logarithm]

I've had one LTR and also tended to be very honest with my ex.
In this situation I would say not to talk about the other girls though - it's not her business, you've told her in advance about that and it's just better for both you and her.
Just learn how to keep secrets and deal better with them

 

[ScottMustaine]

I've had one LTR and also tended to be very honest with my ex.
In this situation I would say not to talk about the other girls though - it's not her business, you've told her in advance about that and it's just better for both you and her.
Just learn how to keep secrets and deal better with them

Thank you for the answer. Same goes for HalfPuaHalfAfc. Has been informative.

Also. What do you think would be an appropriate way to somehow tell this girl I'm seeing that we will last until the 31st august ?

It's not like we are in a relationship. Also she regards me as 'boyfriend' .

Just tell her I don't want nothing serious, she isn't material for 'relationship' , or drop her off when the time is right ?

 

[6nemesis9]

I haven't read all the answers but I think the best thing to do are:
1. Cutting all contact coming from you;
2. Not giving a **** about telling her anything about your life, so no, don't tell her you date girls. Usually guys who talk about how they date other girls or they kiss etc. are seen as qualyfing betas so you don't get any jealousy points;
3. ****ing not only those 2 girls but finding at least 10 others to have sex with.
4. Moving on with your life, hobbies, job, passions etc.

 

[ScottMustaine]

I haven't read all the answers but I think the best thing to do are:
1. Cutting all contact coming from you;
2. Not giving a **** about telling her anything about your life, so no, don't tell her you date girls. Usually guys who talk about how they date other girls or they kiss etc. are seen as qualyfing betas so you don't get any jealousy points;
3. ****ing not only those 2 girls but finding at least 10 others to have sex with.
4. Moving on with your life, hobbies, job, passions etc.

Thanks for the answer.

1. All of them are initiating contacts.
2. Got it. I usually don't talk about that , but something went into me.
3. Roger that.
4. My life is constantly rolling. If it's boring, I make something to keep me in action. Now with hobbies I'm not that destructive. Climbing, Cycling, playing in bands, socializing with people is enough I guess. :rockon: