Stop Living In Fear

[Nutz]

After a thread I commented on over at RSD about amogging, I've come to realize that for a lot of guys in the community it really comes down to fear that's driving this ideal to live in your own reality. If you can't succeed in life and the world around you, make up a new one in your head! /sarcasm That's the gist of what I'm getting around community, and for me that's not a good thing. Delusional is a form of crazy, and for good reason. Don't get me wrong. I'll all for a healthy dose of reframing, but flatly ignoring reality serves no useful purpose unless you're so scared of reality that you need to live in your own. If that shakes people up because they've been swallowing this "live in your own reality" psychobabble then so be it.

I'm a pragmatic realist. I want results based on what is attainable for me and in the world in which I live. It's analogous to martial arts and how people think what they're fed in their McDojo is what it's like in the real world. These MA's often swallow their instructor's teachings as absolute truth, and don't really explore what's true for themselves. In the end they often find they can't fight their way out of a paper bag when the sh1t hits the fan, and I've seen this true of the pickup community as well. I find people get into a particular school of thought, dismiss all others as being incorrect (for whatever reason), and live in this little bubble of reframes, hero worship, and blind devotion. I started along that path and recognized the cult-like status some figures in the community evoke.

Again,it's similar to the mentality martial artists get into with "my art is better than your art". The truth is that it's all about the individual. I feel lucky coming from a JKD background as I've been able to apply my 14 years of training philosophy to my pickup training. I've found what works for me, and sadly the approach I see many guys taking isn't the best course of action, especially when it leads to accepting a guru's advice simply because that person is looked up to. I suggest people get out, try things for themselves, and live their lives.

Bottom line: check yourself.

 

[Bonafide]

This is a great post, really makes you think...thanks.

 

[loving]

Yes you do need to do whats best for you..

 

[Interceptor]

What you're addressing is the extreme perception of Avoidance.
When people's life gets to be too depressing and unfulfilled, sometimes they take these very helpful teachings into the extreme and do go about it in a self delusional manner. So they follow some religious dogma or whatever, and self delud themselves into what it called "Avoidance".

But these people need professional help, and the average self improvement person does not go off the deep end like that.

Creating one's Reality is a REAL thing.

As what we give energy by way of thought to is drawn into our lives.


That's why it is important to reflect on our lives , circumstances, and conditions and realize that like it or not, we are not victims, and your circumstances and environment ARE the product of years previously spent thinking about those things.
The thing is, most people dont take into consideration their sub conscious.
And just how powerful their sub conscious is in manifesting the things they 'resonate' with.
Since so many people live life 'checked out' living in a reactionary manner, according to a primal ego feeding, and without conscious decision making, of course people will be quick to dismiss things like the Law of Attraction.
Because they see commone 'evidence' of every other person who lives checked out and they use it as proof of their condition.Theyve spent their lives drawing things into their experience because of the frequency their sub conscious is resonating at.

But the real test, as in martial art, is to be master of Time and Space.
Thus, despite what my opponent 'does' to me, I respond, not react, in a manner that best serves me and my interest.
So that ultimately, Mastery is being able to do what I want despite whatever my opponent does.
Such in life.
Mastery is being able to create your 'kingdom' despite the contrary evidence around you.
Sure , previousy, perhaps your spending habits were unresponsible, and you have made poor buying decisions.
But you are NEVER locked into that circumstance. You can change it for the better, to something more sutiable and honoring of yourself. YOu are the sum of your decisions. And sure, you may see a crummy apartment around you, and be convinced thats all you will ever have in your life, but it's only 'true' if you alow yourself to believe it's true. Thus, re affirming the Victim mode and disempowerment which is actually NORMAL and COMMON behavior nowadays, strangely enough...
(ie you see enough people with full beards or something, and you will assume that everyone in the world has a beard. When it's not true. You succumb to a belief, and then become lazy and dont challenge it. If one see enough people jump off a cliff, is that motivation enough to jump off a cliff too??? Sure, it may seem common and normal. But is it? Really???)
But most people never get past that.
They see their circumstance and then proclaim that that is all they will ever have or be or do in life.


Very important distinctions to be made here.