Stood up AGAIN!

[Firefly]

So after last night's debacle, I was looking forward to meeting up with another girl tonight.

We had arranged to meet up at 6, and she seemed super-keen to meet. However, at 5:30PM I received the following text:

"Hi! I am still at uni. Do you mind meeting at 7?".

Like an idiot, I responded with this:

"No problem, as long as you buy me a drink. Meet at (location) at 7?"

Then at 7, I get the following:

"I will have to buy you two drinks. I waiting for my train ".

After last night, I just lost it at this point and the following text conversation ensued:

Me: How long will it be? If it is too long a delay, perhaps we should make it another night.
Her: Maybe. 40 minutes. What do you think.
Me: I don't think I want to wait around in the city for two hours. Some other time.
Her: I am saying that I would be there in 40 minutes, but yes, you probably do not want to wait anymore. Where do you live.
Me: Near (location).
Her: I live in (location). Is it far?
Me: Don't worry about it.
Her: Yes I do! I want to see you.
Me: Making people wait around for two hours isn't a good way to make an impression. You should remember that for your next marketing interview (One reason this girl wants to meet me is because she wants to break into marketing, and I can offer her a foot in the door).
Her: I am sorry. I do not know what to say now. I did not count with any of this.
Me: That's cool.
Her: I am not like this. I am very professional but I know this is not the way to prove it.
Me: No problem.

And that was the end of the interaction.

So I obviously have her on the back foot - any one think I can use this to my advantage? Or should I forget about this one as well?

 

[Tiguere]

She asked you where do you live because she wanted to chill at your house ..thus skipping the drinks . I think you messed up here.

 

[Firefly]

She asked you where do you live because she wanted to chill at your house ..thus skipping the drinks . I think you messed up here.

Doh! Except I don't have a place I can take her to anyway. Should I text her to invite myself over tonight, or wait a few days?

 

[jophil28]

So after last night's debacle, I was looking forward to meeting up with another girl tonight.

We had arranged to meet up at 6, and she seemed super-keen to meet. However, at 5:30PM I received the following text:

"Hi! I am still at uni. Do you mind meeting at 7?".

Like an idiot, I responded with this:

"No problem, as long as you buy me a drink. Meet at (location) at 7?"

Then at 7, I get the following:

"I will have to buy you two drinks. I waiting for my train ".

After last night, I just lost it at this point and the following text conversation ensued:

Me: How long will it be? If it is too long a delay, perhaps we should make it another night.
Her: Maybe. 40 minutes. What do you think.

^^THis is where you should have taken control and CALMLY told her go home instead.
She would have contacted you the next day with a fresh offer.

This woman is an awful time manager.

 

[Shivastorm_88]

Fire is the solution here.

 

[joe henny]

Wow homie are you serious, she didn't flake on you tard she had a real circumstance hope u had fun with palmela. Did she ever call you back? Your harsh lol

 

[Firefly]

Wow homie are you serious, she didn't flake on you tard she had a real circumstance hope u had fun with palmela. Did she ever call you back? Your harsh lol

Yup, cos when a girl has genuine interest in you, she waits an hour and ten minutes after the time you were supposed to come to your appointment, knowing it will take another 40 minutes to get there ...

 

[Firefly]

Anyway, so I sent the girl a text a few houes later saying "Had dinner, and feel a bit calmer. Want to try one more time?" She wrote back, being all apologetic. She tried to ask for my Skype and Facebook so we could chat but I declined both, saying I preferred to meet face to face and that she would have to do a lot to make up for her past behaviour. She has now offered to meet up on Tuesday night. I am only free after 9:30PM - Should I accept? Or make her wait until next week (as I am already booked out every night before then)?

 

[Darth_Qurashi]

ya man, just try to tone down the guilt trips man, it makes u look to self-righteous and stuff.

if she didn't wanna see you, i doubt she would even txt you apologizing and explaining.

dont make it seem like meeting up means so much to you by showing her that you're really mad. just be calm, let her know it was annoying, but you didn't lose sleep over it or anything.

 

[Firefly]

Good points Darth; I should avoid looking like I am trying to actively guilt trip her.

That being said, I am not sure I agree with your point about how if she did not want to see me, she would not text and apologise - In my experience, girls will always make up excuses for flaky behaviour because they do not want to be seen as, or even admit to themselves that they are being, rude. That does not mean they will actually take the time to meet you.

I do agree that the approach you descirbe of being calm, but annoyed at their behaviour, is a good one.

 

[mustfirstregister]

You were inpatient and it's was written all over your face.

 

[Firefly]

You were inpatient and it's was written all over your face.

So I should have waited around for two hours for her? Right ....

 

[f283000]

You were inpatient and it's was written all over your face.

Not impatient. If she had been meeting Brad Pitt instead of OP she would have moved mountains, ran like the wind, pushed everybody aside including grandmas on strollers AND SHE WOULD HAVE BEEN THERE 10 MINUTES EARLY!

If a woman is interested in you she will move mountains to see you. You won't hear excuses about being busy, being late, has homework to do, meeting with her girlfriends or other people, missed a bus, a train or whatever.

She being punctual is a test of her interest level just like many other things.

 

[HalfAddict]

You have no stock in this chick, she wants to date you so you can help her get a job and she still can't make it on time. You should have not even bothered texting with her left and went somewhere else.

When I'm gonna be on a date I turn my damn phone off, and if she is a new date I'll leave wherever I'm at after about a half hour.

Or she is legit and just a tard who can't manage her time, but honestly If I have a hot date I'm not fvcking around about getting to the location.

Do you really want to go out with her that bad? She'll most likely just stand you up again, NEXT.

 

[Firefly]

Exactly my point, f283000. I am still laughing at the image of mustfirstregister waiting for date after date for 2+ hours, saying to himself "I don't want to look like I am inpatient (It's impatient, by the way) written all over my face".

So anyway, I texted this chick this morning after making her wait an evening, and said I could come by her place, but only after 9:30. She responded straight away with "Great! No problem". We will see what happens on Tuesday ...

 

[nismo-4]

f283000 makes a very funny but great point Firefly.

Judge nismo knows that it doesn't matter if she sounds super keen to meet or acts totally into you. She still has to actually date or go out with you. I thought the Ohio State Buckeyes would beat Wisconsin. They still had to play the game and Ohio State got owned.

The fact is, she's just not that into you. IOI's are to be taken with a grain of salt. The fact that she stood you up is proof that she's iffy about dating you. If Usher or Brad Pitt asked her for a date, she'd make sure she's there early and will break through walls and move fast like Sonic if she's late!

Finally, Firefly, she texted enthusiastically. That don't mean sh*t until she's on a date with you. You need to be spinning more plates during this time. Not spinning more plates will make you guilty of the crime of Simple Oneitis. This just has a fine of being flown out to Worrying Bay, Wisconsin. Keeping your options open will prevent you from committing this crime.

Case closed. Good luck with this girl.

 

[joe henny]

Yup, cos when a girl has genuine interest in you, she waits an hour and ten minutes after the time you were supposed to come to your appointment, knowing it will take another 40 minutes to get there ...

Many Many Many people are horrible at time management...especially WOMEN that doesn't mean she doesn't wanna eff your brains out. It just means she bad with time.

 

[Falcon25]

You over reacted. You sound like a fuvking idiot. You are holding your power over her head. She's not into you. She wants to meet you so she can get in on a job. You reek of insecurity. If you played this cool, she would have fuvked you 40 min later. But, like most men with power, or in this case a job interview, you over reacted. Good job.

I know exactly the type of guy you are. You have very serious issues when it comes to women. And since, you have this "power" over her, you felt empowered to go off on her. But in reality, you are much worse than that. You do this type of thing with male friends too. You are "special" right? You can just act like on here that "you don't give a fuvk" but yet you took the time to post this. It's bothering you so much that you came on an anonymous board to express what you did. YOU SHOWED HER! WAY TO GO CHAMP! Try getting a girl with NO tools at your disposal. I do that every day. It's very easy to fuvk a girl if you have something she materialistically needs.

Wow, she has "a lot to do" to make it up to you? What did she do? That she was going to be 40 min late? Oh, did you have to wait a little longer than you should princess? Let me ask you something, how tall are you? Do you have a small divk? Because that is how men with insecurities act. You need a good ass beating on not just your attitude, but how you treat other people. This chick will fuvk you, but just remember WHY. Pompous prick.

 

[blackwolf]

i would of met up at her place. you probably lost a fuk that night.

 

[EA Gold]

Instead of feeling bad about yourself mate, why not just celebrate by doing your favorite activity. Like playin futbol or eating at your favorite restaurant and tell the broad that its your birthday

Do whatever, call your friends have good time and just tell yourself how much fun she is missing with a fun and happy lad like you.

Forget her, when you start having a good time they'll be looking for you.
cheers