Marcopolo
Senior Don Juan
I am bitterly dissappointed in myself and what happened tonight. There was this one woman who I contacted via an internet site. She lives about 2 hours from me but she seemed really interesting and her photos were attractive. So I actually went out there to see her, we planned dinner at her favorite Thai Resturaunt and afterwards we planned on going to see a movie.
When I met her she exceeded my expectations, and was an interesting person to talk to. I admit I did not do my best at times. I showed her some of my oil paintings over the internet and she said a lot of deep things about them that I had never thought of. When she asked me what was going through my mind when I did them I was like ????, I was just painting a pretty sunset or whatever, I dunno what I was thinking (which it the truth, but she is into the arts and all that interpertation stuff).
Afterwards, we went to the movie and took my car. It was about a 15 minute drive and she had to give me directions because I was unfamiliar with the area. The traffic was also horrible and it took some effort to find parking. I was concentrating on that instead of being social, but felt uncomfortable.
We finally parked, and got tickets for a later show. We went to get some ice cream and she asked me why I was so shy. One major difficulty I have is the more attracted to a woman i am the shyer I am with her. I am so afraid of saying something stupid and screwing it up that I have difficulty being myself. I admitted I was a bit nervous and stressed about traffic, etc. At that point she suggested we end it and said it wasn't working. Of course, I cannot change her mind so we got our tickets refunded and I dropped her off. It was the worst feeling.
The irony was just the day before I met a chick who was much fatter than she said she was, and we met for coffee and I basically acted like a jerk and I didn't care just to get rif of her. Of course she voulenteers to give me her number. And then there is eveything in between. Generally the less interested I am in a woman, or the less I consider her to be LTR material, the easier it is to be successful with her. But when an hb8-10(like this gal was) who is just the type I want to be with-classy, intelligent, interesting, no kids, etc. I totally freeze up and start acting like a driveling AFC again. And then of course the date ends horribly like it did. Some of you will tell me to go read the DJ bible again, but knowing what you are supposed to do and doing it under stress are two different things (and I really REALLY wanted to hit it off with her physically right away, she was already giving me blueballs - but perhaps unlike most of you, I wait for the women to give me some sort of physical sign, like touching my hand or brushing against me).
She thought I wrote a great profile, and cannot believe I was the same person. I did write a ****y and funny type profile that probably gets me more responses than I otherwise would get, and it is my own profile- not borrowed from some other DJ(my profile is too good perhaps, and they expect me to be a professional comedian for them?).
I think I can at times be better at the written word than expressing myself in person. With previous girlfriends I have had them tell me they cannot believe it is the same person who wrote them the love letter and the real me. Especially early in the relationship before I am totally comfortable with them, I apparently express myself more openly in writing. I am just really bummed right now. i just turn into a complete AFC around women I want a LTR with.
When I met her she exceeded my expectations, and was an interesting person to talk to. I admit I did not do my best at times. I showed her some of my oil paintings over the internet and she said a lot of deep things about them that I had never thought of. When she asked me what was going through my mind when I did them I was like ????, I was just painting a pretty sunset or whatever, I dunno what I was thinking (which it the truth, but she is into the arts and all that interpertation stuff).
Afterwards, we went to the movie and took my car. It was about a 15 minute drive and she had to give me directions because I was unfamiliar with the area. The traffic was also horrible and it took some effort to find parking. I was concentrating on that instead of being social, but felt uncomfortable.
We finally parked, and got tickets for a later show. We went to get some ice cream and she asked me why I was so shy. One major difficulty I have is the more attracted to a woman i am the shyer I am with her. I am so afraid of saying something stupid and screwing it up that I have difficulty being myself. I admitted I was a bit nervous and stressed about traffic, etc. At that point she suggested we end it and said it wasn't working. Of course, I cannot change her mind so we got our tickets refunded and I dropped her off. It was the worst feeling.
The irony was just the day before I met a chick who was much fatter than she said she was, and we met for coffee and I basically acted like a jerk and I didn't care just to get rif of her. Of course she voulenteers to give me her number. And then there is eveything in between. Generally the less interested I am in a woman, or the less I consider her to be LTR material, the easier it is to be successful with her. But when an hb8-10(like this gal was) who is just the type I want to be with-classy, intelligent, interesting, no kids, etc. I totally freeze up and start acting like a driveling AFC again. And then of course the date ends horribly like it did. Some of you will tell me to go read the DJ bible again, but knowing what you are supposed to do and doing it under stress are two different things (and I really REALLY wanted to hit it off with her physically right away, she was already giving me blueballs - but perhaps unlike most of you, I wait for the women to give me some sort of physical sign, like touching my hand or brushing against me).
She thought I wrote a great profile, and cannot believe I was the same person. I did write a ****y and funny type profile that probably gets me more responses than I otherwise would get, and it is my own profile- not borrowed from some other DJ(my profile is too good perhaps, and they expect me to be a professional comedian for them?).
I think I can at times be better at the written word than expressing myself in person. With previous girlfriends I have had them tell me they cannot believe it is the same person who wrote them the love letter and the real me. Especially early in the relationship before I am totally comfortable with them, I apparently express myself more openly in writing. I am just really bummed right now. i just turn into a complete AFC around women I want a LTR with.
