Speed Dating success vs Online success

[gradhodude]

Just wondering if guys have had the same response rate. Just a little background as I am new here. So I broke up with my GF 3 1/2 months ago. She was older (40)and I am 36. She was ready for kids/marriage after a year, and I just couldn't commit. I took a couple months off, but back ready to get back in the game.

I signed up for match.com not really sure why as I have never had any luck with it in the past. I have been on it a little over a month and sent out around 20 emails with no responses. I have received 1 email from a girl that lived like 30 miles away and was a little plump, and around 7 winks from overweight chicks. Complete terrible response rate. I have checked out POF..but the quality there is terrible, and okcupid is not much better.

I then signed up for a speed dating event 28-40, as I remember 3-4 years ago I had a blast and met a hot chick, and we went out a few times. So I said what the heck. I thought this could be a confidence booster, and you know what it was, but the problem was that is all it was. There was maybe a couple cute girls, one was black (not really into) and 1 was older (don't want to do that again) and the rest were probably 4-7's. I figured I would circle a few girls just to test the waters, and circled 5 out of 14. All 5 responded yes and I had another 5 that said yes and I said no. That is 10 out of 14...which is a pretty incredible attach rate. I have received 3 emails from these chicks, but I am not interested.

I am thinking speed dating might be a good avenue...just need to go younger 24-36 or something, but those seem limited. Any others have similar experiences? And if you are thinking about speed dating...I would say do it. At very least it boosts up your confidence.

 

[( . )( . )]

Speed/internet dating is a veritable cornucopia of sub-par swamp hogs, cluster B's and wall slamming, egg expiring desperado's. It's as rare as hens teeth to find a gold nugget in all that mess, I wouldn't be putting too much stock into any of it unless your specifically after pump and dumps.

http://www.mts.net/~bpony/djbible/

 

[Who Dares Win]

We are all looking for the holy grail or the promised land, a land of green pasture where fat women or ugly ones do not exist and where women are good looking and available to us.

The problems is except for few countries in this world this place doesnt exist and if there was hordes of afc and desperate men would ruin it.

Ask yourself if a goodlooking pleasable girl would have to rely on any way to meet men, why would it be?
She is either really shy or she has something which counterbalance her look.

As you found out, sure the girls were available but the quality ones were expiring or already expired.

There is a reason why bmw doesnt make discounts while skoda does.

The only way to get high quality girls is to be high quality yourself, no sh1t about it.

 

[gradhodude]

Agree on all accounts. The only way to really meet high quality chicks is step up and do it. Guys aren't going to get handed anything to us....but once we got it....it's pretty easy to keep!

 

[Dust 2 Dust]

I've been on POF, OKCupid, and Eharmony and my conclusion is that online dating is a complete waste of time and money. Women online tend to be ultra hypergamous and expect GQ models when they themselves are just blah. If she looks attractive believe me it's a lie. Agree to meet someone from POF and I guarantee she's going to be the fugliest woman in the bar. The good looking ones will have character flaws that cause men to pump and dump then run to the hills.

 

[englishman]

I tried it a couple of times. It was pretty funny, I'm 50 so no spring chicken and the women were all over 40, but still had way over the top expectations.
This is no sh1t.... one women asked to look at my hands. I asked her why, and she said in this sing song voice "gotta watch out for the worker hands" as in if you work with your hands your rejected.
Another said to me "you see that guy over there, I know whey he's not married. I saw him go to the washroom in the break and he didnt put the toilet seat down" and she meant it.
Same sh1t different venue.

 

[Bushmaster]

.... one women asked to look at my hands. I asked her why, and she said in this sing song voice "gotta watch out for the worker hands" as in if you work with your hands your rejected...
Same sh1t different venue.

:facepalm:

I generally treat online dating as purely booty-calls...there were three I met that that I didn't even want to bang once.

 

[Colossus]

After years of online dating I'm starting to agree with the majority here. I've dated probably 4 or 5 dozen girls I met online and had LTRs with 3 of them. My general impression is that finding a gem online is just like finding a geological gem----it's exceedingly rare. And for the record, I think the girls I was in LTRs with were what most would consider "quality", at least on paper. But, generally speaking, once a chick is past 30 and still single there is something precluding them from being snatched up and wedded. Entitlement, difficult personality type, ridiculous expectations, hyper-career mode, etc.

The caveat I'll add is that there are so many people using online dating now that statistically you will get a Gaussian (bell curve) distribution and have some good stock in there. The vast majority, however, are decidedly average.

 

[Mike32ct]

I went to a speed dating event when I was say 26. I really enjoyed it, but was clueless about women at the time.

This HB7.5 dropped in our "eight minute date" something to the effect of "Most people I hit it off with, it's just for the night." I wasn't experienced with female translations at the time, so I had no clue what she meant.

She wanted to know what I was doing later. I told her I was going to Club xyz (next door to the bar we were at). She comes into the club ALONE. She talks to me for a bit. I run out of stuff to say and eject. She probably left with somebody else. The old Mike was so clueless it's painful to think about it.

But overall, yes, I really liked speed dating. I wanted to go to a M A T CH singles party this week, but I have to work late. But the next event I can go to, I'll try it, be it speed dating or a singles party.

However, I suspect the quality has gone way down. Years ago, when online and speed dating were new, the women were decent.

 

[blueeyedgent]

I cleaned house speed dating the 2 times I tried. Got dates with every chick I wanted to. Had to sit through some undesirables as well but I just breezed thru those with a smile.

The last one I got 6/6 on dates and the speed dating company been calling me LOL. Even have offered spaces for free LMAO.

PS forgot to add... expect 1/3 to 1/2 to flake even if you get a "match". Usual chick rules apply to speed dating too!

 

[MatureDJ]

Just wondering if guys have had the same response rate. Just a little background as I am new here. So I broke up with my GF 3 1/2 months ago. She was older (40)and I am 36. She was ready for kids/marriage after a year, and I just couldn't commit.

40 and ready for kids? Isn't that a bit late?

 

[MatureDJ]

I cleaned house speed dating the 2 times I tried. Got dates with every chick I wanted to. Had to sit through some undesirables as well but I just breezed thru those with a smile.

The last one I got 6/6 on dates and the speed dating company been calling me LOL. Even have offered spaces for free LMAO.

PS forgot to add... expect 1/3 to 1/2 to flake even if you get a "match". Usual chick rules apply to speed dating too!

AIUI, speed dating has quite a few more women who sign up for men, so managers are interested in getting more men. It's the opposite of a swinger's night (where men pay up the wazoo while couples pay a small price and single women get in for free.)

 

[pdx1138]

40 and ready for kids? Isn't that a bit late?

I know right!?!

That and it's almost impossible to knock one up at that age.

 

[Demonpenz]

My mom had me when she was 40... and I'm like reaaaaal retarded.

 

[Albatross953]

I'd just really like it if the women on pof had to post a full body shot. No smoke, mirrors, angles. How many do I have to meet in person just to realize it's a year old pre putting the weight back on pic? And yeah, I'm going to he'll.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Mike,
"I run out of stuff to say and eject"......That is quite normal,but one of the advantages of writing to dozens of Women,Two Ton Tessies or not,is that in a measured and stress free environment you have plenty of time to initiate and respond to their concerns....Over time,like learning a Foreign Language,the carefully scripted responses and initiators start flowing...Bingo you can hold a Ladies attention.