So I met this stripper (the conclusion)

[SpartanWarrior77]

Alright guys, I have an update on the stripper story... By the way, I know that this is a long read but trust me it's worth it. I had a red-pill psychologist (friend of mine) read the whole thing and he said it was absolute GOLD and asked me if he could use it in some of his therapy sessions (to which I happily agreed) so get a drink and get ready for a hard-won story...

In my initial post, I said that I wanted to meet her in the city first and see how the interaction would go. If it went well, then I said I would invite her to my parent's house for New Years. Once again, I had no intention of LTR'ing her and my parents were told this in advance.

I ended up going to the city to meet her up. I myself had to drive 2 hours and pay expensive tolls to get to her. I then purchased tickets to a nice museum, got some alcohol for both of us, and would end up buying some food later. Some might say that this is overkill but in this context, I believe it was right of me to be generous (she purchased plane tickets and hotel). All in all, she seemingly went more out of her way than I did.

Upon meeting, we both drank a little bit to calm our nerves. It had been roughly 4-5 months since we'd seen each other. The energy was good.

The next few hours were spent gently making our way to the museum. We held hands and the vibe was very romantic. The conversation revolved around the things we were both up to in the past few months.

At this point, what was interesting is that she didn't bother painting a picture of perfect virtue. She made it a point to tell me things that revealed her dark side. I don't know why she did this. Was it because she wanted to be authentic with me due to her genuine desire for me? Was it because she knew I wasn't a simp and that a little bit of strategic disclosure/vulnerability would disarm me? I am going to go with the darkest possible interpretation bc that is the one we need to protect ourselves against as red-pill men.

Throughout the day, she proceeded to tell me about many of the men she "hustled" in her stripper days:

"If they were obviously drunk, I would tell the clerk to charge them for 5 songs instead of 2 and they would pay it!"
"I wouldn't waste time on guys that were broke. I learned to quickly identify the cheap ones and the ones that had the money."
"One older guy let me live in his vacation house rent-free for a year (she was asked to house-watch) without me having to do any sexual favors."
"There is this older guy that just buys me stuff whenever I want."

She even told me a story about how her stripper-friend was dating a guy who didn't know she was a stripper. The guy was rich and would buy her all kinds of stuff right in the beginning of their dating (phones, expensive dinners, etc). She said the guy heard that she was a stripper from someone else and both of them "played like perfect actors" and denied the whole thing.

What was interesting was her tone of voice while she told these stories. It seemed like to her all of this was play and just a harmless byproduct of living that life. Reminder: She said she got out of stripping right after she met me (which I believe is true due to the fact that she is 26 and is entering the epiphany phase + I know people that go to her club and nobody reported seeing her there recently).

There were definite covert signals of her wanting something serious with me. She kept saying things like:

"I dreamed about you several times and knew I would see you again."
"It's so hard to find looove these days."
etc

Not only that but she kept showering me with attention. Kept insisting that we take selfies of us kissing. She also kept implying that she came to my region just to see me.

Fast forward, we were back at her hotel towards the late evening. Things quickly led to sex and it was great. She really made it a point to satisfy me. I felt genuine desire on her end. I even woke her up in the middle of the night for a BJ which she happily gave me.

Then after some morning sex and conversation, I left saying "I had some friends to see and business to take care of." I said that I would let her know about potential New Years events.

Later in the day, I decided that she wasn't too needy and that bringing her over for New Years would be okay. However, she broke down and sent me a long text saying that she felt like I didn't actually like her and that she didn't feel like I wanted anything serious with her. We went back and forth a couple of times and I managed to save her as a plate but only for the future. She told me to come visit her in her state if I still wanna see her but that it would be too "emotionally uncomfortable" to spend New Years with me now that knows where I stand (during our back and forth, I ended up overtly saying that I wasn't interested in a relationship).

We ended on a relatively positive note. I wasn't a dyck about it and I let her know that I still valued/appreciated her but that I wasn't looking for anything too serious. She seemed to be okay with my answer and said that we can continue seeing each other in the future if anything.

I legitimately felt sad for her but...

A man needs to realize...

You can't be so identified with the feminine imperative. You need to just focus on your own imperative (spinning plates, gaming women, learning seduction, fun sex life, etc) within reason.

So what if she feels sad? So what if she spent some time with a guy who wasn't serious about an LTR? So what if I took advantage of her desire for me in order to have some fun?

Throughout this whole process, I was respectful and I invested time, money, and energy into the interaction.

Did she care about all of the guys that she hustled, led on, and enjoyed significant financial/time investments from?

The answer is NO. To her, this was all "part of the game".

So the small benefit that I got from gaming her, banging her, and ultimately rejecting her desire for an LTR is nothing compared to the benefits she experiences all the time from guys that just want to be around a young/pretty girl.

Part of my instinctive wiring and blue pill conditioning feels apologetic for having "wasted her time" but that's all it is: blue-pill conditioning and instinctive empathy for small/feminine creatures (protector instinct).

As a man, I did exactly what I was supposed to. I enjoyed the sexual/financial/emotional investments of a hot and willing female. That is how it's like to be an alpha guys. Get used to it. Yes, when you're not used to it, you can't help but feel like you're being bad/cold/evil whatever. But that is not true.


Why should her imperative be more important than mine?

How come she gets to ride the ****-carousel, be a stripper for years, enjoy tons of financial/time investments from all these sucker guys only to then decide that she's getting older (epiphany phase) and wants to settle down with a man like me (above average fit, good at seduction, high status in social circles, etc)? How come I should feel bad about not participating in her optimizing the fvck out of her hypergamy? At what point do men draw the line and make themselves their own mental point of origin unapologetically? Does this mean I'm going cold? No... I am just building an awesome sex-life based on my imperative (and I am respectful and reasonable with women as I do this if I may add) so no...I am doing EXACTLY what I should be doing...

It is INSANE how deep the blue-pill conditioning is and how INSIDIOUS the desire to put the feminine imperative above your own can be...

P.s. It's funny bc when I told my mom that the stripper left after I told her I wasn't interested in having a GF. My mom said "You're an idiot. You shouldn't have said that. You should have kept things as vague as possible." My mom didn't know the full story but its hilarious to see a 60 y old woman (she used to be a high caliber man-eater in her day) remind me of the amorality of game. Women don't really value morality anyway. All that matters is strength at the end of the day...

 

[Serenity]

That's one long rationalization about how it's ok to lead women on because they lead men on.

I personally hate deception. Casual relationships can be had without anyone being deceived or hurt. People deceive the opposite sex because of fear of loss, they believe or know that the other person is there only on the hope that it may develop into something more serious and as such conceal their true intention due to this fear. I'm not sure what's alpha about it, it's a coward's strategy IMO.

 

[SpartanWarrior77]

Damn, I put a lot of work into that post just to be called a coward in the end. I am going to not let that get to me because I posted this here to get feedback. First of all, Rollo talks about the importance of being covert when you communicate. At no point whatsoever did I tell her that I was interested in anything serious. I only hung out with her one time before this all happened. Why should I throw all of my cards on the table and tell her that I wasn't looking for anything serious? Even if I was looking for something serious, a second date is not when you have "the talk" with someone. Was I totally in the wrong for hanging out with her a second time without mentioning anything about the future? I don't think your comment is fair sir. When she called me out for it, I told her the truth so I think I acted within reason.

 

[Lookatu]

she is 26 and is entering the epiphany phase

It looks like you might've had your own epiphany phase.

Bottom line is everyone knows that LTR's can't work other than just being casual so it's not realistic to expect anything serious.

Plus with her living far away, you don't know what kind of life she has back there or if she's trying to monkey branch to you from her current sugar daddy(s).

But the fact that she self sabotaged herself by over-thinking and canceling NYE with you is on her.

I've had many women that has self-sabotaged themselves with over-thinking and broke it off with me. Oh well, their loss and their problem. I can't change nor am I going to make and effort and try to rationalize their hamster mentality. I know better...

 

[SpartanWarrior77]

It looks like you might've had your own epiphany phase.

Bottom line is everyone knows that LTR's can't work other than just being casual so it's not realistic to expect anything serious.

Plus with her living far away, you don't know what kind of life she has back there or if she's trying to monkey branch to you from her current sugar daddy(s).

But the fact that she self sabotaged herself by over-thinking and canceling NYE with you is on her.

I've had many women that has self-sabotaged themselves with over-thinking and broke it off with me. Oh well, their loss and their problem. I can't change nor am I going to make and effort and try to rationalize their hamster mentality. I know better...

Lmao, that was exactly my conclusion too. She sabotaged herself bc by being with me, we could have still had a great time. Plus she could have gotten more connections herself. I know a lot of people and by her being in my social circle, she could have benefited. This could have developed into somewhat of a casual thing that could have resulted in benefits for both of us down the line.

 

[Lookatu]

Lmao, that was exactly my conclusion too. She sabotaged herself bc by being with me, we could have still had a great time. Plus she could have gotten more connections herself. This could have developed into somewhat of a casual thing that could have resulted in more down the line. And by more, I mean we could have did things together and used each other to create a better social circle which could have resulted in her meeting other guys and vice versa...

Or you guys could've gotten serious and one of you could've moved to be closer to the other. Who knows? It's hard to say. We all think we know what we want but the truth is life throws a lot of curve balls at you.

But the point is everyone starts off casual regardless if they want to admit it or see it that way or not. Through getting to know someone over time is when both decide to take it to the next level and move forward or not. A lot of people like to idealize and daydream their situation to something down the line before taking the necessary beginning steps to get there. These people often put the cart before the horse as they say.

 

[SpartanWarrior77]

Or you guys could've gotten serious and one of you could've moved to be closer to the other. Who knows? It's hard to say. We all think we know what we want but the truth is life throws a lot of curve balls at you.

But the point is everyone starts off casual regardless if they want to admit it or see it that way or not. Through getting to know someone over time is when both decide to take it to the next level and move forward or not. A lot of people like to idealize and daydream their situation to something down the line before taking the necessary beginning steps to get there. These people often put the cart before the horse as they say.

Exactly. I wish I told her that but now it's too late. She's already flying back home. I should have said "Listen, we only met two times and I am not ready to talk about anything regarding relationships at the moment." I should have gotten her to just relax and focus more on the moment... Fvvvvvck, such a good opportunity missed. Expensive lesson learned. Ughh

 

[bat soup]

Throughout the day, she proceeded to tell me what a dishonest, selfish, cruel and nasty person she is:

"If they were obviously drunk, I would tell the clerk to charge them for 5 songs instead of 2 and they would pay it!"
[she's a thief]
"I wouldn't waste time on guys that were broke. I learned to quickly identify the cheap ones and the ones that had the money."
[she's a gold digger]
"One older guy let me live in his vacation house rent-free for a year (she was asked to house-watch) without me having to do any sexual favors."
[she took advantage of men that were kind to her]
"There is this older guy that just buys me stuff whenever I want."
[she uses people]
She even told me a story about how her stripper-friend was dating a guy who didn't know she was a stripper. The guy was rich and would buy her all kinds of stuff right in the beginning of their dating (phones, expensive dinners, etc). She said the guy heard that she was a stripper from someone else and both of them "played like perfect actors" and denied the whole thing.
[her friends are also scumbags]

And then she told me she wanted a relationship.

"I dreamed about you several times and knew I would see you again."
"It's so hard to find looove these days." [when you're a thieving, lying, nasty used-up stripper that's f##cked over everyone that's ever treated you kindly]
etc

 

[SpartanWarrior77]

Lmao - the game is not a pretty place. That is why they say "all is fair in love and war".

 

[speed dawg]

To sum it up, you entered her frame. Instead of keeping it fun, you engaged in all that 'poor me' talk and became her tampon. I really hope you didn't buy that nonsense about her living for free in some guy's home, legit LOL. I'm glad you got some ass out of it. Always remember, this b*tches don't think f*cking is anything special....at all.

Let's not act like this was some alpha victory, you were trying to take this girl home to your parents.

 

[bat soup]

Lmao - the game is not a pretty place. That is why they say "all is fair in love and war".

"A whoare's life is five good years, five bad years, and then some half-diqk sweat stain grinds you out like a cigarette. Like a goddamn spent cigarette. "

She's had her 5 good years and now she wants a sponsor because time is running out...

 

[Serenity]

When she called me out for it, I told her the truth so I think I acted within reason.

You did, that's fair enough, you didn't lie explicitly and continue the deception when confronted.

From what I could gather you knew she was hoping for more, it's at that point the deception starts. It's at that point I would explicitly state my intention before she feels even more invested and become more hurt when she inevitably figures out the truth. That is the way it will end anyways, it's just a matter of time and the more time that passes, the worse it feels for the other person. You are of course free to be responsible for inflicting emotional pain upon others, but I prefer not to do to others what I don't want them to do to me (even if they try doing that anyways).

In principle it's the same as watching someone die when you clearly could have taken action to save them and justify it by saying someone else does it too, it's still murder. It's an extreme example, I know, but that's the principle you're operating on in a less severe form. You could have spared her additional pain, but chose inaction instead. Sorry, but I won't support actions (or lack of) that knowingly harm others physically or emotionally, especially when it's totally unnecessary.

 

[SpartanWarrior77]

To sum it up, you entered her frame. Instead of keeping it fun, you engaged in all that 'poor me' talk and became her tampon. I really hope you didn't buy that nonsense about her living for free in some guy's home, legit LOL. I'm glad you got some ass out of it. Always remember, this b*tches don't think f*cking is anything special....at all.

Let's not act like this was some alpha victory, you were trying to take this girl home to your parents.

Harsh critique bud. Yeah, I think I messed up the frame a bit. I should have kept it more in the moment.

 

[SpartanWarrior77]

You did, that's fair enough, you didn't lie explicitly and continue the deception when confronted.

From what I could gather you knew she was hoping for more, it's at that point the deception starts. It's at that point I would explicitly state my intention before she feels even more invested and become more hurt when she inevitably figures out the truth. That is the way it will end anyways, it's just a matter of time and the more time that passes, the worse it feels for the other person. You are of course free to be responsible for inflicting emotional pain upon others, but I prefer not to do to others what I don't want them to do to me (even if they try doing that anyways).

In principle it's the same as watching someone die when you clearly could have taken action to save them and justify it by saying someone else does it too, it's still murder. It's an extreme example, I know, but that's the principle you're operating on in a less severe form. You could have spared her additional pain, but chose inaction instead. Sorry, but I won't support actions (or lack of) that knowingly harm others physically or emotionally, especially when it's totally unnecessary.

That's a fair critique. The main part being about how I had a feeling she wanted more which is true. However, 95% of the girls in my life wanted more but in my opinion, it's not good to bring things up overtly especially in the beginning. This idea that everything has to be known from day #1 is very business like and unnecessary. If she thinks she has a chance, let her bring on her A game and let us enjoy the process in the meanwhile. I think the other posters were right about just keeping the frame centered on the moment. Not putting the cart before the horse so to speak. Plus I made it covertly known that I wasn't trying to be exclusive. I mentioned how I had thoughts of moving abroad, I'm still trying to figure my life out, etc. I just didn't want to kill the vibe by saying "Just so you know, this isn't going anywhere" right from the get go. I think you have the same mentality I used to have which is that one must "announce the vision" so to speak right from the beginning. But I don't think that this is some necessary moral principle but rather a style of communication and a pretty ineffective one too for that matter.

 

[Serenity]

However, 95% of the girls in my life wanted more but in my opinion, it's not good to bring things up overtly especially in the beginning.

Not good in what way? Not good in the sense she won't play along anymore because she's in it for a different reason than yourself? Are you telling me only 5% of women would be comfortable with a casual/fwb situation? Doesn't seem to line up with the promiscuity of women so extensively spoken about on this forum. Why would a woman who is in the game for the exact same thing as you decline on exactly the type of deal she wants?

This idea that everything has to be known from day #1 is very business like and unnecessary.

I wouldn't mind casually mentioning "I'm not looking for anything serious" or "I'm just looking for fun", if that causes a hang-up in her then you know it doesn't align with what she seeks. If she's unbothered by it then you can assume she's fine with that type of thing, you can never be sure but at least then it's her responsibility for ending up hurt if she chose to conceal her true intention of something more.

Many people don't explicitly state their desire to have a relationship, because that's "business like" and often to much to think about too early. So it is often assumed in dating that it is to explore a potential relationship. I agree in this case to not be explicit until "the talk" happens. Because of this I think it's appropriate to be explicit about NOT being in the dating market for a potential relationship, to avoid wasting everyones time, contribute to a less chaotic dating market, less hurt feelings and perhaps even find better and more drama free casual relationships.

Plus I made it covertly known that I wasn't trying to be exclusive. I mentioned how I had thoughts of moving abroad, I'm still trying to figure my life out, etc.

Clearly she didn't get the message, infatuation doesn't just make men blind. She will rationalize all of that away and still think she has a chance to get in a relationship with you. If she's blinded enough you could even straight up tell her there's no chance in hell you'd enter a relationship, and she still would stick around in the hope you'll change your mind. Infatuation is a hell of a drug.

I just didn't want to kill the vibe by saying "Just so you know, this isn't going anywhere" right from the get go.

That's a poor way to formulate it, casually saying "I just want to have fun" is usually a good way to get the message across without killing the vibe (that is if she also just want nothing more than some fun).

But I don't think that this is some necessary moral principle but rather a style of communication and a pretty ineffective one too for that matter.

How effective was your communication towards this girl before she called you out? Not much at all if you ask me.

 

[Bigpapa]

Women are amoral but only when it comes to male morality

 

[jimwho]

Ok, So you had great sex, then woke her up in the middle of the night for a BJ?.. Wish I could've heard that
Convo.. Sweety wake up wake up nudge nudge. (her, what what is everything ok? (you, ya um I want a blojob.
You want a what?? A corndog? No a blojob. (her , what time is it? Wipes her eyes. (you, it's three.

That's a new one on me. We'll call it the dazed & confused BJ, so she wakes up with no memory of it..

 

[Çharismo]

Look man...there is no “lol” or “lmao” in dealing with strippers because they are dangerous individuals. Most of them were sexually abused at a young age, have crazy ex boyfriends, are involved in drugs and are basically prostitutes for anyone that has money. A lot of women think that it’s a “sexy” profession which is hardly true. It’s a dirty job but someone’s gotta do it.

You are no different. Just another notch under her belt. There is nothing alpha in having sex with a stripper. What I find perplexing is to why you need to spend New Years with her and bring her around your family? She was giving you an insight into her life when she told you about all the other guys that she has “hustled” and don’t be surprised that she has banged most of them.

Strippers are the lowest class of women you could deal with. They are basically equivalent to porn stars except that they are not having sex on camera. I believe deep down inside you know the truth about this situation and how you need to raise your standards but seem like you need some confirmation and validation about what you did.

Beware and don’t involve yourself with any strippers again. You can do better.

 

[Bigpapa]

Look man...there is no “lol” or “lmao” in dealing with strippers because they are dangerous individuals. Most of them were sexually abused at a young age, have crazy ex boyfriends, are involved in drugs and are basically prostitutes for anyone that has money. A lot of women think that it’s a “sexy” profession which is hardly true. It’s a dirty job but someone’s gotta do it.

You are no different. Just another notch under her belt. There is nothing alpha in having sex with a stripper. What I find perplexing is to why you need to spend New Years with her and bring her around your family? She was giving you an insight into her life when she told you about all the other guys that she has “hustled” and don’t be surprised that she has banged most of them.

Strippers are the lowest class of women you could deal with. They are basically equivalent to porn stars except that they are not having sex on camera. I believe deep down inside you know the truth about this situation and how you need to raise your standards but seem like you need some confirmation and validation about what you did.

Beware and don’t involve yourself with any strippers again. You can do better.

when everyone is paying and you are not , it means that you are quite a skilled seducer

 

[Çharismo]

when everyone is paying and you are not , it means that you are quite a skilled seducer

You obviously missed the point.