So how exactly do I approach in bars?

[Chimera]

So I just turned 21 about a month ago and recently started hitting up the bar scene, but I usually just end up hanging out with the friends I go there with instead of actually meeting new people. I have no trouble talking to people that I'm introduced to, but I I feel a bit weird about approaching complete strangers in a loud environment where they're usually busy talking to their own friends. I mean, my friends seem to have no trouble doing it, but I just don't get how to go about it without seeming creepy or awkward. Pleez halp!

 

[synergy1]

Most women are at bars to hang out with eachother. This makes it a problem if you want to pick one of them up and their friends aren't getting attention. There are ways around it, but I am hardly at the peak of getting a lay from a bar.

Have friends with you and genuinely enjoy your time out. Its better if you have some chick friends with you. When you are owning the night, look for girls in proximity to you and who make quick eye contact and look away. They are prime candidates to approach and chat with. I never remember half of what I say to them when I go up to them, but just strike up a conversation and keep it going. if they are cool with it you'll know it and you can progress from there. talk to their friends, impress them without bragging like a tool: this is so common from guys, even intelligent ones. Don't try and sell yourself explicitly, but rather let unspoken things do the talking.

If you are enjoying yourself, and don't seem like the type of guy who is trying real hard to impress a chick, you'll manage to do well. I have been know to walk away from groups as soon as they start to get cold. They usually come back.

 

[horaholic]

Its a social environment. Its ok to introduce yourself to people. Just say hi, you just turned 21, and want to meet everyone, then walk away. The next time you see them, you can small talk. Do this to mixed groups. Once you know peoples names, you can talk to them. Plus, if you go the a regular places, you will meet the regular crowd.

 

[Drewskie]

Just offer to buy girls a drink.

 

[Evzone]

Just offer to buy girls a drink.

I strongly disagree with that actually. They will talk to you--for a little while--but there are plenty of girls in bars who go out just to get guys to buy them free drinks. I have had female friends tell me that straight up. It's one thing to buy a drink for a girl that you've been talking to for a while, or a girl who you know already, but don't open a conversation with that.

 

[sebastian11]

Just offer to buy girls a drink.

this is the best way to go broke lol

 

[Captain]

I strongly disagree with that actually. They will talk to you--for a little while--but there are plenty of girls in bars who go out just to get guys to buy them free drinks. I have had female friends tell me that straight up. It's one thing to buy a drink for a girl that you've been talking to for a while, or a girl who you know already, but don't open a conversation with that.

I'm pretty sure he was joking.

I hope he was joking.

Make sure you engage the whole group if you approach, you don't want any of them getting bored and dragging their friends away from you.

 

[ENIGMA16]

"Hi, I'm JLay87."

Say that then go into whatever random thing pops into your head. That's what I usually do. Play crash and burn with your friends or something if you're really that scared of doing it.

 

[Drewskie]

I'm pretty sure he was joking.

I hope he was joking.

Make sure you engage the whole group if you approach, you don't want any of them getting bored and dragging their friends away from you.

'Course I was joking.

 

[Tom Stall]

Jlay87 is right, who cares what happens when you apporach and get knowcked back, do it again another night, see what happens its all good fun

dont offer drinks first up i think too

i think the best palce to apporach girls is at a bar, its hard to do in clubs because they can't hear a word your saying

what me and my mate did once, was that there was a hot girl leaving her friends to have a smoke, we would flip a coin, see who approaches, and the non-approacher would tell the approacher what to say

works most of the time, in the example above we got the girl to come over, and got her number