stevezissou
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- Joined
- Jul 29, 2005
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i spent six weeks this summer in my home town, working and partying with old friends. ran into the woman who used to be "the one" to me: she's married and we had an affair three years ago. we still have all the same friends (except i've moved away).
anyhow long story short: i was indifferent about seeing her, but i acted very nice and respectful. she makes a very subtle play to **** me (created a pretext for isolating me), i missed it. then she completely stopped talking to me and left town. while she was away, i mentioned something to a friend of hers about how the married woman seemed to want me. then i pulled myself together, called her told her to have drinks with me. we chatted, everything was fine (my goal was get our friendly rapport back so that things wouldn't be so tense when we're hanging out in a group). Next day she found out that i had said something to her friend. She *****ed me out and got me to apologize (for casting suspicion on her. remember she's married).
So, i very almost had the friendship and validation that i wanted, but now it's ruined.
The real problem is: i don't feel "alpha" anymore. The vibe that I gave off before is just gone and I don't know what to do to get it back. I feel guilty about what I did, and I also mourn the loss of this friend and former lover. It seems like it finally is over. How can I get my alpha juice back? I can barely look any woman in the eye right now. Just a couple of weeks ago, I felt like every woman wanted me.
Any ideas?
sz
anyhow long story short: i was indifferent about seeing her, but i acted very nice and respectful. she makes a very subtle play to **** me (created a pretext for isolating me), i missed it. then she completely stopped talking to me and left town. while she was away, i mentioned something to a friend of hers about how the married woman seemed to want me. then i pulled myself together, called her told her to have drinks with me. we chatted, everything was fine (my goal was get our friendly rapport back so that things wouldn't be so tense when we're hanging out in a group). Next day she found out that i had said something to her friend. She *****ed me out and got me to apologize (for casting suspicion on her. remember she's married).
So, i very almost had the friendship and validation that i wanted, but now it's ruined.
The real problem is: i don't feel "alpha" anymore. The vibe that I gave off before is just gone and I don't know what to do to get it back. I feel guilty about what I did, and I also mourn the loss of this friend and former lover. It seems like it finally is over. How can I get my alpha juice back? I can barely look any woman in the eye right now. Just a couple of weeks ago, I felt like every woman wanted me.
Any ideas?
sz