Should the game we play change if she knows you like her and vice versa?

[That_guy]

Though things are going great between me and this girl (note: I didnt get any, all we did was makeout and stuff and agree that we will keep seeing each other again) and usually she is the first to contact me. In any case, last Sunday she did not contact me until I contacted her and thats the last we spoke....she didnt text or call, or anything. She knows I have a busy schedule and I think she does too. However these are the thoughts in my head:

-She must think I dont care that much and will therefore put me in the friend zone
-She must be getting hit on by someone else and she likes it, because I dont give her attention, this new guy will bag her
-Someone must have said some bullcrap about me, so now she dont like me anymore
-Maybe she talked to her mom/sister/whoever and did not approve of me for whatever reason
-Last Saturday I ran into her OMW home (she dorms and my house is like 2 miles away from the University) I am now thinking she is checking me out....financially, and she didnt like it.
-I screwed up and now she dont want to see me anymore.


How does one remove these thoughts in his head?

Its more complicated now that we confessed to each other, and now I dont know how to act. And I am afraid sh**less

 

[st_99]

And I am afraid sh**less

thats all i needed to read, nothing repels girls more than a spineless poor sap thats afraid of losing the snatch (or potential snatch).

 

[That_guy]

thats all i needed to read, nothing repels girls more than a spineless poor sap thats afraid of losing the snatch (or potential snatch).

what do I do then?

 

[Htienvu]

First of all stop telling her you like her, keep the game up even though you know she likes you. Make sure she invest more into it than you, don't need to keep giving her attention. However, when you're out give her the utmost attention, you do this by listening, nodding and holding eye contact.

Relax, you try not to over think things, keep playing the game to your style! Don't change it now that she says she likes you. The game works, it's up to the player if they win or lose.

 

[st_99]

what do I do then?

you need a serious overhaul in mindset, you should be approaching everything
from a take it or leave it attitude, you're the prize mentallity. Even if you aren't getting girls
just act like you're banging 20 girls right now, thats whats needed here.

 

[That_guy]

Keep 'em coming, guys! this is really helping me feel better and see clearer

 

[That_guy]

First of all stop telling her you like her, keep the game up even though you know she likes you. Make sure she invest more into it than you, don't need to keep giving her attention. However, when you're out give her the utmost attention, you do this by listening, nodding and holding eye contact.

Relax, you try not to over think things, keep playing the game to your style! Don't change it now that she says she likes you. The game works, it's up to the player if they win or lose.

We make out whenever we see each other and before we leave...like a greeting, should I refrain from such behavior?

And last sunday she told me that the flowers I bought her (I was sh**faced) was getting bad and that means there will be room for new ones.....should I buy her damn flowers?

 

[zekko]

And last sunday she told me that the flowers I bought her (I was sh**faced) was getting bad and that means there will be room for new ones.....should I buy her damn flowers?

She shouldn't take for granted that you're going to be buying her flowers all the time.
Only buy flowers as a reward to her for good behavior.
Since she seems to have cooled off since your last interaction, she has done nothing to deserve them.
Go back, show her you're a fun guy, and re-establish frame that you are a leader and a catch. But don't be try hard.

There will be some here who will tell you not to buy flowers at all, that it's too "nice guy". I'm not much for flowers myself, really. I've only bought flowers for my girlfriend once in eight years.

 

[Maximummax]

Haha....Don't buy flowers
You didn't even ****et her. She needs to invest in you ...don't forget that.

 

[That_guy]

She shouldn't take for granted that you're going to be buying her flowers all the time.
Only buy flowers as a reward to her for good behavior.
Since she seems to have cooled off since your last interaction, she has done nothing to deserve them.
Go back, show her you're a fun guy, and re-establish frame that you are a leader and a catch. But don't be try hard.

There will be some here who will tell you not to buy flowers at all, that it's too "nice guy". I'm not much for flowers myself, really. I've only bought flowers for my girlfriend once in eight years.

So.....visit her tomorrow? Call? Text? What?

Haha....Don't buy flowers
You didn't even ****et her. She needs to invest in you ...don't forget that.

Dude....we were actually on our way to her dorm when these guys are yelling out "flowers for 2 dollars!" roses too, and I thought "hell....I am about to get some! lets put icing on the cake and buy her the damn roses" so I did....but that act might have put me in the LTR category, you know, the make him wait category.....so yeah......never let your guard down....

 

[shizz702]

You should have never bought her flowers in the first place and cease buying her anything from here on out.

Reward her with hugs, kisses, and c0ck not flowers or gifts.

Don't overthink this sh1t and as stated you need to adjust your mindset. You will never be able to relax and be yourself if you are afraid to walk away. Unless you find a keeper and are established in a relationship you need to spin multiple plates so you if something goes wrong with one, you turn right back to the others on deck.

If seeing multiple women ain't your thing then at least be in the mindset that if it doesn't work out, you don't care and it's her loss not yours.

They come and they go.

For now though just don't get clingy or needy on her and let her initiate as much contact as possible. Don't tell her you like her anymore or any of that silliness, instead show it physically. Keep escalating the physical stuff or you will be friended.

 

[zekko]

So.....visit her tomorrow? Call? Text? What?

It sounds to me that you guys hardly ever see each other. It doesn't matter how you contact her, just set something up so you can get together. I know you're busy, but if you never see her, there's nothing there.

that act might have put me in the LTR category, you know, the make him wait category.....so yeah......never let your guard down

I've never understood all the moping about girls making you wait if they put you in the LTR category. I mean, if all you want is a one night stand, okay. But if a girl is interested in you enough to see you as a potential LTR, she WILL be giving it up to you. Maybe she'll be on her best behavior and make you wait a date or two, but are you so horny and impatient you can't wait a few days? I actually find that the more the girl sees me as a good prospect, the quicker she wants to sex.

 

[Jeffst1980]

However these are the thoughts in my head:

-She must think I dont care that much and will therefore put me in the friend zone
-She must be getting hit on by someone else and she likes it, because I dont give her attention, this new guy will bag her
-Someone must have said some bullcrap about me, so now she dont like me anymore
-Maybe she talked to her mom/sister/whoever and did not approve of me for whatever reason
-Last Saturday I ran into her OMW home (she dorms and my house is like 2 miles away from the University) I am now thinking she is checking me out....financially, and she didnt like it.
-I screwed up and now she dont want to see me anymore.

NO!!!

These aren't the things that damage interest level in a girl. Giving her excess attention, being clingy, and stressing over the "right thing to do" WILL.

If she isn't contacting you, back off. She'll come around; you just have to trust that she will chase you when you remove the source of validation. Your goal is to have HER invest the majority of effort into the relationship; otherwise, she'll lose interest.

Don't buy her flowers- especially if she asks for them. The minute you do, you will be in the same category with every other chump that tries too hard to please her.

 

[AlexLefty]

You're thinking waaayyy too much! Keep going after this girl but at the same time, take a few steps back and analyze your own head, you need to figure out how to become a natural at game, no one is going to tell you: step 1, step 2, step 2.5...What you need to do is invest more in your own mindset, and for the love of god stop stressing over her like this, stop worrying about the little things.

Even if you aren't getting girls just act like you're banging 20 girls right now, thats whats needed here.

Hell, fake it 'till you make it if you have to!