Should I call?

[Alpheta]

my relationship has been good so far until a week ago.

Before I get in to it, I know most of you will tell me I do not deserve her and that I had it coming. I know. I'm an ass. But hear me.

Just two days ago I was on the phone to her. I bullied her. I mean I normally do it but this was kinda harsh. For no reason too. By bullying I mean I made her feel insecure and not worthy. I wasn't even mad. I don't know, I got a thrill from it. when I said "I wana sleep" she said "we can't end the convo like this" she cried and I laughed it off. In the end she got mad and said cool, goodnight.

Since then I haven't heard from her. I NEVER initiate. It's been 2 full days.

As a guy who never initiates, should I call?

Do bear in mind that in the last week I cancelled on her too. She begged me but I said no.I didn't buy or wish her a happy birthday a few weeks back.

 

[sage'sproduct]

No.

The fact that you're wondering whether you should goes to show how much male guilt has been drilled into our heads by the media and other blue pill content. Despite whatever playful or slight banter you might have engaged in, you wanted to go to sleep, right?

I don't see this situation as worthy of rewarding her for making a fuss over. You say your relationship has been good so far. If your behavior suddenly changes now, won't that teach her a new way to get your attention/control you?

 

[Alpheta]

No.

The fact that you're wondering whether you should goes to show how much male guilt has been drilled into our heads by the media and other blue pill content. Despite whatever playful or slight banter you might have engaged in, you wanted to go to sleep, right?

I don't see this situation as worthy of rewarding her for making a fuss over. You say your relationship has been good so far. If your behavior suddenly changes now, won't that teach her a new way to get your attention/control you?

I'll tell you why I am in two minds.

She's always initiated and I've always played hard to get. I'm harsh. Always.

However, on her birthday I gave her nothing. infact SHE brought me a gift on her birthday lmao. This was 3 weeks back. I didn't wish her happy bday or acknowledge it. I could tell after her birthday it got to her. Nonetheless it was still cool.

A few days later, I picked on her. Telling her that I'm disappointed in her body and her whole outlook. This made her super conscious. She went on shopping sprees make up beautician etc told me that she will fix her self. We were supposed to meet up a few days after but I cancelled. I indirectly made it out like I didn't wana see her just because I wasn't attracted. She cried and told me why I'm punishing her.

The bizarre thing is after that day she changed up. Didn't call as much.

Then the other Day I just outright bullied her. It was mean and she cried but I showed no remorse.

I feel that maybe I pushed her buttons too much.

 

[Alpheta]

Bump

 

[El Payaso]

What do you mean by "bullying"? Be specific.

 

[Alpheta]

What do you mean by "bullying"? Be specific.

Pick on her flaws. Tell her she's worthless (indirectly) remind her she's not a good girl (as she broke her virginity with me and she's religious.) all this for no reason.

I feel bad. She kept saying "we can't end the convo like this" I kept brushing it and telling her I need to sleep and so she said "fine" which btw is the first time ever in our 2 year relationship.

I personally feel that my careless attitude to her bday (last year I brought her an xpensive necklace.) thereafter I cancelled our meet purely because I made it out like I don't WANT to see her, not because I'm busy. Now this.

 

[btownbuck2012]

my relationship has been good so far until a week ago.

Before I get in to it, I know most of you will tell me I do not deserve her and that I had it coming. I know. I'm an ass. But hear me.

Just two days ago I was on the phone to her. I bullied her. I mean I normally do it but this was kinda harsh. For no reason too. By bullying I mean I made her feel insecure and not worthy. I wasn't even mad. I don't know, I got a thrill from it. when I said "I wana sleep" she said "we can't end the convo like this" she cried and I laughed it off. In the end she got mad and said cool, goodnight.

Since then I haven't heard from her. I NEVER initiate. It's been 2 full days.

As a guy who never initiates, should I call?

Do bear in mind that in the last week I cancelled on her too. She begged me but I said no.I didn't buy or wish her a happy birthday a few weeks back.

The f*ck is wrong with you? There's being alpha and then there is a point where you are just asking her to run off and cheat on you by acting like this or outright dumping you all together. And from the looks of it, you like this girl enough to jump on here and make a post about her and ask for advice. How long have you been dating this girl? Don't act surprised when she reaches her breaking point (which she may have already) and completely fade you out for someone else...

 

[Alpheta]

The f*ck is wrong with you? There's being alpha and then there is a point where you are just asking her to run off and cheat on you by acting like this or outright dumping you all together. And from the looks of it, you like this girl enough to jump on here and make a post about her and ask for advice. How long have you been dating this girl? Don't act surprised when she reaches her breaking point (which she may have already) and completely fade you out for someone else...

Been 2 years.

I know I ****ed up.

 

[Konada]

Pick on her flaws. Tell her she's worthless (indirectly) remind her she's not a good girl (as she broke her virginity with me and she's religious.) all this for no reason.

I feel bad. She kept saying "we can't end the convo like this" I kept brushing it and telling her I need to sleep and so she said "fine" which btw is the first time ever in our 2 year relationship.

I personally feel that my careless attitude to her bday (last year I brought her an xpensive necklace.) thereafter I cancelled our meet purely because I made it out like I don't WANT to see her, not because I'm busy. Now this.

Has she done anything to deserve this kind of treatment? Seems like you went out of your way to be a total a$$ to her with saying crap like she's worthless/trashy girl for giving her virginity to you.

Ladies and gents, here you have a fine example of why women are fvcked up. Assh0les who punish women for good behavior.

Call her, apologize. Do it not for salvaging the relationship but because you are going to fvck up this girl for the rest of the guys down the road because of this.

 

[Alpheta]

Has she done anything to deserve this kind of treatment? Seems like you went out of your way to be a total a$$ to her with saying crap like she's worthless/trashy girl for giving her virginity to you.

Ladies and gents, here you have a fine example of why women are fvcked up. Assh0les who punish women for good behavior.

She Didn't do nothing wrong. I mean she brought me a gift on her bday. I brought nothing.

I just feel like it's worked the way I go about **** but I went too hard in the last week.

 

[El Payaso]

Don't call. If you start apologizing now, your frame will start to slip little by little. You've already gone all the way to the other end of the spectrum. Might as well stay there. She's young. She'll eventually leave you anyway.

P.S. Keep your options open. Don't catch oneitis for her believing she's a "good" girl.

 

[xstang77]

I used to be somewhat like this and it got me the longest relationship I ever had 4 years. It puts you in control and in power but in the end it'll push away the girl that's down for you and you'll regret it when you see the light and end up alone. It is true what they say girls love *******s, you can try to fix It but even if you were the fix your ways towards her the damage is most likely already done.

 

[Alpheta]

Don't call. If you start apologizing now, your frame will start to slip little by little. You've already gone all the way to the other end of the spectrum. Might as well stay there. She's young. She'll eventually leave you anyway.

P.S. Keep your options open. Don't catch oneitis for her believing she's a "good" girl.

I don't intend to apologies literally but ask her what's up. I do call her from time to time but it's really rare.

I thought if I call her, I'll know where things stand. Leaving it like this and not hearing from her makes me feel like ****.

 

[El Payaso]

I don't intend to apologies literally but ask her what's up. I do call her from time to time but it's really rare.

I thought if I call her, I'll know where things stand. Leaving it like this and not hearing from her makes me feel like ****.

Don't ask her what's up. You're just begging for her to dictate the frame with a question like that.

Just go about as normal. Go out with her. Treat her a little more special.

If she brings it up, just say you were cranky because you were tired and needed to sleep. Don't dwell on it further with her. Change the subject.

 

[TheCuckSlayer]

^Agreed. OP, you clearly feel guilty. Just inconspicuously be a little nicer to her next time you see her. Don't reward bad behavior.

 

[El Payaso]

I should also add that if you don't want to find yourself in a situation like this in the future, don't "bully" her for no reason.

Only neg her when she negs you or her ego is getting too big.

A girl I was dating once told me, "You need to lose some weight".

I told her "You could lose some yourself too. I hear my bed creaking every time you get on it."

She gasped but she knew she couldn't get mad because of what she just said.

 

[Calum Tingham]

Call her—even better, buy her a little gift. (A muffin, a chocolate bar, a bottle of wine.)

Say it's because you forgot her birthday and you're sorry. Don't get into an argument about it, hug her, stroke her hair and move the conversation forward. Then treat her nicer because you don't want to damage this girl.

Now, with honesty,

It sounds like you're damaged and the girl you've attracted is, as predicted, just as damaged as you are.
You're a bully—and she's a sucker for abuse. That's a match made in sarcasm heaven.

My real advice is to sort out your own issues so you can attract secure women, and let the insecure one's heal, instead of making them worse.
So I pose this question to you: Why do you feel pleasure in bullying this poor girl?

Search deep,

C

 

[Alpheta]

So I called her.

I wish I read El Payasos quote before calling.

I called her. She seemed absolutely fine lmao. I had instant regret. So i got impulsive and asked her if she was okay as she hadnt called. She told me she wasnt planning on it as I was harsh the other day and was intending to call during the week as she knew i wouldnt call. She was surprised that I did. She even pointed out that shes impressed that her not talking has made me appreciate her lol. She went on and said how she feels I dont call her because of my ego. She even said that I always try one upping her and that by me calling her today I ifeel like I took a step down lmao.

I mean at least she was honest.

I explained everything to her told her Its not like i didnt care etc etc. but by the time I got to the end of the conversation, I felt like I phucked up. Therefore, in the end i told her that I want this relationship to work so in order to get rid of this patch we should go NC for 3 weeks. She wasnt happy with it but accepted (ive done this before) as its not alien to her.

I feel like I took a huge L but whatever man. At least I get to fix my **** up in this period.

 

[daddymonsterpoodle]

It sound to me like you were being an outright PR#CK to her and she finally said enough of this.

I wouldn't hold your breath on hearing from her.

Yup. Alpha/Dominant/Leader in the relationship doesn't mean be a douche. She obviously had self esteem issues to it up with it for so long. Even if she is a natural sub there should be more discussion or respect.

The hell do I know. If that is the kind of person you are and she puts up with it then you both get what you deserve.

It does sound like you have discovered you have power in the relationship and are abusing it.

 

[Alpheta]

Based on your old posts you're not being honest. You're probably butthurt about something she did but you can't let go so you just act passive aggressive.

She really hasnt done anything.

Im very demanding so If I don't get the response I want, I force it by either being really harsh or bullying.