NewDestiny47
Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 14, 2006
- Messages
- 43
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My g/f of sometime and I recently broke up, kind of mutually. I always blamed it on the fact that she had a lot of jealousy issues, and that I just got tired of it.
When I really think about it though, I think I had a LOT to do with it.
See, several months into the relationship I started to develop very bad anxiety/panic disorder. What started to happen was that I would constantly cancel on her... it got to the point where id see her maybe once every two months or so. Everyday she'd ask me to go with her to lunch etc. and id always make up some stupid excuse, b/c my panic attacks would start kicking in. It got to the point where she wouldn't even ask anymore, she'd just say "what excuse do you have today?? your stomach hurts??? your head hurts??"
When I think of it this way... is it any wonder she was jealous? I turned her down like 50+ times, one time I even cancelled ten minutes before a date when her whole family was there, made her look like a total fool.
She still contacts me, she's rather flirty with me. It seems that there's still interest on her part, though we're in a bad situation no doubt.
Guys, is it time to swallow my pride and tell her what was going on with me that whole time? I haven't told ANYONE about my anxiety except my doctor, i HATE admitting weakness to anyone.
Truth is I really liked this woman and I feel like a lot of this crap was b/c of me.... this goes against my instinct but should I just drop the macho act and write her a letter explaining my problem, why I cancelled so much etc. and apologize for it?
I don't know what would come of it....but I guess it's not like things could get worse than they already are. If I do write her a letter, should I ask for another chance... or just explain what happened and what im doing to get better?
When I really think about it though, I think I had a LOT to do with it.
See, several months into the relationship I started to develop very bad anxiety/panic disorder. What started to happen was that I would constantly cancel on her... it got to the point where id see her maybe once every two months or so. Everyday she'd ask me to go with her to lunch etc. and id always make up some stupid excuse, b/c my panic attacks would start kicking in. It got to the point where she wouldn't even ask anymore, she'd just say "what excuse do you have today?? your stomach hurts??? your head hurts??"
When I think of it this way... is it any wonder she was jealous? I turned her down like 50+ times, one time I even cancelled ten minutes before a date when her whole family was there, made her look like a total fool.
She still contacts me, she's rather flirty with me. It seems that there's still interest on her part, though we're in a bad situation no doubt.
Guys, is it time to swallow my pride and tell her what was going on with me that whole time? I haven't told ANYONE about my anxiety except my doctor, i HATE admitting weakness to anyone.
Truth is I really liked this woman and I feel like a lot of this crap was b/c of me.... this goes against my instinct but should I just drop the macho act and write her a letter explaining my problem, why I cancelled so much etc. and apologize for it?
I don't know what would come of it....but I guess it's not like things could get worse than they already are. If I do write her a letter, should I ask for another chance... or just explain what happened and what im doing to get better?