She talks about her ex and still talks to him

[wonderer]

a plate of mine talks about her ex now and then. Not about him specifically but about experiences. e.g "did you know stroking a babies nose helps them fall asleep? My ex used to do it to me"

Me talking about seeing a girl who does geography. "My ex did geography their generally a bit thick"

"my ex never used to take me on dates"

and so on.

I know that they've been spending some time together and talking too.

Pook says in ******** if she ever talks about her ex - she still loves him.

Is this always the case? So many girls i know have spoken about their ex but have had strong negative feelings about them. Is context important?

What do we think?

 

[Mr. Cappucino]

Kid, she still talks to him, so obviously she's still got something going on.

i have a best friends who won't stop talking about her boyfriend.


She's always with him!!!


ALWAYS!!!!!. i realized later on that she was a lost cause

i didnt like her though, but my other companion did, and although he did not act like a nice guy, even he couldn't get her. so she was a lost cause.:yes:

 

[RedScorpion]

Yes, it's a very bad sign. May have nothing to do with you at all. It just seems like she has not let go of her ex. Further, she is being blatantly disrespect to you bringing him up (only exception I can think of is of abuse), but it's highly inappropriate. And she's still hanging out with him!

If a girl is bringing up a certain guy often, then that means she's thinking of him that much more. Worse, it's failing her restrictions of not wanting to talk about them, especially to a supposed interest. If she is over someone, she wouldn't bring them up. He's still number one in her mind.

For the foreseeable future, I think she should be treated as nothing more than a plate to have fun with here and there.

 

[wonderer]

Ever think it could be used to make you jealous?

Remembered another time she brought him up "I cant give massages, my ex had to train me! haha".

 

[Dgwizdal]

Bad sign - She's not over him. She may hate his guts, they may have a had a terrible breakup, but chances are that He did NOT go out like an AFC as expected and she still has unresolved issues about the breakup or relationship. Remember: emotions (good or bad) are hamster food for women. If she were indifferent, she would very rarely mention him outside of necessity.

Doesn't necessarily mean it is a direct threat to you but know that those comments come from a place far from innocence. Laugh it off and carry on. She is a plate and not a girlfriend.

Nuke her hamster by talking about a time, thing, vacation or trip you and one of your ex's went on and see how she reacts. Do this a few times until she blows up, play aloof and remind her that when she talks about whatshisface that you could give a fvck about it. She will see that you are apparently unfazed by said possible sh!t test and gina tingles will follow.

If you see an increase of name-dropping frequency after that, then you have grounds of being disrespected and nexting her.

 

[EbbsAndFlows]

Yeah, I'm not going to say it's absolutely a bad sign, per se. It's annoying, for sure. I've caught myself mentioning an ex to a girl I was starting to see, and I was very over that ex.

How about though: I was dating a girl for about 6 months when I went to her parent's house to meet them, have dinner, etc. Their family had a photo collage with each of the siblings and their respective significant others. Here I am sitting this chick's house, shooting the **** with her dad, drinking a beer, and there's a picture of her and her boyfriend of 5 years just chilling there on the wall right in front of me. Made me feel really eery.

It was like her parents were stuck on the ex, or maybe she wanted it there too. Who knows. She always said they were still friends, hung out in the same crowd, etc. I just never let it bother me and I was the one staying with her 3-4 nights week, gettin it in. Was still off-putting though.

 

[nismo-4]

The ex is better than you. Drop her ass.

Case closed.

 

[JohnChops]

The ex is better than you. Drop her ass.

Case closed.

Damn Nismo, pulling the trigger a bit early? My girlfriend, out of the almost year I've been dating her, she's only mentioned her ex about 3 times and about some horrible crap. But if she's bringing it up often, more than once a week then eh, I'd pull back on her as well

 

[wonderer]

The ex is better than you. Drop her ass.

Case closed.

I'm seeing her a lot more than him, getting with her more than him. Shes mentioned him now and then and seen him once as far as I know. My game is superior to his. I'll end him bro.

Whilst getting with other girls of course

 

[JohnChops]

I'm seeing her a lot more than him, getting with her more than him. Shes mentioned him now and then and seen him once as far as I know. My game is superior to his. I'll end him bro.

Whilst getting with other girls of course

Being arrogant and ****y gets you no where.

 

[Cerwin Vega]

I'm seeing her a lot more than him, getting with her more than him. Shes mentioned him now and then and seen him once as far as I know. My game is superior to his. I'll end him bro.

Whilst getting with other girls of course

So why do you even care?

 

[wonderer]

Would it be a bad move to talk to her about it? Or just act aloof?

Shes coming down to see me and a good friend of ours who's bringing her bf. Thing is this the bf is her ex's best mate.

Should I just say I dont think its a good idea? Pretend I cant make it? confront the situation?

It'l get back to him and who knows what could happen between them after that.

 

[Kailex]

What do I think?

I think it doesn't matter as long as you honestly don't care and she isn't a priority in your life (Example: She's Plate C in my rotation of 4 plates).

But the fact that this thread exists means that:

(A) You actually do care about her and it's bothering you
(B) You need to learn how to deflect the conversation and change the subject in a subtle form

Usually women who will talk about their ex like this are in "Rebound" mode. Yes, you might see her more than him, but that could strictly be temporary. There is ALWAYS a chance that she could go straight back to him, no matter what you believe the circumstances to be. As long as she is talking about him... she is thinking about him.

Are you prepared to deal with that? Are you prepared to just walk away at any moments notice? Or are you trying to make her into a girlfriend?

Analyze this, because a thread like this usually highlights imminent danger.

 

[wonderer]

What do I think?

I think it doesn't matter as long as you honestly don't care and she isn't a priority in your life (Example: She's Plate C in my rotation of 4 plates).

But the fact that this thread exists means that:

(A) You actually do care about her and it's bothering you
(B) You need to learn how to deflect the conversation and change the subject in a subtle form

Usually women who will talk about their ex like this are in "Rebound" mode. Yes, you might see her more than him, but that could strictly be temporary. There is ALWAYS a chance that she could go straight back to him, no matter what you believe the circumstances to be. As long as she is talking about him... she is thinking about him.

Are you prepared to deal with that? Are you prepared to just walk away at any moments notice? Or are you trying to make her into a girlfriend?

Analyze this, because a thread like this usually highlights imminent danger.

Thank you for this. Really some sound advice. Do you have an opinion on what I should do about the double date situation?

 

[VladPatton]

Why she brings him up often and still talks to him is not your problem to analyze, all you can do is react accordingly to the quality of time she is giving you, which doesn't seem to be that great. She is not respecting it enough to keep her trap shut about another guy, WTF??

Put this chick on the back burner ASAP, and let her hamster spin itself into oblivion. Get something better.

 

[DonGorgon]

lol wether its her X or some there dude, 99% of women entertain the advances of other men while in relationships... it comes down to looks and situation how far it goes..

 

[Alvafe]

Thank you for this. Really some sound advice. Do you have an opinion on what I should do about the double date situation?

inconsistence

if your game is so damn superior why you are asking our opnion? thing is she is not over her ex, at most you are her rebound, but hey since you don't value your time and want to spend on low class woman go ahead, Nizmo said everything you should know

 

[Don-Kong]

Boundaries.

I've stopped a wench dead in her tracks whilst she mentions the ex you just do it slick. Moving into deep rapport and shared reality...time evaporates...

"This moment right now, is where you are free, with this charming gentleman (myself) in this beautiful place. Let's be in the moment. The past no longer exists. Here, right now is where life is at. Do you want to live and be free because I do. I won't be shackled by memories anymore. Let's enjoy each other, here, have some champagne" or something to that effect.

It sounds really cheesy, but said with utter confidence, it fvcking works. I've used it several times, they never mention the ex again! They actually like the bluntness and balls of it. It's a reality check, a wake up. It says, I'm alive and enjoying my life, if you can't then see ya! If you are so lame as to not understand your mind or what you are wasting time thinking about what is over then that is your hell and you can rot in it. I'll have no part in it.

We choose to let them keep doing this, draw the line. If it's not what you want to hear then make it known.

 

[wonderer]

thing is she is not over her ex, at most you are her rebound, but hey since you don't value your time and want to spend on low class woman go ahead, Nizmo said everything you should know

She broke up with him a year ago and they started speaking recently. Is that a rebound?

 

[Jaylan]

She is a plate. Deal with it. What do you expect from a girl that you merely see as a plate? Lets be real here OP. I agree that she still has feeling for her ex. But if shes just a plate, youre not in a place to tell her who she can and cant talk to. Youll lose this one buddy.