She is not sure about me.

[summersky]

Hi everyone,

Met this girl and we got along really well on the first date. the day after she texts me that she only wants to have a friendship. I said im not interested then she comes back again. Things seem to develop really nice, she starts to get more affectionate. Date 2 - first kiss.

Then on the third date she was acting a little weird. She felt uncomfortable when I touched her but as soon as i stopped she was touching me herself. I did all i could to get more intimate but she blocked many times. I dont know maybe she was on her period also. One time she was talking as she is really into me, another time she started to talk about having a friendship again. Things like she is living too far away and things would be complicated (all bullsh*t like that). I told her that I dont like her behaviour and Im only dealing with women that really want me. Her behaviour is killing the vibe. After that she was really touchy again, kissing me many times, looked me deep in the eyes for a few minutes and looked really said as the date came to an end.

So I was really feeling uncomfortable about her behaviour. Her talking about being friends and stuff like that. Few minutes after she went home she wrote me that she really enjoyed spending time with me. I responded by saying that I didnt like her wishy washy behaviour and I dont feel appreciated as a man, so I dont think this will work out. She told me that she doesnt know what she wants and I said "no problem, other mothers got beautyful daughters too!" She responded with a sad smiley. Thats it.

I like her but I dont like her behaviour. Its ok to take it slow but what she is doing is being wishy washy and making me look bad. I kind of wondering if I was a little too harsh on her or if I pushed too much. Or was it right to put her in her place? What do you think and how would you have handeled the situation? Should I offer another date if she will reach out to me? Or how should I behave to make her want me?

 

[summersky]

Hey men, come on! Nobody wanna write something?

 

[Desdinova]

Women who are a pain in the ass to deal with are not worth the time. A woman who wants to fvck you and be with you won't string you along and then turn you down.

You shot the dog for a good reason. Don't bother trying to save it. Get a new dog.

 

[summersky]

Thank you,
She told that she is unsure after i asked and her actions telling me something different. I know she isnt relationship material. So i just wanna go for the lay.. So what would be the best way to behave and make it happen in my Situation?

 

[Prime_Beef]

Another rooster(s) visiting the hen house and she was comparison shopping on your date. For whatever reason you didn't measure up enough for her to jump off the Lillipad. Could be she has a man.

If you want the lay you need to step back, play it cool from that angle.

 

[Glassguy]

"I like her but I dont like her behavior".

Attention is a woman's reward for good behavior. You are obviously not fvcking her, so what is she doing to benefit you that she should have any of your attention?

Back off this chick. If she asks why, tell her that you're not interested in "friends only" or a pen pal.

The end.

 

[summersky]

Thank you all,

@PrimeBeef: What do you mean by step back and playing it cool?

Dont want to fix anything at all, just wanna lay her if possible but guess there is no big chance? You know the feeling you put your energy in a woman and no lay comes out of it.

So im just asking for advice for how to proceed to get a lay out of it?

 

[resilient]

@summersky... it sounds like you were escalating without enough comfort (and attraction) building. Don't go straight for her tail if she isn't reciprocating kino.

Tease her, bust on her, get her emotions going. Flirt be silly have fun. If she's giving hot/cold signals, she's not ramped up enough in invest further in interest level/comfort/attraction.

There could be other guys or a main dude in her picture that is already hitting all the right notes, so she'll continue to give you mixed signals and a weak connection if that's the case.

Finally, read Desdinova's High Score Theory thread if you haven't read that yet. It will help you understand what you're competing with.

Whenever a girl is ever "not sure" about you, that almost always translates to low interest level. The ego doesn't want to accept that, yet it's the truth.

 

[Serenity]

Last time a woman went like that with me I ended up going complete ghost. She was very weird. Fvcked her on the first date, told me she wanted to be friends the next day. Apparently I was just not aggressive enough, which was true though as I had not had sex for 4 years and was massively insecure about how to handle women. However I had learned not to be an AFC, so I straight up told her friendship is not gonna happen. Either it's more or I don't give a sh!t.

Took a few days before she took a 180 and suddenly she was super interested. She came over and we fvcked again, I was a bit more aggressive in my approach this time. She turned out to keep lots of secrets though, was deliberately hiding her phone from my view. Asked me to drive her to "some friends" which I did, obviously lied about a couple of other stuff.

I only took a couple of days of her bullsh!t. She was at my place, but she was going to "some friend" again. She noticed I was annoyed, which I was. I asked her if she remembered everything, didn't want her coming back under the excuse she forgot something. She said yes, got in my car and had a short trip with suffocating tension. I did that on purpose. I dropped her off, she said "see ya later" and I just looked at her stupid before closing my car door and driving away.

Deleted her from everything and never saw or spoke to her again. A female friend of mine knew who she was and later told me this girl was fvcked up, I just responded "I noticed".

 

[summersky]

Thanks everyone!

@Grewd: How funny, this one also hid her phone from me on every date..

Sadly I made the mistake by contacting and telling her that I didnt want to put her under pressure and things should evolve (or not evolve) naturally. That I am not sure about my feelings too.

Then we started writing and I offered a date, but she said she is too busy with work, but counteroffered me to visit me at the hospital. (Will be at the hospital in a few days, for a few days). I said no problem and said nothing about her offer to visit. Then light flirting and thats it. Two days passed, heard nothing from her, what is not common. Guess this story is done?

 

[Serenity]

@summersky Yeah, I think this story is over and if not I think you should end the story.

If this girl makes you feel uncomfortable I cannot see why you'd want it to continue. Hiding their phone so deliberately isn't a good sign either, makes you wonder what and why she don't want you to see. In my case it was very probably a bunch of other men she was fvcking. I wouldn't bother much about that if she just didn't try so hard hiding it.

Just a little fun story about what happened after the weird secretive girl I dated. A couple of days after I went ghost on her I met another girl. The contrast was huge, this new girl was very open about everything. She did the complete opposite with her phone, instead of deliberately hiding the screen she was always holding it so I'd see everything. She said nothing about it, but I could see she deliberately tilted the screen for me to see. Even showed off a few orbiters sending texts and complaining about some idiot trying to call her all the time. I certainly felt a lot more comfortable with her as well, she just wasn't socially awkward in any way.