she didn't flake but still confused..??

[pete101]

ok like in my other thread i actually met up with this girl for a 2nd time tonight.. and she was all dressed up looking stunning but i felt almost as if we had nothing to say to each other so for the whole night in patches we were struggling for conversation.

we were only in the bar for 1 hour and she suddenly announces 'can u take me home?' she wants to go and gossip with her new flatmate than be out with me.. bad sign.

i said to her 'you seem bored' she then goes to say she promised her flatmate she was only going to be out for an hour.. screams of BS to me.. shes all dressed up looking amazing but seemed bored with nothing to say so wants to go home.

she tells me i'm sexy when we're in the car and try to kiss her both in the bar and when i dropped her off but she won't let me!! in the bar she goes 'no i won't let u.. not here' so i go 'oh so later then? '

i appreciate it's not the best time to do it cos it wasn't secluded but she wouldn't let me when i dropped her off.. she kept talking about 'discipline' i dont get her...

but i think i understand i found out she might have a bf hence no kissing but i dont bring up this issue cos it'll be like shooting myself in the foot.

what do i do now?

we made arrangements to meet up and hang out in the park this weekend (but nothing concrete) and for a romantic candle light dinner at her place next week.. but these are just empty promises.. i even made her promise to meet up this weekend as she got out the car, somehow i think that was a bad move?! it was cos i was running along the convo of how we didn't have that much time together tonight.

it's not a good sign at all that after one hour if she's all dressed up looking amazing that she annouces she wants to go home.. she's clearly bored and i've fluffed it. i just froze and couldn't think of C+F stuff to keep things going.

what do i do..? i made her promise to meet up this weekend.. but still why would she want to do that if shes bored in a bar with me.. i should have gone for an action date.. less talking less awkward silences.

should i have asked her why in the car why she wont let me kiss her??

 

[DonGorgon]

OK... make her come to you ... to you place... do something simple .. a movie pizza.. be easy and funny, flirt and tease her... Do not chase her you give too much power...

She was expecting alot from you and feels you did not deliver.. make her deliver to you...

 

[amoka]

If she feels the way I think she feels about you, she may "have other plans" when the time for you to meet her comes. I smell high to low interest level, unless she is some teenager, she may not go out with you anytime soon. Here is why: when you start craving for a kiss from her. Practically, begging her to give you a kiss. "'oh so later then?". You gave the ball to her to play right here.

My suggestion to you is to forget about lighting up candles at the park sh!t and call her and cancel the date. Tell her something happened and that you'll not be able to make it; however, you'd inform her once things are resolved. And stop contacting her for few weeks, maybe months. This is from personal experience, read Amoka Approach Journal.

Oh yeah, don't ever ask a girl if she will give you a kiss later!

 

[pete101]

OK... make her come to you ... to you place... do something simple .. a movie pizza.. be easy and funny, flirt and tease her... Do not chase her you give too much power...

She was expecting alot from you and feels you did not deliver.. make her deliver to you...

i live with my family so that's a no go.. i have to go to hers.

but if she left after an hour she clearly feels that there is no chemistry even tho there is physical attraction?

the awkward silences i could have filled but i froze.. i did some funny stuff during and between but it just isn't happening.

she rather be at home with her girls gossiping and she told me that she gets so excited by the gossiping but with me it's like she wants to be somewhere else. what am i doing wrong.. why wont she let me kiss her?

ok say she has a bf.. that explains everything but still her leaving after an hour isn't exactly going to improve my chances. i've failed here and have no idea how i could turn it around.

is texting her now while it's fresh in her mind 'i dont understand u.. if u think im sexy then kiss me!'

 

[pete101]

If she feels the way I think she feels about you, she may "have other plans" when the time for you to meet her comes. I smell high to low interest level, unless she is some teenager, she may not go out with you anytime soon. Here is why: when you start craving for a kiss from her. Practically, begging her to give you a kiss. "'oh so later then?". You gave the ball to her to play right here.

My suggestion to you is to forget about lighting up candles at the park sh!t and call her and cancel the date. Tell her something happened and that you'll not be able to make it; however, you'd inform her once things are resolved. And stop contacting her for few weeks, maybe months. This is from personal experience, read Amoka Approach Journal.

Oh yeah, don't ever ask a girl if she will give you a kiss later!

i see what u mean.. but when i go to arrange the date with her.. she 'promised' me that we'd have more time this weekend.. she's just a yes man.. says yes to everything but doesn't deliver.

i had a great opportunity to kiss close and i fluffed.. i think she was expecting it to but i didn't.. i should have been cheeky and did it.

but when i call her next she'll be dodging and ducking my calls so i won't be able to make arrangements to cancel anyway.. grrrr... i just froze in that bar.. i had so many things to say but i refrained and just let the silence take over..

is it pointless sending her a text now..? remember she might have a bf.. i was told by an outside source.. so that changes things completely?

 

[pete101]

i was going to send this now is it just pointless?

'i dont understand u, if u think im sexy then kiss me! our awkward silences would be better filled with kissing.. i appreciate it might not be the right time but u seem bored and rather spend your night gossiping than out with a stud like me . just for that you're not getting a kiss now . we're running out of things to say to each other so no more bar dates only actions 1s being active having fun.'

 

[ezily]

i was going to send this now is it just pointless?

'i dont understand u, if u think im sexy then kiss me! i appreciate it might not be the right time but u seem bored and rather spend your night gossiping than out with a stud like me . just for that you're not getting a kiss now . our awkward silences would be better filled with kissing.. we're running out of things to say to each other so no more bar dates only actions 1s being active having fun.'

did you even read any advice from before?

DO NOT SEND THAT STUPID TEXT. I'm telling you that if you do you're doomed. Just cancel the date i.e. flake on her. Don't contact her for a while and then try again. Jeez man you need to become more patient. Stop trying to rush everything.

 

[pete101]

did you even read any advice from before?

DO NOT SEND THAT STUPID TEXT. I'm telling you that if you do you're doomed. Just cancel the date i.e. flake on her. Don't contact her for a while and then try again. Jeez man you need to become more patient. Stop trying to rush everything.

there is no date arranged yet.. it's all speculative..

if i call to arrange the exact time she'll probably just back out.

or not pick up. i can't cancel something which hasn't been arranged.

so what do i do instead?

 

[DJDamage]

should i have asked her why in the car why she wont let me kiss her??

Its called low interest, there is no need to ask because you would have gotten B.S answer.

If you have nothing in common and the date didn't go so well then maybe it was the last one and next time she will make up some excuse not to go out with you.

 

[ezily]

there is no date arranged yet.. it's all speculative..

if i call to arrange the exact time she'll probably just back out.

or not pick up. i can't cancel something which hasn't been arranged.

so what do i do instead?

is this the same girl from the other thread? The one you called 5 times in an hour and sent texts to?

If that is the case I really just think you should forget about this weekend. Don't cancel and don't say anything. Chances are she doesn't even remember or care what you "set up" with her. Call her in a couple week or so and set up a better date. Call from your real number. And don't send any retarded texts. I'm telling you, man that you'll be done if you do. If she doesn't answer I would leave a quick voicemail and if she doesn't call back then next her.

 

[drift king]

He mentioned in his message that she might have a boyfriend, would that change what he should do?

The boyfriend might be the reason why she wouldn't let you kiss close...

I'd be interested to know what the advice would be cos I've been in this situation before and the stuff said above is on the assumption she hasn't got a boyfriend and just has low interest?

 

[procanto]

OK, you're not needy, your insecure, very.

thats why you're so needy, you act needy, because you're insecure and you want acceptance and you think you need it, you need to be confident is what you need.you're asking yahoo answer for you personality help because you're insecure and need lots of attention and answer, stop seeking and start telling yourself that you don't constantly need people, cause you don't, you need to figure out who you are inside and then try to open up to the doctor, and tell them who you really are, not just your needs and wants.

 

[true romance]

Pete

Take the metal pipe from DonS and hit it on your head....She is bored to death in your company.

There is no guessing here...it's clearly written, you are insecured, you do not have conversation skills, boring, desperation...She rather go home quilting and watch CSI than hangin with you.

Start reading DJ bible, build confidence...pratice approach, more dating

Move on....no contact

She is probably puking at the thought of having candle light dinner with you....

 

[Mr. Me]

should I have asked her why in the car why she wont let me kiss her??

These are not topics to get into conversations with. She'll only tell you bogus reasons and give you false hope, while by bringing it up, you're showing her that you're clueless (no offense meant).

we were only in the bar for 1 hour and she suddenly announces 'can u take me home?' she wants to go and gossip with her new flatmate than be out with me.. bad sign.

That's more than just a sign, my man. That is The End.

i said to her 'you seem bored'

YIKES! WHY are you acknowledging to her face that you're a boring guy who's boring her enough that she wants OUT????

Again, no offense meant - I'm just being direct about what messages you're giving her.

she tells me i'm sexy when we're in the car and try to kiss her both in the bar and when I dropped her off but she won't let me!!

Right... she's the type that doesn't want to hurt your feelings and/or doesn't want a hostile aggressive situation to happen if she were to tell you the truth, so she tells you things to make you feel good and throws you off.

Like when making plans with you for the weekend, promising you more time. It's not going to happen.

Her actions speak louder than words. Her actions show unmistakably that she'd rather not be with you.

she goes 'no I won't let u.. not here' so I go 'oh so later then? '

No. "not here" is woman-speak for "Not ever with you".

she kept talking about 'discipline' I dont get her...
I think I understand I found out she might have a bf hence no kissing...

Take this to heart: When it doesn't make sense, it's because you're getting a snow job, okay?

i made her promise to meet up this weekend.. but still why would she want to do that if shes bored in a bar with me..

That's a chump move. She probably only agreed to get you to stop. She's gonna flake.

This one's a goner.

Get a few C&F routines together than you can use as material for when you sense things get awkward. Comedians have material they use over and over again at the ready, why shouldn't we? Make fun of things around you.

That, and/or don't be afraid to just end the date. Suddenly announce that you have to call it a night, have an early call the next day, and take her home or whatever and you're better off ending the date before she's bored and wants to go home and has formed a negative opinion of you, even if the date only lasts 45 minutes.

Best to leave them on a high note and wanting more. You'll be the only man that put that shoe on the other foot.

The boyfriend might be the reason why she wouldn't let you kiss close...

Sure... she agrees to go on a date with him and a candle lit dinner this weekend and gets all sexy dressed up for him and gets in his car with him all alone and says "you're so sexy" and when he tries to kiss her she says "not here" instead of objecting because she has a boyfriend but of course, all this is acceptable because she has a boyfriend as long as she didn't kiss him at any point in time.

Does that make ANY sense to you? It shouldn't.

"I think she has a BF and that's why I understand she wouldn't kiss me" is male ego coming up with rationalizations, is what that's all about.

 

[pete101]

These are not topics to get into conversations with. She'll only tell you bogus reasons and give you false hope, while by bringing it up, you're showing her that you're clueless (no offense meant).



That's more than just a sign, my man. That is The End.



YIKES! WHY are you acknowledging to her face that you're a boring guy who's boring her enough that she wants OUT????

Again, no offense meant - I'm just being direct about what messages you're giving her.



Right... she's the type that doesn't want to hurt your feelings and/or doesn't want a hostile aggressive situation to happen if she were to tell you the truth, so she tells you things to make you feel good and throws you off.

Like when making plans with you for the weekend, promising you more time. It's not going to happen.

Her actions speak louder than words. Her actions show unmistakably that she'd rather not be with you.



No. "not here" is woman-speak for "Not ever with you".



Take this to heart: When it doesn't make sense, it's because you're getting a snow job, okay?



That's a chump move. She probably only agreed to get you to stop. She's gonna flake.

This one's a goner.

Get a few C&F routines together than you can use as material for when you sense things get awkward. Comedians have material they use over and over again at the ready, why shouldn't we? Make fun of things around you.

That, and/or don't be afraid to just end the date. Suddenly announce that you have to call it a night, have an early call the next day, and take her home or whatever and you're better off ending the date before she's bored and wants to go home and has formed a negative opinion of you, even if the date only lasts 45 minutes.

Best to leave them on a high note and wanting more. You'll be the only man that put that shoe on the other foot.



Sure... she agrees to go on a date with him and a candle lit dinner this weekend and gets all sexy dressed up for him and gets in his car with him all alone and says "you're so sexy" and when he tries to kiss her she says "not here" instead of objecting because she has a boyfriend but of course, all this is acceptable because she has a boyfriend as long as she didn't kiss him at any point in time.

Does that make ANY sense to you? It shouldn't.

"I think she has a BF and that's why I understand she wouldn't kiss me" is male ego coming up with rationalizations, is what that's all about.

I hear what you're saying.

I found out from someone that she told hiim she had a boyfriend but obviously i haven't brought it up.. is what you're saying is regardless if she has a bf or not she just has low interest in me hence why she wouldn't let me kiss her?