anonymous12345
Senior Don Juan
I grew up with a single mother that, although not a practicing christian, had those values and strongly humanistic. It was the mentality during the time I lived there. As a result I should in first grade take care of a handicapped girl, because, essentially, “Your life is not important, one should devote oneself to others”. I was quite normal, I just wanted to play football with the other boys. Plenty of examples of those things.
Turned into a light lone wolf because I couldn’t be with boys, later on jumped into the abstract world of programming. It is absurd. When I grew up I should of course study gender science, an education in being friend with and simping for women. She did all she could at molesting a young boy.
I got a lot of weight on my shoulders as a young boy. My parents weren’t divorced, but my biological dad chose to live in a different country. So I got the responsibility to handle a grown woman, that was literally stronger than me. There was actually blood in that place. She was a woman with here usual swings, and I realize now with Tomassi etc., she did sh1t tests on me as I was young a teenager. I wasn’t strong enough to handle that. When I moved/fled from home at 17 she cried. My biological dad was a joke. Practicing Christian, cuddles with cats, eats ice cream and candy, and buys every year a book about his teenage idol.
So now there is me, that might have a chance at starting to somewhat appreciate life at the age of 38. A wasted life. It is anger but mostly a lot of pain. The only good thing, which is a good thing, is that I’ve built value, for some reason I’ve worked hard. Good Boy. I’ve also somehow had some kind of assertiveness and appreciation of self indirectly, through proxies by valuing appearance, for instance. Despite all sh1t I wasn’t completely destroyed, there was a man that bowed but never completely or final, and that now somewhat stand up. I don’t know if it’s too late, tbh. It is a lot of pain on a daily basis, and to be honest I’m not really present, although it appears so. Unfortunately it happens though one of the areas which defines a man most, sex. I have troubles asserting me in that area. It’s f0cked up when the most difficult thing to do is to value what one wants, likes and enjoys.
Turned into a light lone wolf because I couldn’t be with boys, later on jumped into the abstract world of programming. It is absurd. When I grew up I should of course study gender science, an education in being friend with and simping for women. She did all she could at molesting a young boy.
I got a lot of weight on my shoulders as a young boy. My parents weren’t divorced, but my biological dad chose to live in a different country. So I got the responsibility to handle a grown woman, that was literally stronger than me. There was actually blood in that place. She was a woman with here usual swings, and I realize now with Tomassi etc., she did sh1t tests on me as I was young a teenager. I wasn’t strong enough to handle that. When I moved/fled from home at 17 she cried. My biological dad was a joke. Practicing Christian, cuddles with cats, eats ice cream and candy, and buys every year a book about his teenage idol.
So now there is me, that might have a chance at starting to somewhat appreciate life at the age of 38. A wasted life. It is anger but mostly a lot of pain. The only good thing, which is a good thing, is that I’ve built value, for some reason I’ve worked hard. Good Boy. I’ve also somehow had some kind of assertiveness and appreciation of self indirectly, through proxies by valuing appearance, for instance. Despite all sh1t I wasn’t completely destroyed, there was a man that bowed but never completely or final, and that now somewhat stand up. I don’t know if it’s too late, tbh. It is a lot of pain on a daily basis, and to be honest I’m not really present, although it appears so. Unfortunately it happens though one of the areas which defines a man most, sex. I have troubles asserting me in that area. It’s f0cked up when the most difficult thing to do is to value what one wants, likes and enjoys.
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