sexual anxiety

[theoneandonlyjay]

please help, im a senior in high school and im not bad looking but im always afraid to be with a girl because i dont think im good in bed. i mean i dont have a problem except that i dont last long.. like 1 minute and ive tried lots of things the most ive gone is maybe 4-5 minutes

 

[Brighty]

How often do you jack off? And do you do kegals?

 

[I'm in the Mood]

Oh my god... common fact: you don't last your first time but you last significantly longer as you gain experience having sex.

Im sure sex is the least of your worries now though, focus on conquering your fears. It may sound cheesy but being afraid of undersatisfying a girl is even more cheesy.

 

[Juice09]

I feel you. Especially when you portray yourself to a girl as an overwhelmingly sexually confident dude. I can relate because I've been in the same situation where I felt I placed the expectations too high.

Do kegals, when your PC muscles get strong enough, you can exercise a certain degree of control just by squeezing them. If you do it at the right moment before you orgasm, you can stop your orgasm. If you do it while you orgasm, you can shoot larger loads and farther distances.

The only drawback is that your girlfriend is going to get frustrated when you're stopping every few minutes to control your orgasm.

Another piece of advice, when you feel like you are getting too excited, think about everything except sex. What you had for dinner last night, math problems, basketball, cars, etc. It can work, but it's not the most reliable technique.

If all else fails, double bag it. Use two condoms. You won't feel a thing but you'll last all night. Only thing is, the condoms are a lot more likely to break, which is why you should only do it as a last resort.

 

[theoneandonlyjay]

well if im not good in bed with a girl at my school are they going to tell everyone because i havent had sex ever with someone at my same school because i do come across as very sexually confident
the girl i was going to date is the most popular girl in the school im just kinda afraid because im not that experienced because i never have sex with an sexually open girls because people here think of guys as man-*****s if they do

 

[Captain Harlock]

well if im not good in bed with a girl at my school are they going to tell everyone because i havent had sex ever with someone at my same school because i do come across as very sexually confident
the girl i was going to date is the most popular girl in the school im just kinda afraid because im not that experienced because i never have sex with an sexually open girls because people here think of guys as man-*****s if they do

and you care about what people think of you?

 

[Juice09]

well if im not good in bed with a girl at my school are they going to tell everyone because i havent had sex ever with someone at my same school because i do come across as very sexually confident
the girl i was going to date is the most popular girl in the school im just kinda afraid because im not that experienced because i never have sex with an sexually open girls because people here think of guys as man-*****s if they do

Of course she's going to tell her friends. No doubt. But as long as you don't have a small **** and last longer than 5 minutes, it shouldn't be a problem.

Work on those kegals, work on your stamina, and if all else fails, double bag it. That's all you CAN do. Don't be afraid to **** this girl just because you're afraid you won't last long enough. Obey your penis.

 

[Captain Harlock]

try wanking on the morning of the day you **** her? Maybe twice? That should desensitize your wang.

 

[Five To One]

and you care about what people think of you?

It could destroy a little thing called rep. Bad rep can run you to the ground when it comes to getting girls. Are you even in high school?


To OP: I understand your fear. Just be careful with who you sleep with until you get experienced and your premature ejac under control. Try staying away from slvts who will make it a bigger deal than it is. A buddy of mine slept with a w-hore and the next day she told the entire girls soccer team what a small d1ck he has. Just make sure she is not a b1tch and your fine.

 

[Captain Harlock]

It could destroy a little thing called rep. Bad rep can run you to the ground when it comes to getting girls. Are you even in high school?

not anymore. Anyway I think it's pretty ridiculous to worry about your reputation when it comes to having sex. Just do it.

 

[Five To One]

Reputation is stupid, I hate it, I wish I didn't have to worry about it, but the thing is my older brother was known as a man***** when he was in high school, some quality girls didn't like him only because of his bad reputation.

My best friend is known as an assh0le, dont doubt for a second that some girls advoid him only because of his jerk ways.


Im not trying to scare the guy, just making sure he thinks about who he sleeps with while he is still learning.

im just saying to make sure he practices with a girl who he trusts and is close with, someone who isnt going to turn around and make him known as the one minute master in bed.

 

[Unl1m1t3d]

I can sympathize with the OP also. I was in a long term relationship and had pretty much mastered control, but unfortunately a year and a half without regular sex (one night stands here and there) and I think I might need to work on that again. I was with my new girlfriend Saturday night for the first time and got a little too excited too quick. And the worst part is after it happens once a part of you worries about it happening again, but you just got to keep it out of your mind. I can attest that once you get used to having sex, especially with that person it gets a lot easier.

 

[eaglez1177]

You guys are all idiots.

First off, do not, DO NOT EVER double bag it. That is the worst idea ever because the condom is more likely to break and your gonna have trouble getting it on/keeping it on.

Second, when your having sex, RELAAAAAXXXX. Go at a slow speed, take deep breaths, and get out all of your nervousness about having sex. The more worrying that is going on in your head, the less control your going to have. Dont get all worked up, nervous, and anxious about having sex cuz this will also make your come quick.

 

[Dirty D]

I used to have the same problem, and it's caused by two things: A) you're too excited yourself (you're as horny as a bunny) and B) because you didn't have sex for a long time, you're little guy is more sensitive when you stimulate. Think about it: if you've just had sex, you can do it again but you won't *** fast, but if you haven't had sex for 3 weeks? Different story.

Here's how I solved it:
- Think about things not related to sex..like your most boring class, your job, boring times, etc. WARNING: don't overdo it, or you'll face certain "going down" syndrome (think about granny sex for too long and it'll almost FALL down, trust me :crackup: )
- Switch positions..if you notice that an orgasm is near or very near, go out and tell her you want to try another position. Trust me, hardly any woman will object..and you just bought yourself a minute or so if you try 2 to 3 different positions in total
- You can't switch every minute though, so it's smart to GO SLOW: instead of doing it like an overly horny dog that thurst 3 times per second, do one every 1-2 seconds..so just slow down the sex. Women will LOVE it, because going out and going in simply takes much longer = more stimulation for longer period of time = friggin' nice for them (my current gf wants nothing BUT slow sex).
- Go out or almost out..I don't want to get too pornographic here, but it's a handy idea to sometimes go all the way in up to your balls (so really deep) and then go out all the way or to the tip of your little guy or all the way out, wait a while and go in again. Why? It's INTERRUPTING the stimulation for yourself, so you'll need to start all over again
- Foreplay...stop out of the blue, and go down on her or ask her to go down on you, and continue afterwards
- There are a little more crazy tips out there too, but they do work if you really want to prevent from having an orgasm after 3 seconds of having sex (and making a total fool out of yourself because of it)..and it's: jerk off a day or a few days before, then your little guy is less sensitive to stimulation. When you're still learning how to make the most out of all the other tips, this one is a starting point and the easiest to do.

P.S: try reading the kama sutra does all this help?

 

[The_Scotman]

dude jsut get with girl after girl till you get it down

 

[Captain]

Don't ever double bag condoms.

Always spend ~30 minutes going down on her before you actually start having sex.

Kegels are very effective, but need to be done daily for at least 15 minutes for a few months.

 

[TheBucketOfTruth]

Even if you can't get the job done and last too long yet (it's a common thing), just make up for it in other ways. As others said, go down on her before and/or afterwards as well as using your fingers to your advantage. I'm no olympic medalist in sex either, but when I don't satisfy with my wang I can more than make up for it other ways.

 

[I-tallionStallion]

Don't ever double bag condoms.

Always spend ~30 minutes going down on her before you actually start having sex.

Kegels are very effective, but need to be done daily for at least 15 minutes for a few months.

Spend 30 minutes going down on her? Are you kids crazy? Why the hell does she deserve that long.

The more you have sex the longer you last cause you get used to it. Whack off beforehand. Wear a condom if your going to have sex.

I very strongly advise against sex though, a tiny hole in a condom could allow sperm to travel through thus getting her pregnant. Don't have sex with a woman unless your in a serious relationship. Men value virgins, and so do women. Just look how fvcking crazy women go over the gay Jonas brothers and their purity rings

 

[eaglez1177]

Spend 30 minutes going down on her? Are you kids crazy? Why the hell does she deserve that long.

The more you have sex the longer you last cause you get used to it. Whack off beforehand. Wear a condom if your going to have sex.

I very strongly advise against sex though, a tiny hole in a condom could allow sperm to travel through thus getting her pregnant. Don't have sex with a woman unless your in a serious relationship. Men value virgins, and so do women. Just look how fvcking crazy women go over the gay Jonas brothers and their purity rings

Sh*tty advice. Even if you are in a serious relationship, you still wouldnt want your girl getting fukin pregnant. And condoms rarely break unless your a retard and dont know how to use it. They have an effectiveness of about 95%.