I am having this problem and I have no idea why. I was a virgin until I met my current girlfriend. She is my first partner and we have had actual sex 4 times w/ my getting off. But for some reason I am like having erectile dysfunction. Say we'll be making out and getting naked and I'll be hard. But when we get around to putting the condom on and then when I go to stick it in her I'm soft by that time and sometimes i can't get real hard again. Attraction is not the problem. She is very attractive to me. But of course she thinks she is the problem and gets afraid I'm losing interest in her. I honestly have no idea why all of a sudden go soft. Being nervous is probably my best guess. I used to be nervous about how I would perform and now I get nervous about going soft. A) Why am I going soft and B) What can I tell her to keep her from getting mad at me and to assure her I still love her and she does it for me?
Sex problem
- Thread starter bud_2005
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Kevin Cass
Don Juan
tell her that the problem isnt her that its you, and that you really love her, and get her off other ways, oral sex, using ur fingers, that would probably get u hard again. if it doesnt then u can
also go to the doctor he might give you something to treat ur nerves. dont worry lots of people have this problem!
also go to the doctor he might give you something to treat ur nerves. dont worry lots of people have this problem!
CactusMcDougal
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Like my therapist says: "All your problems are inside that thick skull of yours!"
How is smoking weed gonna make someone have more erections? It seems to me that would make someone have a harder time getting hard than it would help. Anyway, I have had this problem too, and it's from being fairly new to sex, and being nervous about your performance I would think. That's what happens to me sometimes. The exact same thing, I am rock hard when we kiss and touch, but when I go to put on the condom, I kinda get soft.
CactusMcDougal
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Substance use only facilitates an altered sense of perception. That would not be a very feasible solution to the problem at hand.
So pimp its scary
Master Don Juan
Don't stop the foreplay while she's putting the condom on... if you stop, grab the jimmy, put it on and then keep going might be long enough of a pause to make you start losing the erection.
PuroDeAgave
Don Juan
i read that weed can increase sex drive or reduce it. i tend to last longer when im high on weed but it also takes me longer to get an erection even though it feels 10 times better.
oakraiderz2
Master Don Juan
Stop jacking it.
Last Man Standing
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If you think you have problems with a limp penis now - just wait and see what happens when you are 40 y/o and your arteries are clogged and thus the blood flow is restricted due to not exercising and eating junk food as your main diet, and consistently smoking and drinking on a daily basis, being sedentary on a computer all day, repeatedly getting kicked in the balls for unwanted sexual advances, and eating a few hundred pounds of meat over a lifetime? Not that I'm speaking
from experience
Seriously, you just need to become comfortable with a girl - which takes time.
from experience
Seriously, you just need to become comfortable with a girl - which takes time.
Last edited:
dap
Senior Don Juan
"How is smoking weed gonna make someone have more erections?"
It increases your libido. Don't smoke too much of course, or else you will fall asleep. I would recommend drinking some red bull too. Also, perhaps you are not comfortable around her? Just a thought.
It increases your libido. Don't smoke too much of course, or else you will fall asleep. I would recommend drinking some red bull too. Also, perhaps you are not comfortable around her? Just a thought.
OK, a real answer.
If you're still getting hard, you don't have erectile dysfunction. You have performance anxiety. Erectile Dysfunction is a physical problem, anxiety is an emotional one that manifests itself physically (in a very unfortunate way).
More or less the same thing happened to me not long ago. The #1 tip is t relax and not worry about it. Sound impossible? Just work on being comfortable with her. Spend some time naked in bed without expectation of sex, then go at it when you're ready. Have her make you hard, then let it go, then have her do it again so you'll know your erections will come back.
The next time you have sex, let her be on top.
She could also go on the pill so you don't need condoms at all (assuming you're both clean).
If you're still getting hard, you don't have erectile dysfunction. You have performance anxiety. Erectile Dysfunction is a physical problem, anxiety is an emotional one that manifests itself physically (in a very unfortunate way).
More or less the same thing happened to me not long ago. The #1 tip is t relax and not worry about it. Sound impossible? Just work on being comfortable with her. Spend some time naked in bed without expectation of sex, then go at it when you're ready. Have her make you hard, then let it go, then have her do it again so you'll know your erections will come back.
The next time you have sex, let her be on top.
She could also go on the pill so you don't need condoms at all (assuming you're both clean).