Self-esteem is at ground-zero

[Engetsu]

I really don't know where to go, so I'm asking you people here...

I'm having problems at school. Bully problems more precisely. Yesterday, a girl and 3 of her guy friends came to see a friend of mine, and I was there. My friend knew the girl since childhood, so he started talking to her, but as he was talking to her, he was dissing her. Later on, he told me he's always done that since they were little. She also initiated a little conversation with me, all in front of her guy friends that we didn't know, except one that has a class with me.

When the girl left, me and my friend were talking about her "features" out loud, but in our native language, so she wouldn't understand. However, her friends speak our language and they heard us talk about her ass and everything... I can honestly say that was we did wasn't a very DJ thing to do, especially that I said some bad comments about the girl, i.e. she has a rat face and no tits, etc. The girl has a ghetto booty and really isn't that bad, I'd say a 7.5...

All this to say that her friends heard us. Then they all left. Then me and my friend sat down and 3 other guys joined us and we were just talking and fooling around, only to see, ten minutes later, five guys built like tanks came to talk to my friend. They threatened him and told him not to talk to that girl anymore, then they turned to me and said "you too". I didn't even know her, so I said "I don't know your friend, why would I talk to her?". He replied "Good, then don't" or something close to that.

One of the guys in the group that came to talk to us, I knew, since I had my self-defense class with him, and he didn't say a word throughout the whole convo where it was mostly the 5 guys against my friend, threatening him and insulting him.

This will obviously get me reputation problems at school, since I can't talk to all those guys anymore, and any of their friends since they all chill together. They're also considered as the "cool" people at school... They're all a a year older than us, they dress fashionably, all smoke and drive cars... Well, you get what I mean.

My school is a CEGEP, which means it's between high school and college, but it's more similar to a college, so if there's a fight, we all get kicked out since this is a very respected college and it's hard to get in.

All in all, my DJ reputation is crushed, since I'm going to live in fear the rest of my days and I'll get looked at very crooked by all those people and their friends, especially their girl friends. I'm supposed to be social with everyone, but now I can't anymore. Because of this, my self-esteem has hit a downlow... When I go to public places, I can't use my voice fully anymore. I'm back to being that shy AFC again... I don't even feel like listening to music anymore, which is very bad.

Plus, the day after tomorrow, I'll have to face one of those five guys in my courses. We used to always joke around together in that class, but I guess things will have changed now, and I don't know what to tell him about what happened yesterday.

This whole thing sucks, obviously, I wonder what to do, I'm so lost... How do I handle this situation in a DJ manner?

 

[Cloud-uk]

christ man, some people need to lighten up. You too.

Big deal, you said some girl had a bit of a ratty face and a flat chest, big ****ing deal. Don't you get it? You go back to AFC, you lose. You lose EVERYTHING. Your life will end up a screw up and you'll regret not listening to me for the rest of your life! SHOCK HORROR! Seriously, your mindset is clearly lacking in several respects.

1) You need more determination- you will get there, but not with this attitude.

2) You need to stand up for yourself. And by that I mean take some responcibility. Bad mouthing girl's behind their back? Not a DJ thing to do? No **** sherlock. Have some balls and stand up to her mates. What? There's five of them and they'll kick your ass? Serves you right.

Seriously, if one of them talks to you about it- just say you lied. If they get all heavy about it tell them to chill out, don't threaten them for christ sakes. What did you say "her afce is a bit ratty and she aint get any tits, but her ass is hot ****" oh my! I've never heard such an insult in my life!

My advice? Don't act like this is a big defeat, this is you proving you have balls. How about apologising to this girl (dont amke it seam like ur only doing it cos ur scared of getting beaten). Tell ehr you're sorry about what you said about her tits but you also said her ass was great so she really doesn't have much to be pissed off about.

Well, either you act like a man and stand up for your mistakes, screw the consequences, or you live the rest of yourlife as a nobody. Your choice!

Oh plus tell them to lay off your mate, if he's gd friend swith the girl they have no ****ing right to get heavy on him. Again, don't make that a threat, see where I'm going here? Avoid confrontations, doesn't sound like you'll win. If they say "or you'll what?" just say you wont do anything, you just think they need to chill out a bit. If they want to be all imature about it, screw them, at least u were a man and tried.

Hope that helps a bit.

 

[Engetsu]

I agree, I need to change my attitude in general.

But the advice you gave me is on a situation that's already over. They already threatened us, and they already put us on their "blacklist", as in people not to talk to.

What they actually wanted is for my friend to talk to the girl with respect. What he told me, is that she'd never send out 5 guys to fix her own problems, if she had anything to say to him, she should have come and fix it herself. So, as you see, there's a touch of hypocrisy from her behalf.

Also, I can't really apologize to the girl since I don't even know her, I just met her yesterday. And the 5 guys didn't make allusions to what we said, so I don't know if she's pissed because I said that she was "****able" in general when she was there, or talk **** about her behind her back... You see, it's pretty complicated.

The biggest problem for me is the guy in my class. We used to be ok with each other before, what should I tell him when I see him in class thursday? (I can't avoid him since we're only 3 guys in the whole class, and we have to be in the locker room together)

 

[dbot]

So the chick has a whole cracksquad of groupies behind her. So what? When you're in class just act normal and joke around with him as if nothing him and his buddies did even phased you. If he still acts like a d*ck, then tell him to lighten the fuk up because the matter has nothing to do with him anyway.

 

[Julian]

Dude tell this rat girl to go back to the sewers to marry Splinter. Jk lol

When you go to class talk to the dude like normal and if hes acting shady then you will know hes just a b1tch and you might as well dissasociate from him.

 

[drixsa]

How old are you??

all these problems are so immature and they seem straight out of a bad 80's movie

you are worrying way way too much

the truth is that you shouldnt have been talkin s#it about this girl until you were with you close friend(s), so let that be a lesson to ya

dont worry about those dudes jus keep doin your thing, its pretty overrated to try to act like a "thug"

if you want to keep talkin to the kid in your class do so, im sure he doesnt give one ****

if he gives you a bad vibe like anyone just let him be and move on

how you thought that the girl had no tits and a rat's face yet you thought that she is a 7.5 is beyond me...

i really think that you are makin this out to be a bigger deal than it really is