I've noticed that I say "No" to my wife every time she has a request or wants to do something. In the beginning, I was more open to her ideas & everything but now I'm extremely resistance & just want to be by myself on the computer. I think my behavoir is getting in the way of us having a great relationship. I'm thinking of using Doc Love's technique saying "No" once a month but I'll say Yes to everything else just so I can have some structure because I'm no good at this marriage stuff. Almost, like I have a "No" card & I can only use it once a month. I remember writing to Doc Love awhile back & he told me that when you get married, you lose half of your freedom...What are your guy's thoughts on all this?
Saying "No" to a woman
- Thread starter R2Change
- Start date
Seriously, I'm not married but why are you asking this question? Why did you get married in the first place? It's a two-way street, you should listen to your wife's ideas and show that you're understanding. Just go with your gut on decisions, don't be too concerned if you find yourself saying yes, after all you are together for a reason, and people who share similar qualities will agree on things from time to time.
BeyondCharm
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 14, 2008
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I think Doc Love gave you a dose of reality that you lost half of your freedom. Also, we barely know enough about your relationship to really offer any advice. What questions are you saying No to? Sounds like you are bored with your wife and your life.
kingsam
Master Don Juan
what doc love is talking about is not saying "yes" all the time (like most guys do - who are all AFC). its about being asseritve, standing up for your beleifs, not giving in to every little demand, dont conpromise your standerds...etc (by doing this you relinquish all control and stop being any sort of challenge)....
WHY? a RL is a marathon not a sprint - most peole start off sprinting and burn out...
and he also says "if you give them an inch they will take a mile" ...
OP you cant just randomly start saying "NO"... you have to be consistent with the lines you draw (from the start of a RL)...because you did the total AFC way and just gave in to all demands you have now set a precident of giving in... she isnt used to it...and WONT like it....
maybe you should pay for doc love's time (phone coahing) to advise you how subtley and gradualy retake some control and challenge. it would be better for you than the mostly half-assed answers you will get here...
and OP do you have Docloves book? if not ...GET IT!
a general tip for readers- just following the PUA advice will NOT put you in a good situation (knowledge wise) for a RL - Doc Loves stuff WILL get you RL-ready...DL isnt a PUA - its RL orientated
WHY? a RL is a marathon not a sprint - most peole start off sprinting and burn out...
and he also says "if you give them an inch they will take a mile" ...
OP you cant just randomly start saying "NO"... you have to be consistent with the lines you draw (from the start of a RL)...because you did the total AFC way and just gave in to all demands you have now set a precident of giving in... she isnt used to it...and WONT like it....
maybe you should pay for doc love's time (phone coahing) to advise you how subtley and gradualy retake some control and challenge. it would be better for you than the mostly half-assed answers you will get here...
and OP do you have Docloves book? if not ...GET IT!
a general tip for readers- just following the PUA advice will NOT put you in a good situation (knowledge wise) for a RL - Doc Loves stuff WILL get you RL-ready...DL isnt a PUA - its RL orientated