Saving Hoes

[JoeMarron]

I think many of the problems men here run into concerning women exists because they're chasing after women who are fundamentally broken. David Shade talks about the importance of selecting women wisely, ones who had a good relationship with their father, high self-esteem, intelligent, no traumatic experiences in their past, etc. Looking back on your past relationships, whether it was an ltr or friends with benefits, did the most drama filled ones correlate with the fact that the woman didn't have these attributes?

 

[floydb25]

Yes, and I specifically sought them out due to my own issues of low self-worth, approval-seeking, co-dependancy, etc. Took a long time to realize what was going on, and how much damage I was doing to myself... on purpose. With friends, as well. They were ALL fake, toxic, dysfunctional, selfish, and abusive - with unhealthy, trauma-filled pasts. I wanted to save people so they'd accept me - only to have ALL of their problems dumped onto me. Made quite the good scapegoat, too.

If unhealthy patterns like these continue - you gotta look at the only common denominator: you.

Ironically enough, all of these hoes and bishes I tried saving went through the EXACT same thing, with the exact same people, for the exact same reasons, and put me through the exact same situations, which I put myself into for the exact same reasons. Hmmmmmm... :kick:

 

[Jules_Winfield]

Yes, and I specifically sought them out due to my own issues of low self-worth, approval-seeking, co-dependancy, etc. Took a long time to realize what was going on, and how much damage I was doing to myself... on purpose. With friends, as well. They were ALL fake, toxic, dysfunctional, selfish, and abusive - with unhealthy, trauma-filled pasts. I wanted to save people so they'd accept me - only to have ALL of their problems dumped onto me. Made quite the good scapegoat, too.

If unhealthy patterns like these continue - you gotta look at the only common denominator: you.

This behavior is what brought me to this site years ago. I knew I was the problem, but didn't know how to overcome my issues until I came here.

Healthy women are getting harder to find because divorce, rape, and child molestation are common in this country. We think we're cool, charming, and have game, but most of the woman we easily sleep with have issues like the ones I've stated.

 

[PlayHer Man]

In the world of today the most a man should look for is a good mother for his kids.--> A woman who will help to raise them well.

Looking for a "life partner" in modern times is the domain of chumps and fools. There is no golden p*ssy or soul mate. Even if there is.. do you really want your happiness to depend so much on another person? Kind of pathetic.

A man who can be happy alone will always have women chasing him. So why settle for one?

I've said this before --> White knights and men who want to "save" women are losers who feel worthless as men. They need to feel relevant and important so they live for others (women).

 

[JoeMarron]

Yes, and I specifically sought them out due to my own issues of low self-worth, approval-seeking, co-dependancy, etc. Took a long time to realize what was going on, and how much damage I was doing to myself... on purpose. With friends, as well. They were ALL fake, toxic, dysfunctional, selfish, and abusive - with unhealthy, trauma-filled pasts. I wanted to save people so they'd accept me - only to have ALL of their problems dumped onto me. Made quite the good scapegoat, too.

If unhealthy patterns like these continue - you gotta look at the only common denominator: you.

Ironically enough, all of these hoes and bishes I tried saving went through the EXACT same thing, with the exact same people, for the exact same reasons, and put me through the exact same situations, which I put myself into for the exact same reasons. Hmmmmmm... :kick:

Hah I had a feeling you would comment. There's no fixing people like that. They have to do it themselves just like you and Jules_Winfield did.

In the world of today the most a man should look for is a good mother for his kids.--> A woman who will help to raise them well.

Looking for a "life partner" in modern times is the domain of chumps and fools. There is no golden p*ssy or soul mate. Even if there is.. do you really want your happiness to depend so much on another person? Kind of pathetic.

A man who can be happy alone will always have women chasing him. So why settle for one?

I've said this before --> White knights and men who want to "save" women are losers who feel worthless as men. They need to feel relevant and important so they live for others (women).

I see doing it with a "life partner" the best way to raise children though. I agree with not having your happiness depending on one person. Every man should be able to be happy alone but what's wrong with him taking a woman as a partner that will enhance his life? It's like driving a Lambo instead of a Corvette. Sure a man can be perfectly content and happy with the Corvette but the Lambo enhances his life more, just like a good woman by his side will. As far as settling for one woman I'm not a people person at all. The less people I have to deal with the better so I can't be bothered with dealing with multiple plates forever.

 

[PlayHer Man]

Hah I had a feeling you would comment. There's no fixing people like that. They have to do it themselves just like you and Jules_Winfield did.



I see doing it with a "life partner" the best way to raise children though. I agree with not having your happiness depending on one person. Every man should be able to be happy alone but what's wrong with him taking a woman as a partner that will enhance his life? It's like driving a Lambo instead of a Corvette. Sure a man can be perfectly content and happy with the Corvette but the Lambo enhances his life more, just like a good woman by his side will. As far as settling for one woman I'm not a people person at all. The less people I have to deal with the better so I can't be bothered with dealing with multiple plates forever.

There are no "good women" just like there are no "good men". What exists is people who have different things to offer others at various prices. Every woman has her price and some offer more value than others.

Therefore.. do the monogamous relationship if that makes you happy. Just don't get married and don't eat sh!t. The kids should be the priority. The woman MUST put the kids first or she is not worthy of motherhood OR your commitment.

This is why I say look for a woman who will be a good MOTHER rather than a good life partner. As a man you can replace a woman. Your kids can't replace their mother.

 

[backseatjuan]

Yes, and I specifically sought them out due to my own issues of low self-worth, approval-seeking, co-dependancy, etc.

Kinda like that, only sought out anybody without filtering because was lonely. But most women are f'cked up anyways, even so called virgins take up their butt and remain "innocent". The opposite of a girl with issues is a girl queen, she's so pampered that she's f'cked up by definition.

 

[JoeMarron]

There are no "good women" just like there are no "good men". What exists is people who have different things to offer others at various prices. Every woman has her price and some offer more value than others.

Therefore.. do the monogamous relationship if that makes you happy. Just don't get married and don't eat sh!t. The kids should be the priority. The woman MUST put the kids first or she is not worthy of motherhood OR your commitment.

This is why I say look for a woman who will be a good MOTHER rather than a good life partner. As a man you can replace a woman. Your kids can't replace their mother.

I'm quite cynical but saying there are no good women is a bit of a stretch. Yes people don't do things unless it benefits them but surely we can objectively say that there are some women who will behave more like what we would consider "good' than others. The woman that embodies the traits that I listed in the OP is less likely to screw you over in a divorce, cheat on you, rack up a massive partner count, etc. I agree with everything else although I'm inclined to believe that the traits of a good mother and a good life partner overlap.

 

[floydb25]

Kinda like that, only sought out anybody without filtering because was lonely. But most women are f'cked up anyways, even so called virgins take up their butt and remain "innocent". The opposite of a girl with issues is a girl queen, she's so pampered that she's f'cked up by definition.

Yea, that too. But she had to be hot. Those were my only standards. I mean, I HAD more, but they all went out the window once I found a crazy hot bish with daddy issues and more baggage than an airport. A lot of the misunderstood bad girl BS. "Oh, she's real nice deep down!"

 

[PlayHer Man]

I'm quite cynical but saying there are no good women is a bit of a stretch. Yes people don't do things unless it benefits them but surely we can objectively say that there are some women who will behave more like what we would consider "good' than others. The woman that embodies the traits that I listed in the OP is less likely to screw you over in a divorce, cheat on you, rack up a massive partner count, etc. I agree with everything else although I'm inclined to believe that the traits of a good mother and a good life partner overlap.

Right. But the main problem with marriage is the power you give the woman (even if she never uses it).

Its like giving someone a knife they can use to chop off your balls anytime they feel like it and with no consequence.

Your only defense against getting your nuts chopped off is you "trust them not to do it". Ok.. so maybe they'll never do it because they are not that type of person --> But the point is.. they have the power to do it and get away with it.

Why give someone that power?

 

[JoeMarron]

Right. But the main problem with marriage is the power you give the woman (even if she never uses it).

Its like giving someone a knife they can use to chop off your balls anytime they feel like it and with no consequence.

Your only defense against getting your nuts chopped off is you "trust them not to do it". Ok.. so maybe they'll never do it because they are not that type of person --> But the point is.. they have the power to do it and get away with it.

Why give someone that power?

Oh Im certainly not a cheerleader for marriage. Im not completely against it but yes a man is taking a colossal risk when he chooses it. However, everyone here loves to talk about the negatives of marriage but never the positives. If men here can see both sides, perhaps seeing that the negatives far outweigh the positives, then they'll be able to make a more informed decision. I'll start a separate thread on this.