Risk is relative

[chicago#1]

For all you people that are afraid to make the approach, and start the conversation:

If you drive, you may get sideswiped at an intersection, yet you still do it with little worry;

If you screw up at work, you may get fired, yet you show up 5 times a week;

A close friend or family member may die tomorrow, yet you are not paralysed by this minute to minute;

You might get mugged in the lot at night after leaving the bar, yet you stil go out;

In fact, anything can happen.

And if a woman is not interested, what is the worst thing that can possibly happen? Simple, you are one more closer to the one you want.

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"In the land of the blind, a one eyed man is king"

 

[Monkey]

So true.

If you think about it, approaching women is THE safest thing that most of us would do in a day.

But somehow when we were growing up someone/something implanted the thought that women would KILL US if we asked them out.

Really?!? what the hell is that about.

We drive cars - something a human was not designed to do
We ride on planes - something a human was not designed to do
...you get the idea.

But we find it hard to approach women - something that is one of THE most natural human natures other than breathing and eating!??!

Its a crazy world - but talking to a woman is probably THE SAFEST part of it!!!

 

[Ralph Bellamy]

Originally posted by chicago#1:
For all you people that are afraid to make the approach, and start the conversation:

If you drive, you may get sideswiped at an intersection, yet you still do it with little worry;

...On the other hand, if I drove down a particular highway and got sideswiped or collided with 90% of the time, I would probably not go there again.

And if a woman is not interested, what is the worst thing that can possibly happen? Simple, you are one more closer to the one you want.

This ("Every rejection is one step closer to a yes") is the one sentiment I have seen *everywhere*, from the most AFC-ish, women-driven advice to even in the DJ bible. And I *still* wholeheartedly disagree with it. Why? Because if you are in a dry spell it gets your hopes up unnecessarily, starting a downward spiral that just makes things worse. If #20 is a bust, I will more likely assume #21 is closer to a "yes," but if I get to #35 and still no yes I will likely be all the more discouraged than encouraged. And it will show.

My alternative: read the DJ Bible, learn not only how to improve your life in a way that makes you attractive, but how to read the interest level of whoever you approach so you won't waste your time and hopes on the no-sales. And forget you ever heard about the law of averages. Just move forward, away from the numbers, away from everything. That's what I did and my confidence and luck improved a whole lot. If you *still* get shot down most of the time you will at least have the confidence to know you gave her your best shot and she's the one with the issues. For God's sakes don't keep score with yourself, just forget her and keep looking for the lucky girl.

 

[Nocturnal]

everything is relative.

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"Life cannot reach total perfection until it has seen total imperfection."
-Yours Truly

"High risk can yield only high loss or high reward."
-Yours Truly

"Ignorance is a blessing."
-Yours Truly

"If you don't know the meaning of life why are you trying to win. Isn't that the same as not knowing what you're fighting for?"
-Yours Truly

 

[Squy]

Originally posted by Ralph Bellamy:
This ("Every rejection is one step closer to a yes") is the one sentiment I have seen *everywhere*, from the most AFC-ish, women-driven advice to even in the DJ bible. And I *still* wholeheartedly disagree with it. Why? Because if you are in a dry spell it gets your hopes up unnecessarily, starting a downward spiral that just makes things worse. If #20 is a bust, I will more likely assume #21 is closer to a "yes," but if I get to #35 and still no yes I will likely be all the more discouraged than encouraged. And it will show.

It is very unlikely that you wont get any results after 30 approach! Unless you intendly do it to get blow off. The hardest thing is to actually initiate an approach, Ralph Bellamy have you tried?

 

[Ralph Bellamy]

Originally posted by Squy:
It is very unlikely that you wont get any results after 30 approach! Unless you intendly do it to get blow off. The hardest thing is to actually initiate an approach, Ralph Bellamy have you tried?

No, I didn't intentionally do it to get blown off, and yes, I initiated the approaches 28 of the 30 times. On all 30 I seemed to have the green light until I actually tried to # close, then I got that pause before some lame excuse, some unconvincing claim to having a boyfriend, or a "sure" followed by a phoney phone number. I got five to say "yes" to lunch or dinner and *all five* stood me up. Part of the problem, apparently, is that I get sorted into the "friend" pile too quickly and obviously I need to work on preventing that.

 

[Squy]

Have you heard of the word: Learning?

Jessess, find out what you did wrong the first time you screwed up, and try to change it. You find good clues in this site. You know what doing the same thing over and over and expect a different result also known as? INSANITY. Another thing, failure is the mother of success, I can ramble on and on hehe.

You are doing good, dont worry, results will come in time.

 

[lil devun]

good sh!t man..
i take more physical risks than anyone i know and ive always been telling myself exactly what u have in your post.