Relationship with girlfriend has gone south because of her career. What do I do?

aww_kittah_aww

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Ive been dating this girl since February and we have hit things off very well. We got along great together. She is a prosecutor for the state. The last two months her case load has greatly increased.

I backed off to give her some space so she could focus on her cases. At the same time I noticed the time we did spend together wasnt the same. Our sex lives went from great to non-existent. The times we did talk were very short. There was no intimacy whatsoever. We saw each other once or twice a week. I feel she slowly started to pull away from me.

I asked her this weekend if everything was okay when she turned down an offer to stay at my place. She proceeded to say that she liked me a lot and wanted to be with me but couldn't commit to me emotionally because she was exhausted from her job. She wanted to be "friends".

I do see where she's coming from as lately she's been working 12 days and sometimes on the weekends. She said "she was sorry for the way things are right now."

"I don't know what will happen. I need some time now to see what I even want."

Guess I just want to see if anyone has been in the same shoes as me and maybe offer some advice? I haven't dated a girl that cares about her career as much as this one. It was the main reason I wanted to pursue something with her.
 

f283000

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aww_kittah_aww said:
I asked her this weekend if everything was okay when she turned down an offer to stay at my place. She proceeded to say that she liked me a lot and wanted to be with me but couldn't commit to me emotionally because she was exhausted from her job. She wanted to be "friends".
I think this is over brother sorry.

What I will say is this. No matter how busy a woman is if you stay relevant and "above her" she will do whatever she can to f*** you no matter if she works 12 hour days or not.

Staying relevant and above a woman is not necessarily making more money than her. Guys that are broke and live with their parents bang hot professional women too and what does that tell you?

So what does staying above her and relevant mean? It means showing her that you got a life of your own. Showing her how you have a great time when you're not with her. Giving her the feeling that when you are not with her you are around other women and talk to other women. Giving her the feeling that you got other options and can bounce anytime. It means staying interesting, fun, unpredictable and attractive.

I get the feeling from your story that you wanted an LTR, she became busy, you kept wanting to see her often, the times you saw her were the same as the times that you saw her when she wasn't busy, she became bored and you became a nuisance to her. She knows you got no other options so why should she put in any effort into staying competitive against other women?
 

Iceberg

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f283000 said:
I think this is over brother sorry.

What I will say is this. No matter how busy a woman is if you stay relevant and "above her" she will do whatever she can to f*** you no matter if she works 12 hour days or not.
100% agree.

She will use her career as the excuse for dumping you, but the truth is, the relationship ran its course, and she got bored. So now she wants to be "friends".

When a girl is into you, she will find any possible way to be with you. If she's busy 7 days a week, then she'll plan to feed you and f**k you on her lunch break. Don't ever take that "career" excuse as a serious thing. Passion always rules over logic (career).
 

MatthEaddicT

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Its always just you vs you. Do lots of positive new things. Make your own new crazy rockyIV workout. Make sure you eat a multivitamin. Approach New Hotter Women. I mean why not date a hot army girl who's in Afghanistan instead,jj. She has chosen every step of her career. They didn't draft her into sending fools to jail. She's gonna get hers so set your goals highER and highER and you won't have to be patient you will be busy. As for her she's dedicated to her job so unless your jaimefoxx savin her from tomcruise you better be better at what ever you do. & DJ bootcamp never hurt anyone that's what I'm doin;)
 

aww_kittah_aww

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MatthEaddicT said:
Its always just you vs you. Do lots of positive new things. Make your own new crazy rockyIV workout. Make sure you eat a multivitamin. Approach New Hotter Women. I mean why not date a hot army girl who's in Afghanistan instead,jj. She has chosen every step of her career. They didn't draft her into sending fools to jail. She's gonna get hers so set your goals highER and highER and you won't have to be patient you will be busy. As for her she's dedicated to her job so unless your jaimefoxx savin her from tomcruise you better be better at what ever you do. & DJ bootcamp never hurt anyone that's what I'm doin;)
Details on DJ bootcamp?
 

Pardner

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An excuse. If she cared about you she would work your relationship into her career. Always have more than one girl ready on the table in case things like this happen. A girl like this won't matter much when you have another girl lined up ready to go.
 

Warrior74

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When they are into you, they find the time. When their interest level drops, they make excuses. The last single mum I dated made time to come and see me 3-4 times a week. When she saw I wasn't going to commit suddenly her kids and school became 'too time consuming'. Now she's making plenty of time for the guy she's currently dating. Don't be mad, just charge it to the game and keep on rocking.
 
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