Relationship and Job frustration...

[Analysis]

Hey DJ's,
I want to start out w/ saying that l have been with my for 3 years. She's wonderful ( She's flexible and a giver- She takes me out all the time) I applied the system and it work. My problem is my job...I've work at an entertainment job for 3 years and the most I've made in one year is 17,000. I work full-time hours but I'm still part-time status. I've applied for two full-time positions and got rejected both times. She tells me she gets frustrated some times by me working at this job because there not moving me up. My parents even tell me sometimes that I need a job with benefits. I get frustrated myself some times because I have a college degree and I'm making 13,000 -17,000 and I'm living at home with my parents. My girl makes over 55,000 and has a nice apartment. Will my girls interest level drop if I don't become more self-reliant, get a full-time job w/ benefits and leave my parents house...It's a fun job but I don't know where to go...She always talks about marriage so I know she loves me but I want to keep it that way...What do you think?

 

[Julian]

Are you happy with your job?

being stuck like that would piss me off personally.

 

[I'm Joe Dirt]

What is this entertainment job exactly? A stripper at Denny's or something? A clown for childrens parties?

Seriously now, with a college degree you should not be making that low amount of money. There are part time sales people who work 20-25 hours a week who make more than you. That's pathetic.

You need to find a career and not just a job. And yes, a girl's IL level WILL start dropping as you are making chump change ($8.20 an hour is my calculation to gross $17k in 1 year with full time hours) and aren't going anywhere.

I make about $8k a year right now working 10 hours per week on a part time job I keep, which is about 1/2 of what you make, but I'm also working 4 times less. What I'm trying to say is you gotta get a decent job.

Your current job may be fun and all, but you gotta grow up. You gotta be able to move out on your own at some point and it doesn't look like you have a new promotion or pay raise that will get you there in your future unless you move to a better job.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Women do tend to admire men who are able to be self sufficient. You are in luck that your girl has the traits necessary for a keeper (thank you Doc Love), you have a chance to make a change with her in your corner.

The thing is two turned down interviews is barely worth a speck of dust in a job hunting saga. Understand that you may not find the "perfect" job, but you do have a chance of finding something better. Better doesn't necessarily tons of money either so don't fall into the trap of taking a job you hate just because it pays well.

What it comes down to is that a woman with the qualities of yours will admire and appreciate a man that can hold his own more so than one that is kinda floundering. Come on, you're still living with your parents. I know a lot of guys are proponents of this especially if they are in school but nothing screams independence more than having your own place.

It sounds like you have a good girl and it's good that you want to keep her. The thing is, a good girl deserves a good guy, and the really good girls are smart enough to know that. Do what you already know that you need to do to become that type of guy.

 

[themanwithnoname]

I don't think it really matters. I'm sure she's dated guys that were much more self sufficient yet they turned out to be less of a man than you are.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by themanwithnoname
I don't think it really matters. I'm sure she's dated guys that were much more self sufficient yet they turned out to be less of a man than you are.

You don't think it matters even though she's told him that she gets upset that his current employer hasn't promoted him??? WTF??!!! It's guys that ignore obvious signs like this that end up getting dumped being oblivious of the reason why.

Analysis, since you are with a good woman, you may not need to make an immediate change but she needs to see that you are taking your situation seriously and are making an attempt to change the situation. Your girl sounds like she'll even support you during your effort.

 

[Analysis]

I'm a DJ on the radio...Fun but I don't where else to go with it...I can't be broke all my life, living with my parents....Do you think the best thing for our relationship is for me to call it quits and find a job making some real money that I some what like....

 

[spider_007]

You are supposed to be a man, AND A PROVIDER. If she is talking about marriage, it is obvious she is trying to tell you "step up of get off". Find out if there is a future for you in that carrier and in that station, if you think you'll be making major money in one or two years, then stick with it, if not, figure something else out. THINK LONG TERM.

 

[HeartlessBtch]

You obviously are getting the right advice here. From a girl's perspective I can tell you that YES she'll eventually get tired (she's already waited three years to see a change and nothing has happened). BUT remind yourself that you are not just doing this for her, but for yourself too, you have a college degree and you are still living with your parents? On top of that you make $17? You love this girl, and obviously you are willing tie the knot, so go ahead call it quits and find a better job, not just for her but for yourself too...

 

[I'm Joe Dirt]

Can I ask what your degree is in?

 

[christz]

i sell cell phones for sprint corperate no degree just 5 yrs of retail experience and i've already made indirect account exec. which basiclly cordinates a small team of outside sales agents. whatever they sell i get comission from. as well as my base salary which is 23k a year that's not a lot but factor in 6 or 7 agents selling new contracts it goes up a few thousand depending on volume.

So yah defenitly need to search for a new job, plenty of jobs out there worth your time and effort that pay more than what your gettin now

 

[I'm Joe Dirt]

Yeah, retail is like that. You can get promoted even without a degree or without a relevant degree if you are good at what you do. Congrats man.

The whole point though of this topic is [the main poster] has got to get a better job. It's going to be a little uncomfortable at first but you gotta do it not only to keep this girl but for yourself. Have some dignity man, you can't work all your life at $17k a year with no benfits. Mommy and Daddy aren't always gonna be there to pay for your food and clothes and rent.

 

[Analysis]

My degree is Sociology.....

 

[HereToImprove]

Much of the DJ advice can be applied to your work life as well as your love life:

1. Don't accept second best

2. Work at improving every day

3. Believe in yourself

4. Its a numbers game

5. Don't be needy or desperate

I was out of college and out of work doing temp jobs for about a year, fired by two places, laid off by another, and I felt hopeless (though I was making a LOT more than that - you should not be making that little) until I really worked at improving my lot in my career.

I applied for hundreds of jobs, did 37 interviews in 9 cities, was rejected by almost all of them, turned down a couple offers that were not right, then snagged the work equivalent of a HB9. doing a job I would have never thought I could get. Approach a job search much like DJing and you will succeed.

Keep your head up.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Analysis
I'm a DJ on the radio...Fun but I don't where else to go with it...I can't be broke all my life, living with my parents....Do you think the best thing for our relationship is for me to call it quits and find a job making some real money that I some what like....

One last bit of advice, don't quit your job until you secure another one. It's best to have the insurance of some type of income during your search. Also strange as it seems, companies lean toward offering positions to people who are already working. It makes them feel more secure that they are hiring someone that another company feels is valuable as opposed to someone who isn't currently employed.

 

[Barbillus]

What does she do that she is making 55K?

 

[wind20mph]

Originally posted by Analysis
Hey DJ's,
I want to start out w/ saying that l have been with my for 3 years. She's wonderful ( She's flexible and a giver- She takes me out all the time) I applied the system and it work. My problem is my job...I've work at an entertainment job for 3 years and the most I've made in one year is 17,000. I work full-time hours but I'm still part-time status. I've applied for two full-time positions and got rejected both times. She tells me she gets frustrated some times by me working at this job because there not moving me up. My parents even tell me sometimes that I need a job with benefits. I get frustrated myself some times because I have a college degree and I'm making 13,000 -17,000 and I'm living at home with my parents. My girl makes over 55,000 and has a nice apartment. Will my girls interest level drop if I don't become more self-reliant, get a full-time job w/ benefits and leave my parents house...It's a fun job but I don't know where to go...She always talks about marriage so I know she loves me but I want to keep it that way...What do you think?

hey pal, if I were you I would be looking for my destiny, and not leaving it to my future. What i mean is, have your future plans.