everywomanshero said:
I never though anyone had to apply 3 second rule to calling, but it sounds like you need it. You're probably getting inside your head and imaging all kinds of bad stuff. Step outside your body and see yourself as a third person would. Is there really any reason to be afraid?
I think it comes down to the fact that she may be doing something else when I call. I think it is also linked to my own mentality, when someone calls to speak to me, I am rarely in the mood to have a conversation; if I've not called someone, I'm preoccupied, I do not sit idle. One could say that I am selfish; I hate to be phoned, love to phone others. When it comes to business calls, I know that I am in a position to say to whoever I am talking to, if you cannot give me your time, good luck to you, whether they are men or women.
Yet, when calling a woman for social reasons, it somehow feels like they have the upper hand. I mean, you ask them out, you ask for there number, and if you are lucky they will reciprocate, some, albeit less, effort. Regardless of what you make of yourself (i.e. working out, nice clothes, hygiene, skincare, culture, manners etc.) the woman still is the one who says, I set the boundaries. You've expressed interest in asking me out, so now I'll decide.
Whilst in business, if you make something of yourself, you set all boundaries.
Sorry to go off on a philosophical jaunt; you're right, I'm overanalyzing. And by the way, what is the 3 second rule?