Question on how to approach

[clueless]

Hello,
I've been browsing the forum for a while but just joined as I have a specific question.

At the start of this semester, there was a really cute indian girl in one of my classes. One day she randomly added me on Facebook, even though I never talked to her she said she got my name off of the classlist. Said that her and a friend (guy) from the same class were going to get together and study on mon and wed and if I wanted to study with them. I can't (as i'm busy) so I said no.

Saw her in class but didn't talk much as we both have classes before and after. Then I find out today she dropped the class (the class is horrible). Now I was planning on getting to know her and I am not ready to call it a loss yet. So I was thinking of messaging her. The advice on the forum is to be direct, alpha and take risks without fear of rejection as that comes with the territory. But I don't know this girl well so I don't want to come on too strong either.

I have a friend (who is a girl) who has a birthday this weekend at a bar. I was thinking of inviting my ex-classmate to it. Now I could either try and talk to her on facebook, or what I was thinking was to find her online one day and say :

Me: hey do you think i'm handsome?
(i'm hoping she says yes at this point)
Me: So then you wouldn't mind being my date for this thing.
(i'm assuming she'll ask me what thing)
Me: Well my buddy is celebratng her b--day at this bar and I want to go with an excuse to leave early. . .

I realize I may be overanalyzing this but I am good at making friends but too shy to make the next step. I am willing to make a fool of myself but want to make sure what I am trying sounds ok and not coming off as creepy,

Thanks in advance

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Or next time you see her say

"I haven't seen you in class in a while. Where have you been."

 

[clueless]

Problem is that I don't see her around other than that.Facebook is my only way of getting in touch with her.

 

[oxford comma]

geez u really are clueless. haha. dont ask her if she thinks you are handsome, you should always assume they are attracted. she obviously likes you so all you have to do is ask her to hangout some time. be cool and smooth and you're golden.

 

[clueless]

The main reason I ask is because normally I rely on humor, teasing etc. Which is all fine when I am talking to someone but it's a little hard to bring that into facebook chatting, lol.

 

[schapie]

Just ask her to have lunch or hang out somewhere with you when you're both off school. And from there, you can start with the humor and / or teasing.

 

[clueless]

So I chatted with her a bit today. Bit of background info, Ed is her friend in my class. And she had previously called me smart in the past but she doesn't know me. I'm a little hesitant to ask her to hang out since I barely know her, but since I don't really have any other option i'm assuming just bite the bullet and ask, " Hey, are you busy ----- so and so day?"

Constructive criticism welcome, I want to change cuz being the nice guy just doesn't work, lol.

Me: So Ed tells me you thiink i'm sexy?
Her: lol so what you guys are just gonna give me **** now for life since i dropped
Me: lmfao, just a lil bit. being in that class would drive anyone crazy, need some sort of a release.
Not to mention someone likes making assumptions about people
Her:hey i would LOVE if something referred to me as a "whiz"
Me: yes but how about actually getting to know me first? I might actually turn out to be a genius, lmfao.
although that may be a lil hard, I do have cooties
Her: lmao genius, whiz.. same thing
Me: I don't even know how to react, i've never had someone making assumptions about me that are pretty solid compliments. I can't even get insulted, i'd say this was playing unfair on your part
Her: lol well i guess take it while you can get it!
Me: how about you try to get to know me and not the comp science whiz? lmfao
Her: lol ok i think i could do that
Me: It's reallly not that painful other than the constant flow of lame jokes, somewhat similar to being in overview of comp. sciences, rofl
Her: lmao i haven't heard the term "rofl" since like 1999
Me: I haven't heard the term whiz since around that time too
Her: lmao ok, that's true, you got me

 

[Jeffst1980]

She's into it, but you are overdoing it with the enthusiasm. If you don't play it cool, she's going to get turned off.

You initially attracted her by being somewhat mysterious- right now, you are being a little too goofy and verbose. In general, you should be typing less than her- forcing her to invest more in the conversation. As it stands now, you are coming off as someone that is less experienced with women than she previously believed.

Also, she called you out on "rofl" because it was weird. Drop that one from your repertoire.

It's good to be ****y, but you will still come off as a "nice guy" if you seem too excited to talk to her.

 

[clueless]

so general next move? chat with her again in a week or so? or ask her to hang out? Too soon?

Thanks for all of you guys chiming in, I will try and implement the advice you give me, I am still new to this though so I may not always succeed. But he who does not try is bound to fail, right?

 

[clueless]

Well here's a continuation of our convo

Me:Hey, i'm have to go check out a go kart place later this week, you should come with and give me a girl's opinion
Her: your going to have to explain to me exactly what that is..hahah but i think i'd be down!
Me: Think of bumper cars, without the bumping and on a course. I was planning on either going sunday afternoon or monday evening.
not monday, wednesday. Either day work better for you?

So she seems interested. I just have to make sure to be sexual and bring in kino strong as I can be very shy in those regards. My question though is, how do I get her number? I mean obviously I can ask for it, should I give her mine, let her make a move or just ask?

 

[Desdinova]

I'm surprised how well you're doing, especially since the idea you had in your first post made me want to puke.

How to get the number? Easy. Once she says yes to go karts, just say "Great, send me your number so we can touch base easier".

This stuff really isn't rocket science. The problem seems to be that men have been programmed with the need to be 'romantic' or 'forever in debt' when they're trying to get a girl to go out with them. The fact is, it's no different than asking a friend to come with them to an event or getting a new friend's phone number.

The difference is what you do on the date. You need to communicate that you're NOT looking for a friend and that you're sexually interested in her. You NEED to initiate kino and touch her. That is how you step over the friendship line and get her to see you in a sexual light.