Been dating off and on a great girl for sometime now. Kind, attractive, similar values, very good to me. Thing is, she has had a lot of things go on in her past. She has been in therapy, getting support, and I really admire how she is confronting her issues rather than running away from them like a lot of people tend to. Though she can go a bit too new age for my tastes with her healing endeavors, I am very supportive of her and all of her efforts to heal despite her great challenges. But I've had a hard time feeling good about things when so much is going on with her. The painful stories are pretty intense and now she has health problems that put things into even more crisis mode. She will make comments sometimes about suicide that make me nervous.
We are currently not seeing each other mainly because of my ambivalence about the situation and her being too heartbroken to continue without a commitment from me at this stage. She is 36, wanting to get serious with someone, and I understand. Yet it's hard because I miss her a lot. Despite all the morbid talk I've described, we really get along and have fun when we hang out. At the same time I'm also relieved to not be feeling the stress. So, it's a confusing place to be in and I wonder if anyone has been here. What was your experience and how did it turn out? She's been supportive to me, a good listener in her own right, and a good match on so many levels that I hate to just let it go. Plus I want to help her out in any way I can. It's been a month now since we've communicated and it's a combination of really missing her and really being worried about her.
One final thing I'd like to mention is that, even though she is attractive, I have a hard time feeling attracted to her when there is such intensity going on in her life. Is this a natural reaction or should I take a look at it? Because it's something that makes me feel kind of bad. I'd hate her to think I'm turning my back on her because of any revelations, as that's not who I am. Thanks for any thoughts or suggestions.
We are currently not seeing each other mainly because of my ambivalence about the situation and her being too heartbroken to continue without a commitment from me at this stage. She is 36, wanting to get serious with someone, and I understand. Yet it's hard because I miss her a lot. Despite all the morbid talk I've described, we really get along and have fun when we hang out. At the same time I'm also relieved to not be feeling the stress. So, it's a confusing place to be in and I wonder if anyone has been here. What was your experience and how did it turn out? She's been supportive to me, a good listener in her own right, and a good match on so many levels that I hate to just let it go. Plus I want to help her out in any way I can. It's been a month now since we've communicated and it's a combination of really missing her and really being worried about her.
One final thing I'd like to mention is that, even though she is attractive, I have a hard time feeling attracted to her when there is such intensity going on in her life. Is this a natural reaction or should I take a look at it? Because it's something that makes me feel kind of bad. I'd hate her to think I'm turning my back on her because of any revelations, as that's not who I am. Thanks for any thoughts or suggestions.