Pulled into their chaotic world

[Pandora]

My biggest issue right now is that I get pulled into the chaotic frame of the woman. Women are emotionally chaotic. They will say something in the heat of the moment and then apologize a day later. They change like the wind. Their yes really means no and vice versa. They will even admit that they don't know what they want. Their perspective on many issues is childlike and shortsighted. They can be indifferent to you on the phone, then when they see you they love you again. They are emotional storms.

Even though I know they are not to be taken too seriously, I still get pulled into their frame. I react when they say or do something irrational. I react when she says that she is over me ( then when she see me she fu*ks me). I believe the lies that she tells to herself. It bothers me when they voice an opinion on politics or currents events that is totally ridiculous. It bothers me when they lose interest and I question my self worth. What did I do wrong? Often its nothing. She is just confused as usual. I let her chaos effect my behavior.

She is looking for a strong man who can be indifferent to her chaotic emotions. A rock that can weather the storm and just smirk. Deep down they know that they can not validate you in anyway. They know that you are smarter, more athletic, and more fit for survival. Yet I act as if her opinion of me matters. It doesn't at all. A women's opinion is often warped and perverted. If she were a man I would hardly have any respect for him. I wouldn't care what an emotionally chaotic and indecisive man thought of me. I would laugh if he insulted me. But why do I react when a woman does it? I need to work on this.

 

[Ranger]

When you realize fully and completely that world will destroy you, you will shift.
I can get some butterflies around a truly stellar example of feminine still. But I like it.
I am no PUA and never will be a master of such a low end game. However I work every single day on being the master of myself.

By mastering yourself you won’t ever have to worry about getting booty. Getting a girlfriend or a lover is pretty easy really. It’s child play.
Getting a really steamy hot connection that you can juggle her between “he’s a fantastic fuk” and “I love him.”, and maintain it requires an internal skill that a PUA or passive man can rarely match.

This requires a level of experience that older men have acquired. Either through marriage or LTRs.
Once he gets red pilled his mind puts it all together and catagorizes information properly. He sees his faulty thinking in the past. In other words, he has a frame of reference. Anecdotal information from others can be almost useless most of the time. It doesn’t register in his mind catagoricly. It’s either incomplete or so narrow banded that it’s unusable.

Passive men on here have claimed that I don’t have enough experience. Yet women are effortless for me because I understand them. All men have at one point or another have acted passive to a woman or women. Some men are built that way permanently and can only see danger in many women and thus can’t ever stop talking about some of them as adversarial and/or dangerous.

You are jumping into passive mode when a woman changes mood. Someone just telling you to “not give a fuk” is really bad advise. Horrible actually as it is impossible to donfrom that angle. You should be told to “not go to the adverse effect of a woman’s frame”. Seeing yourself as a stand alone entity with unlimited capacity is required here. That’s what you need to work on. You are a demigod. Know it. Live it. Be it.

 

[btownbuck2012]

Yo is this in reference to that bpd chick who hoovered you recently?

 

[Dr.Suave]

OP at least now you are aware of this issue. That´s already half the battle won.

 

[Pandora]

Yo is this in reference to that bpd chick who hoovered you recently?

No....this is in reference to all women in my life recently.

1.) My sister cant debate without bringing emotions into the debate. She is incapable of having a pleasant exchange of ideas with people without taking it personally. She also uses a lot of female logic and logical fallacies. She justifies things based on emotions and not logic. " This is right because it feels right".

2.) My ex girlfriend, the non borderline one is confused as usual. Always something stressing her out. Job, school etc. One minute she wants to see me the other minute im the cause of her trust issues.

3.) Mom: She is great. Her emotional instability is pretty much nonexistent because she has hit menopause so she is an angel. She just tells me that " if you want to deal with women you have to just accept that they are emotional. Deal with it". Then she laughs and wonders how I will ever get married.

4.) Female friends: You never know if you catch them on a good day or bad day. Some of them are really stable and awesome and are like dudes. But many of them are not.

5.) BPD ex: you already know

6.) Female boss: enough said

I don't think men were supposed to be around women this much. Its exhausting trying to manage their moods and their illogical thinking. I need to just either deal with it or go MGTOW. Im so used to dealing with men. They are straight forward. If you are getting emotional as a guy we will tell you stop acting like a bi*ch. But women you gotta walk on eggshells etc.

When you react, you lose. A guy just has to weather the storm even when its behavior you would never tolerate in a guy. You know in a week or two the girl with be back to normal.

 

[Pandora]

Abundance issue.

Yes it is partially an abundance issue. But when you have a few plates like I sometimes do they are still a pain in the neck. This summer I was sleeping with two plates at the same time. Ex gf and new gf in the same city ( messed up I know). It was still exhausting dealing with the emotions of both of them. I would always react to the nonsense. Just trying to give them advice is exhausting because they don't listen and then they mess up and then come back and say you were right. The you have to worry about them going through your phone and getting mad about other plates. This happens a lot. Being around women is a lot. This is why females don't even like hanging with other females. Its rough. The only saving grace is their sexuality and softness.

 

[Pandora]

Abundance issue.

I have to remember that women rarely say what they mean. I also have to remember that how they feel is not set in stone. It is a momentary thing. So if I take them at their word all the time I will go crazy. This is why they will do something, and then come back and say " I don't know why I said that or did that". Many have no core identity. Especially not the young attractive ones. So I need to remain detached because they always come around.

 

[Pandora]

OP at least now you are aware of this issue. That´s already half the battle won.

You are right man. I just have to learn to be re learn how to be alone. If I cant be alone I will always be a slave to these chicks emotions. I am back in Vegas and none of the old plates want to hang. They are all angry/ over me. So this is a perfect time to do stuff alone. My ego and neediness always wants me to be around some chick. But being content and complete doing activities alone is key. You get used to being around chicks so when you abundance dries up you have to switch your mind into a different mode.

 

[Pandora]

Perfect example of what I am talking about. I have a close friend in his mid thirties. Decent looking skinny white guy and he is absolutely amazing with women. He is now dating a solidly hot chick. He tried to get her for about a year. He would drive up from Virginia Beach VA to the DMV which is 3.5 hrs away and she would flake on him. He would end up sleeping in his car and he would call me to crash at my spot or to hang with him. This happened at least twice.

He never once complained to her about it. He just acted like it didn't happen. Never flipped out or erased her number. Now they are dating and she is in love with him. When I ask her why she did that she barely remembers. She says that she was going through a rough time emotionally and just got out of a break up blah blah blah fuzzy girl logic stuff.

This is my point. I have found that the guys who recognize that everything is temporary with women win. They don't react to ****. My issue is I would have taken her emotionality and bad behavior personally and either called her out on it or blocked her. Most guys on this forum would do that also. But most young women are literally just acting on pure subconscious ID. They don't even take themselves seriously neither should we. They hardly even remember their bad behaviors! Many girls in my past have been like " huh, I did that? Im so sorry".

He resents her a little for her actions when he was wooing her. But he is mostly over it because he eventually got the girl. But he keeps a stone cold poker face whenever a girl is acting disinterested or crazy.

 

[btownbuck2012]

I agree with you tho pandora. Through my own experiences in dealing with them both romantically, platonically and professionally, I have learned to not take them at all seriously. Even the most professional, mature women will pout like a 3 year old under the right circumstances.

 

[Ranger]

I’m no longer at two different positions in the past due to female bosses. Not only were they mood crazy but were easily influenced by idiots and were not quite bright.
I can only take so much stupidity. I am a producer and a damn good one. For myself these days of course.
I will not be cowed by a woman or a man. Especially by a woman.

 

[AttackFormation]

Perfect example of what I am talking about. I have a close friend in his mid thirties. Decent looking skinny white guy and he is absolutely amazing with women. He is now dating a solidly hot chick. He tried to get her for about a year. He would drive up from Virginia Beach VA to the DMV which is 3.5 hrs away and she would flake on him. He would end up sleeping in his car and he would call me to crash at my spot or to hang with him. This happened at least twice.

He never once complained to her about it. He just acted like it didn't happen. Never flipped out or erased her number. Now they are dating and she is in love with him. When I ask her why she did that she barely remembers. She says that she was going through a rough time emotionally and just got out of a break up blah blah blah fuzzy girl logic stuff.

Man, I felt this in my brain like a thud. What can you even say. You can just be in awe.

I still will not change my behavior with this in mind. I cannot go back to tolerating and scrutinizing their behavior, rather than being utterly nonreactive and just filtering out what I don't like. I will keep being as solid as a big steamship in an ocean storm. I feel doing otherwise is mentally selfdestructive.

But then you say that this is a mistake?:

This is my point. I have found that the guys who recognize that everything is temporary with women win. They don't react to ****. My issue is I would have taken her emotionality and bad behavior personally and either called her out on it or blocked her. Most guys on this forum would do that also. But most young women are literally just acting on pure subconscious ID. They don't even take themselves seriously neither should we. They hardly even remember their bad behaviors! Many girls in my past have been like " huh, I did that? Im so sorry".

I can't take your fvcking posts man. You are driving me crazy with this fvcking stuff. I can't take this fvcking shyt! can you hear me???

What you told me about this being shocking and exasperating because we are raised in a matriarchal culture, 100% on point. That's my lifeline.