pseudo-contact by girl who dumped me

alan83

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the story is nothing new. I start off mysterious, challenge and such and as the relationship progresses I become more and more AFC. so the girl dumped me saying the attraction was gone.

I was upset but knew that I can't hang around like her puppy dog or as a "friend". It's been two months now with no contact from me, but I get occasional contact from her. A text message here, an MSN note there and even her friends are sending me notes asking what happened in the relationship.

so the question is, what does this mean? what does it mean if a girl that dumps you occasionally sends you a note or has a friend talk to you? the way my male brain works is like this:
"the girl dumped me, and I moved on and don't talk to her. but she keeps trying to get me to say something or talk to her or her friends. she must still be interested in me"

but I'm thinking that's not really right...that's kind of the AFC hopeful inside of me saying that. what is probably going on her head is:
"why hasn't he bothered contacting me? I have no interest in him anymore, but how can he just act like me dumping him was nothing? I want to feel validation that I hurt him, so let me keep probing him till he starts begging for me back."

so, DJs, what's your take? what do you think it means when the girl that dumps you tries to make contact with you a couple months after you've tried cutting ties?
 

Bvbidd

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"why hasn't he bothered contacting me? I have no interest in him anymore, but how can he just act like me dumping him was nothing? I want to feel validation that I hurt him, so let me keep probing him till he starts begging for me back."

That's what the this site means when it says interest.

Yeah she's wondering about you. That's interest. Doesn't mean she loves you or anything. Stop thinking so much.
 

realsmoothie

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A couple of months is long enough. If you like her, get back in it. If you're "enh", then move on.
 
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